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March 5, 2010

Canada Mulls Emasculating Itself Even Further

Posted by Gregory of Yardale at March 5, 2010 9:20 AM

Believe it or not, Canadians actually fret over whether they're too butch. There is a movement in Canada to metrosexualize the national anthem by removing gender references.

The gender issue, politicians claim, rankling female constituents is the third line, which says "True patriot love in all thy sons command."
Government officials said they have received numerous suggestions on a replacement line, including "Thou dost in us command" and "In all of us command."

Why not just ditch that old-white-guy anthem anyway and choose a new song that's a more appropriate tribute to a country that barely won a gold medal in a sport they invented. I have a few suggestions.




There is also this tune, which is the song most people think of when they think of Canada's contribution to musical culture, but it also has gender issues... quite apart from being a song that celebrates an American literary figure. (Where is the Great Literature of Canada, anyway? I mean, apart from Red Green?)

Hat Tip: KLO NRO

Update, another great suggestion from TED in the comments.

Nice Metrosexual twist at the end, eh?

Update: Suggestions from Mr. Right

And how did I miss this one: