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June 3, 2007

Gary Sheffield Discovers Racist Conspiracy

These days ever more baseball players are Hispanic, and ever fewer are black. Could this be because Hispanics are more likely to be interested in baseball? Nah. Detroit Tiger DH Gary Sheffield has the answer: it's because Latin players are easier for the evil white man to control:

I called it years ago. What I called is that you're going to see more black faces, but there ain't no English going to be coming out. … [It's about] being able to tell [Latin players] what to do — being able to control them.
Where I'm from, you can't control us. […] These are the things my race demands. So, if you're equally good as this Latin player, guess who's going to get sent home? I know a lot of players that are home now can outplay a lot of these guys.

Certainly no one can control Sheffield, who as Milwaukee fans might recall is not above sulking at the expense of his performance, and whose mouth cost the NYC tabloids gallons of ink when he played for the Yankees.

As for those easily controlled Latin types, here's Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano assaulting his own catcher Michael Barrett in the dugout Friday:

Barrett ended up in the hospital with a split lip that required six stitches. A little more self-control might improve the game — as would less racial grievance moonbattery.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at June 3, 2007 6:16 PM

Comments

Van Helsing,

I hit this earlier today as well...I linked your take as well.

Posted by: Nigel at June 3, 2007 10:08 PM

Everybody is out to get "African-Americans": Hispanics, Jews, Anglo Saxons, African-Africans, African-Hispanics, African-French...

Excuse me - but didn't Sheffield basically say "employers won't hire us because we refuse to follow the boss's orders"??

Posted by: Jimbo at June 4, 2007 6:05 AM

Translation: if you don't get what you want, it's because of racism. And even though it's the Hispanics who are getting your job, it's the white man's fault.

Well that covers all your bases. I'll bet those Koreans are somehow in on this, too.

I also think it's odd that he says "Where I'm from, you can't control us." I assume he's NOT referring to the democratic party, which controls them completely.

Posted by: NudeGayWhalesForJesus at June 5, 2007 2:52 PM