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May 30, 2006

Saint Al Purchases Eco-Indulgences

Fresh off having his messianic ego pumped to a new immensity at Cannes, Al Gore has popped up at the Hay Festival in Britain, where he bellowed about the "planetary emergency" that is about to engulf us all in cosmic doom if we don't regulate the American economy to a standstill.

Insufficiently taxed and regulated carbon emissions constitute a "danger which could bring the end of civilization!" Al intoned. Without video, you can only imagine his eyes popping like the Runaway Bride's, his arms pinwheeling wildly.

On a more sober note, Gore glumly observed that most Americans don't perceive the miniscule effect carbon emissions might have on natural climate fluctuations to be a problem. Now members of the global warming cult getting into a position to sabotage the economy — that would be a problem.

We have ten years left, according to Prince Albert, before "crossing the point of no return." After this, progressives will presumably give up on trying to hobble the economy, since it will be too late to save planet Earth anyway.

Undoubtedly, Al's tireless jetting around to promote global warming hysteria emits a lot more carbon than a fleet of Hummers in constant motion. Yet the man who never gets tired of saying "I used to be the next President" remains pure in his heart by "purchasing verifiable reductions in CO2 elsewhere."

"Danger! Danger! Planetary emergency! Must destroy economy! Danger!"

Posted by Van Helsing at May 30, 2006 8:01 AM


It's nice to know we have ten years left before disaster strikes.

Isn't that the same scaremongering that noted Oceanographer Ted Danson, of "Cheers" fame, used when he said in 1988 that if we didn't agree to his radical environmental plan the oceans would be dead in ten years?

I was just down at the Atlantic shore this weekend. Looks pretty alive to me.

Posted by: Mike's America at May 30, 2006 11:13 AM

It's always 10 years. 10 is just short enough to be scary, but just long enough for the vast majority to have forgotten your previous pronouncements of doom by the time you're working up to the next.

Posted by: Archonix at May 30, 2006 11:32 AM

Al Gore is truly Lost in Space.

Posted by: Steve at May 30, 2006 2:45 PM

Weren't the asshats telling us in the 70's that an impending ice age was going to wipe us out? Guess that didn't work.

Posted by: nikko at May 30, 2006 3:56 PM

In the 60s and early 70s it was global warming/Club of Rome based doomsday scenarios - embodies in the classic SOYLENT GREEN. The Club of Rome had suggested that known reserves of gold would be depleted by 1981, mercury by 1985, tin by 1987, zinc by 1990, petroleum by 1992, and copper, lead, and natural gas by 1993.

Then by the mid to late 70s it was Ice Age hysteria. By the late 80s it was back to Global Warming. has excellent articles and commentary on the subject.

Posted by: General Jack D. Ripper at May 31, 2006 8:50 AM

And yet the world is getting warmer, ice caps are melting, islands are dissappearing, all reputable scientists agree global warming is indeed an issue and Carbon Dioxide is linked to it..

Oh, all except the Americans....


Posted by: Twats at May 31, 2006 11:04 AM

Twats is a typical example of the brain dead zombies who cant think for themselves.

At one time the consensus was that the world was flat, nearly everyone agreed. Those who said the Earth was a sphere were branded as lunatics.

The early has gotten slightly warmer. The output of the sun has also slightly increased. The world has been much much warmer in the past (see Vikings circa 1000 A.D.)

Islands are disappearing? So? Land has appeared and dissappeared over the eons. Nothing new there. Ice caps melting? When the dinosaurs roamed the Earth there were no ice caps at all. I guess all those T-Rexs driving SUVs and Hummers caused global warming back then.

CO2 is minor trace gas. If you want to use your brain consult

Posted by: General Jack D. Ripper at May 31, 2006 11:51 AM

Posted by: V the K at May 31, 2006 12:53 PM

Islands disappearing? Would this be the Indian Maldives, allegedly disappearing under a rapidly rising ocean? Funny that the Indian Ocean has been going down over the last few decades... the maldives have suffered a few very nasty storm surges, but this isn't new; there's a lot of mythology built up about it over the centuries, and the islanders go hiding in caves when it happens.

Posted by: Archonix at May 31, 2006 6:38 PM

The world was warmer 1000 years ago....
3 warmest years on record are all since 1998... so I cant think for myself.. but at least I dont make up facts... Guess I'm about as much of a lunatic as those who really believe we are not changing the climate.. .think about what you said there..
CO2 is a greenhouse gas - again, a fact - there is some arguement about the amount of effect CO2 may have, but no arguement that it contributes to temperature change (from any scientist anyway).
Oh, and the islands are in the Pacific, people from Vanuatu have already been moved due to rising sea levels.. And you question ice caps melting - where do you get your news??? Oh, from sites such as junkscience - written by sceptics for sceptics... why not try some real science magazines? New Scientist will tell you plenty..

or go there and see how they are declining, or watch documentaries that will show you how both poles are changing..

So no ice caps when the continents were mostly around the equator - helpful arguement there then...

Posted by: Twats at June 1, 2006 6:27 AM

World warmer in 1000 AD - you are just making that up.. .check your facts again.. warmest 3 years on history have all been recently!

Clearly islands dissappearing means nothing to you, despite loss of life to other people and families, and nope, not Indian Ocean, in the Pacific - Vanuatu .
Seeing as the earth looked very different in the time of dinosaurs - check where the continents were..

For a brain dead zombie I seem to be way ahead of you in the knowledge stakes...

Posted by: Twats at June 1, 2006 8:24 AM