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December 2, 2009
A Christmas Tree Moonbats Can Wipe Their Feet On
Posted by Van Helsing at December 2, 2009 7:24 AM
What would happen if moonbats designed a Christmas tree? This:

When is a Christmas tree not a Christmas tree? When it is a giant cone covered in what appears to be green doormats.
Shoppers stared in bemusement at the mysterious object that landed in a shopping precinct in Poole, Dorset, this week. Some compared it to a giant traffic cone, a witch's hat or a cheap special effect from an early episode of Doctor Who.
The 33ft structure turned out to be their Christmas tree, designed according to the principles of health and safety, circa 2009.
Thus it has no trunk so it won't blow over, no branches to break off and land on someone's head, no pine needles to poke a passer-by in the eye, no decorations for drunken teenagers to steal and no angel, presumably because it would need a dangerously long ladder to place it at the top.
Unless of course the angel was forbidden because the last thing our politically correct rulers would want is for Christmas to remind anyone of Christianity. But the emphasis here is on safety, the lawyer-inflicted obsession with which is infantilizing society. Yelps the "town centre manager" Richard Randall-Jones:
People think you can just go into the woods, chop down a tree and put it up in the high street but if it blows over and kills someone then somebody is liable.
According to the Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents, Christmas trees are one of the most hazardous objects in the home. They can poke you in the eye with their branches or strain your back when you carry them in and out. It's surprising the Nanny State hasn't gotten around to banning them yet.
On a tip from Rob Banks.
Comments
I always buy my Christmas Tree from the local Boy Scout Troop, just to double-whammy the moonbat.
Posted by: V the K at December 2, 2009 7:31 AM
I go chop mine with my family in the woods, V the K. You can't beat the great scent it brings in the house. What a joke, a 33ft tall, bare, carpet covered cone. This is the epitome of moonbattery.
Posted by: Jay B at December 2, 2009 8:28 AM
But, But...Jay B. you're depriving on owl family of a home...what an...owlist you are! And all that CO2 you spewed into the atmosphere, with you car (probably a gas-guzzling SUV)just to chop down a tree, that you will eventually throw in the garbage. (*nudge* *nudge*).
Posted by: Graycat at December 2, 2009 9:05 AM
You call that a christmas tree without any lights and decarations? It looks more like ether a wizards or clowns hat or a inverted ice cream cone
Posted by: SPURWING PLOVER at December 2, 2009 9:10 AM
And lefties say there's no war on Christmas.
Posted by: G at December 2, 2009 9:27 AM
OK, even I'll admit the Health and Safety culture in Britain is absolutely out of control, and has been for some time now (the picture itself made me laugh at how ludicrous it looks, we've got a proper Christmas tree in this town). I've heard people blame Labour for this madness, but then the people blaming Labour tend to be Tories, and they would blame Labour.
We do need to do something about this, but I'm frankly at a loss as to the solution. Some would tout David Cameron, and he does tempt me with his talk of "Big Society rather than Big Government". But one part of me says he won't do anything (Cameron vs. Europe is a battle he'll lose, and why would I believe what a politician says anyway?) and another part of me just plain won't support Thatcherites.
Oh well, guess I'll just try to enjoy the ride.
Posted by: Serenity at December 2, 2009 9:27 AM
It's not a tree.... Green Giant was playing Hary Potter and left his hat laying there.
I usually go with the plastic replicas anymore. But even so, it looks about the same as a realistic tree and I don't have to worry about needles in the carpet, throwing it out after Christmas, or my dog lapping up the water for it (he's usually a smart dog, but when we got a real tree a few years ago, he would always do this. lol) .
Posted by: Atomic Lib Smasher at December 2, 2009 10:09 AM
Serenity, with all due respect, it is sitting back and "enjoying the ride" that got Britain into this mess to begin with. Failure to stand up for the rights of the individual, not just politically "acceptable" individuals. Over-reliance on the government for solutions to problems that common folk exercising good old-fashioned common sense could handle easily. Believing that there is such a thing as a free lunch, and moreover that each person is entitled to one. And yes, the Tories blame Labour and Labour blames, well, everyone else, but in Britain as in America, this monster is a bipartisan creation.
Americans are beginning to wake up to the fact that if left unchecked the growth of government will rob us of the freedoms we enjoy. Those freedoms are not guaranteed to last indefinitely; they must be protected, nurtured, and watched over lest they be stolen away "for our own good." We have watched what has become of the once great British nation with sadness, both out of respect for our friends and allies and out of the understanding that the same fate awaits America if we don't do something about it. You are correct in thinking that one politician won't make a difference - it is very rare indeed that such a person comes along, and you can't count on that happening when you need it. The best you can hope for is to support those that will keep the government out of your hair and out of the way; you'll just have to live with the parts of those people's beliefs you don't care for. The worst thing you can do is passively go along to get along. You must be heard, you must antagonize, and you must be a thorn in the side of anyone who would seek to deprive you of your liberty.
It's time to slay the dragon.
Posted by: CoderInCrisis at December 2, 2009 10:23 AM
@Serenity
There's always the UKIP. Or if you're seriously pissed off, the BNP.
Posted by: Rob Banks at December 2, 2009 10:37 AM
If the tree is not historically accurate to the very one growing above the manger where Lord Baby Jesus embarked on his path to everlasting righteousness, then it has no place in Christian Nation of America!
Posted by: Sporadic Small Arms Fire at December 2, 2009 10:49 AM
I've had bigger.
Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at December 2, 2009 11:11 AM
Me too.
Posted by: Barney Frank at December 2, 2009 11:11 AM
LOL! Offended by something not of Christian origin being treated as such. Fox along with it's "little helpers" trot this out each year. It is also very cute how you use the key words to stoke fear into others too "freedom", "the left", "war","stolen", "nurtured","Christians". True disciples of Frank Luntz, but hardly Jesus.
Posted by: Anonymous at December 2, 2009 11:27 AM
I stupidly and irrationally hate Christians. I'm a leftist.
Posted by: Meh/Snot/Beer Baron/Liberal Bias and 14 other personalities at December 2, 2009 11:33 AM
Our town tree is a natural one were holding the ligting of the tree on saturday our local grammer school kids will be making decarations for it
Posted by: Flu-Bird at December 2, 2009 12:57 PM
anon at 11:27am we realize that being a lefty you probably got a steaming pile of dogdoo for Christmas so I can understand your hostility. Just remember that not all of us had assmunch leftist parents and please try to get in the spirit of the season.
Posted by: Farmer Ted at December 2, 2009 1:17 PM
To you getting in the spirit is commercializing the faux holiday and cry war that does not actually exist. And Christmas here, hmm a household of atheists, Catholics, a Muslim, and a Lutheran.
Posted by: Anonymous at December 2, 2009 1:24 PM
Is anonopussy trying to start a Bennaton ad here or something?
Posted by: Atomic Lib Smasher at December 2, 2009 2:35 PM
Interesting mix you got there anon, but let me guess no one gets in the spirit so as to not offend anyone,right?
A season celebrating the birth of Christ is hardly a faux holiday but if you want to be a scrooge more power to you. See that's called not judging, you should try it sometime. :)
Posted by: Farmer Ted at December 2, 2009 2:47 PM
Anon - you're wrong again. Being "offended" is something idiot libs like yourself do. We are amused at how ridiculous this is. Offended? NOT
Posted by: man of few words at December 2, 2009 2:49 PM
@Rob Banks
I've nothing in particular against UKIP, but I also don't see where they're going. Withdraw from the EU? There no precedent for such a thing, and while an EFTA-style free trade agreement may be viable in theory, I don't think the benefits of trying to make it happen would be worth alienating the rest of Europe by trying to pull out of the EU.
As for the BNP, let's put it this way. If it's the BNP or death, I welcome the reaper.
Posted by: Serenity at December 2, 2009 4:59 PM
"Withdraw from the EU? There no precedent for such a thing,...
"Posted by: Serenity at December 2, 2009 4:59 PM"
(Blinks twice and re-reads the post)
Shall we start with Portugal seceding from the Kingdom of Galicia in 1095 and work our way to Norway seceding from Sweden in 1907?
Posted by: KHarn at December 2, 2009 5:14 PM


