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January 15, 2009
Ideal Transportation Secretary Found for Obama
Since the Moonbat Messiah's pick for Secretary of Transportation, fellow Illinois pol Ray LaHood, has no qualifications other than a cozy relationship with the Teamster's Union, The One might want to consider going instead with the truly visionary Alfie Carrington — aka, the moon man:
The Macomb County [Michigan] moon man stood next to his forlorn flying saucer, which sat perched on milk crates in a weedy patch along Interstate 94. He railed against corporate conspirators and misinformed scientists.
According to the moon man, a nefarious cabal has blocked him from laying his hands on the necessary money to complete his perpetual flying machine — a machine he says, that could reach Mars in a mere two weeks.
"Bankers promise calls they never return," said Alfie Carrington, who when not working in his laboratory makes ends meet as a part-time construction worker. "The governor's office told my mother no. And these so called scientific experts who have never seen it, say it won't work."
And so the earthbound saucer sits north of 14 Mile, smothered in a blanket of bird-dung and snow.
"I say 'Is saucer aircraft technology in somebody's college?'" he asked. "There's no MIT for this. There's no Berkeley for this. They say 'Where did you get your saucer information from.' Nowhere. Because the saucer information is in here."
And with that, he knowingly tapped his temple with his forefinger. …
Carrington said he accepts disdain as the price of genius. And although he has no formal scientific training, Carrington does hold an associate's degree in psychology. …
He claims he's spent 30 years and $60,000 of his own money building the flying saucer, which he insists will replace the automobile and render the combustion engine and gasoline irrelevant.
Carrington's imaginative approach to transportation would dovetail nicely with the views of moonbats like Steven Chu and Carol Browner, who seem to think our economy can run without the use of fossil fuels or nuclear energy.
Yes we can, moon man!
On a tip from Joe from North Branch, Michigan.
Posted by Van Helsing at January 15, 2009 9:40 AM
Gee, if only he belonged to the UAW. He could tap into some of that sweet, sweet bailout money.
On a related note: A Chevy Van from 1979 called, it wants its custom art job back. (Submitted for consideration for the next open thread, but the van reference ties it back to the transportation theme of this thread. Yeah, I know. Weak.)
Posted by: V the K at January 15, 2009 9:48 AM
Alfi needs to apply for government grants. According to the blurb at Government Grant List:
Every year the government is required to give away free money to citizens and residents of the United States. Over $50 billion dollars is given away each year to individuals and businesses in the form of free grants. This free money can be used for almost any purpose - including to buy a house, start a business, pay for college, buy equipment, pay salaries, buy school supplies, get out of debt, buy clothing, pay for child camp, pay for music, art or education lessons, paying off your medical bills, pay for gas for your car, and anything else you desire.
His spacemobile should be a shoe-in and can easily be classified under the "anything else you desire" category. Hey, if the government's going to waste billions some of it might as well go to comedy relief.
Posted by: Kevin R at January 15, 2009 11:40 AM
Moonbattery Forummers! I beg you DO NOT click on V of K's link without industrial strength eye protection!!!!
Posted by: Karin at January 15, 2009 12:10 PM
Are you sure BARACK OBAMA didnt arive on earth in that ship? HE CAME FROM AREA 51
Posted by: Spurwing Plover at January 15, 2009 12:28 PM