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August 1, 2008

Keith Olbermann Explains the Second Amendment

The two primary pillars of freedom in America are the First and Second Amendments. The Orwellian "Fairness Doctrine" will take out the former; the amazing Keith Olbermann has already dispensed with the latter. He's revealed that the right to bear arms "obviously" only applies to muskets:

Despite years of fog created by the NRA and right-wing organizations, that isn't very complicated: For the purposes of forming a state militia, you're entitled to keep and bear arms. Obviously, those would have to be the kind of arms in use in 1791, when the Bill of Rights was passed — the musket, the wheel-lock, the flint lock, the 13th century Chinese hand canon.

Where would we be without the great legal scholars at MSNBC to clear away the fog and explain away our rights?

Olbermann further revealed that in addition to being the "Worst Person in the World" for upholding our right to defend ourselves, Justice Antonin Scalia is a "clown" — which has got to hurt, coming from a circus act like Olbie. Also revealed was the NRA's secret agenda: "to increase deaths by gun in this country."

Lunatics like Keith Olbermann could soon have their candidate of choice in the White House.

Keith_Olbermann_shh.jpg
Olbermann wants Scalia and the NRA to shut up about our rights.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at August 1, 2008 7:59 AM

Comments

Using Olbermann's logic, his right to free speech would require him to speak using 18th Century grammar and vocabulary. Likewise, the freedom of press would limit the press to print on then used machinery. He still continues to be a clueless ass hat.

Posted by: Penfold at August 1, 2008 8:40 AM

Also revealed was the NRA's secret agenda: "to increase deaths by gun in this country."

You forgot MSNBC's secret agenda: to decrease the number of brain cells in this country.

Posted by: Pam at August 1, 2008 8:42 AM

I think Olbermann is supposed to be entertainment, not political commentary. Entertainment like WWE or Nascar, but for people with worthless college degrees.

Posted by: Mockinbird at August 1, 2008 9:00 AM

So, is it OK to have a knife (over three inches banned in many places - that knife set you just bought at the grocery had better be shipped, you can't carry it - concealed yet! - to the car), crossbow (classed as a "firearm" and/or just banned)?

Backyard or car/truck, how about a cannon firing 6 or 12 pound projectiles?

Posted by: teqjack at August 1, 2008 9:41 AM

Olbermann is one of the smartest liberals I know of.

:-)

Says a LOT about silly liberals, huh?

Posted by: Jimbo at August 1, 2008 10:07 AM

I wonder when exactly Olbermann went off the deep end. He was always a squishy liberal, but he at least used to have some sense of perspective. I used to find his MSNBC show amusing - now it it just strange and sad at the same time.

Something about George W. Bush seems to have whipped the lefties into a religious fervor. It must be that they lost two extremely close elections: one in which a phony environmentalist (Gore-Al, to Onion readers) won the popular vote but lost the electoral college and which libs still claim was "stolen" from them, and one in which they figured that anyone was bound to unseat W and there was no way they could lose. So they ran a turnip (Kerry) against him.

Actually, that's an unfair statement. A turnip might have won. I remember a week after the 2004 election hearing the steady stream of laments from people: "I voted for Kerry. Everyone I know voted for Kerry. Everyone hates Bush. How did we lose?" You lost because W, for all of his faults, is an experienced and principled leader who will tell you where he stands and stick to it. John Kerry is a turnip. Liberals take no notice of anyone outside their own mindset, and hence didn't notice that W had lots of supporters. If you only watch the network news and read the New York Times I suppose you wouldn't know that.

Posted by: CoderInCrisis at August 1, 2008 10:09 AM

I really think this guy is just paid to be outrageous and inflammatory.

That said, just because he's paid doesn't make it OK to yell "FIRE" in a crowded room. You want to take away second amendment rights, Keith? Well, I'll tell you...come after my firearms and there WILL be an increase in gun deaths by at least one.

Responsible gun ownership is a right...and an important one. Responsible gun owners don't shoot people because of an argument, they don't leave guns around for kids to play with, they don't use their weapons to rob liquor stores. Take away our guns and (are you listening, Keith?) ONLY THE BAD GUYS WILL HAVE THEM. Yep, hard as it is for you to grasp Mr. O, bad guys (listen hard) DON'T RESPECT OR OBEY THE LAW. They will (gasp) continue to own and use ILLEGAL FIRE ARMS!

You want to turn the U.S. into a socialist state where we, the people, have no rights and are crushed under the law. Well, in the words of Moses "...from my cold dead fingers."

Posted by: matt at August 1, 2008 10:41 AM

>Obviously, those would have to be the kind of arms in use in 1791, when the Bill of Rights was passed — the musket, the wheel-lock, the flint lock, the 13th century Chinese hand canon.>

OK, let's say (For the sake of argument) that he's right on this point. What else was available at the time?

As teqjack points out, artillery was available to anyone who could afford it and (I think) restrictions didn't exist untill the twentieth century.
Breech-Loaders had been made (In limited numbers) since the 17th century
Rifles were common.
Pistols were known and used, too.
Muskets had a lug for mounting a bayonet, so the ban on bayonet mounts a few years ago would be unconstitutional according to Olbermann.
There was a weapon known as a "roman candle" musket which was considered for adoption by the Continental Army. This gun fired several balls in seqence when the trigger was pulled once. By the deffinition in the Federal Firearms Act of 1934, this weapon is a MACHINEGUN.

It's your turn again, Keith Olbermann.

Posted by: KHarn at August 1, 2008 10:47 AM

You want to turn the U.S. into a socialist state where we, the people, have no rights and are crushed under the law.

Why yes, Matt, I do! Thanks for watching the show! ~ Keith O.

Posted by: Pam at August 1, 2008 12:49 PM

Matt said: "Take away our guns and (are you listening, Keith?) ONLY THE BAD GUYS WILL HAVE THEM." I don't think you understand the logic, if there are no more guns there will be no more bad guys, I mean it's as simple as that. Just ask that sleeping Canadian guy on his bus ride to Winnipeg yesterday, sleeping peacefully when some jerk with a gun shoots his head off ... what? he used a knife, well then by gosh we gotta ban them too, just ask Keith.

Posted by: wz at August 1, 2008 1:52 PM

Something about George W. Bush seems to have whipped the lefties into a religious fervor.

That's because he's the Batman to all these MSM Jokers.

Batman = Bush?

Posted by: BURNING HOT at August 1, 2008 7:00 PM

CoderInCrisis,

I think it is because Bush has boldness, depth of character and is willing to risk admiration and popularity to do what he thinks is right which intimidates and diminishes those who do not have such qualities. In response they try to diminish him to alleviate their self-realized shortcomings.

Posted by: IOpian at August 2, 2008 8:30 AM

wz, I just didn't understand. Silly me, now I get it! No guns, no bad guys. Sorta like "$4 gas? Inflate your tires". The answers are so SIMPLE.

Oh, and thanks for the response Keith. Let's have a beer sometime. Maybe in a bar in Compton around 11:30 p.m. or so. Wonder if your views on gun ownership would change after that...

Posted by: matt at August 2, 2008 10:07 AM

Olbermann obviously has been hitting on the bong a lot more lately as it appears he has flushed any semblance of logic down the toilet. I say, drop him off at midnight in the middle of Watts and then see how he feels about the need for legally armed citizens. What a moron.

Posted by: HoosierArmyMom at August 3, 2008 8:44 AM

" This year will go down in history.
For the first time, a civilized nation has full gun registration. Our streets will be safer, our police more efficient, and the world will follow our lead into the future." Adolf Hitler, 1935.

Posted by: Carl Allphin at August 4, 2008 7:03 PM