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June 30, 2008
Nanny Nazis Regulate the Holes in Salt Shakers
Nothing could be too small to escape the notice of Britain's totalitarian Nanny State — not even the holes in a salt shaker:
Pot-holed roads, crumbling schools, litter-strewn streets — there's no shortage of problem areas crying out for their attention. But councils believe they have found a better use for their money: reducing the number of holes in chip shop salt shakers. Research has suggested that slashing the holes from the traditional 17 to five could cut the amount people sprinkle on their food by more than half. And so at least six councils have ordered five-hole shakers — at taxpayers' expense — and begun giving them away to chip shops and takeaways in their areas.
Salt — an essential nutrient, without which many foods don't taste very good — is on the rapidly expanding list of substances bureaucrats have decided we need to be protected against.
Unfortunately, people have been seen unscrewing the lids of the five-hole shakers to get at the salt inside. Clearly legislation is required to prevent this. Alternatively, they might try non-opening shakers with no holes and no salt.
On a tip from mega.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:05 AM | Comments (25)
AP Discovers the Benefits of Drilling
According to the endlessly repeated Democrat talking points, it would be useless to drill in the ANWR wasteland, off the coasts, or anywhere else environmentalist extremists have forbidden it, because it would take years and years to get the oil out, and it would only lower prices by a few pennies anyway. But wait, what's this from liberal AP:
Khurais Oil Field, Saudi Arabia — This massive oil field surrounded by the desolate sands of Saudi Arabia's vast eastern desert feels like the middle of nowhere. But what happens over the next year at Khurais, one of Saudi Arabia's last undeveloped giant oil fields, could hold the key to what drivers will pay at the pump for years to come. […] The project forms the centerpiece of the Saudi plan to increase the total amount of oil it can produce to 12.5 million barrels per day by the end of 2009 — up from a little more than 11 million barrels per day now.
It seems that oil can be extracted from the ground in less than a decade, and that increased supply really will lower prices, just like we learned in Economics 101 — but only if it's someone else's oil.
Here's an idea: why don't we give Alaska back to the Russians? Then they could drill the oil, and we could buy it from them. Cuba and China are already helping themselves to the neglected oil fields off the Florida coast.
On a tip from Matt L.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:45 AM | Comments (14)
Even Gray Lady Admits Downside to Mugabe
Robert Mugabe personifies the future liberals have planned for us. He took the "Breadbasket of Africa" and turned it into a squalid, totalitarian hellhole with his race-based socialist ideology in the name of sticking it to Whitey on behalf of the historically oppressed. But even moonbats who deify his socialist colleague Nelson Mandela have a hard time excusing Mugabe's savage excesses. The New York Times' Nicholas Kristof has been forced to admit the obvious: Africa was much better off before it was supposedly liberated.
Being a moonbat, Kristof can't help but bleat piteously about white racism. He condemns Britain for the "tribalism" of not liking it when white farmers — mostly descendants of Britons — are beaten and killed so that their land can be stolen and then left to lie fallow. But even Kristof was forced to cough this up:
When I grew up in the 1970s, a central truth was that Ian Smith was evil and Mugabe heroic. So it was jolting on my last visit to Zimbabwe, in 2005, to see how many Zimbabweans looked back on oppressive white rule with nostalgia. They offered a refrain: "Back then, at least parents could feed their children."
One day American parents holding their starving babies in their arms may say: Yes, capitalists were racist demons with horns growing out of their heads, just like they teach at school. But there used to be food.
On a tip from Burning Hot.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:07 AM | Comments (8)
Obama Tool Wesley Clark Attacks McCain's Experience
Here's a criticism I thought I'd never hear from an Obama supporter. Creepy ex-General and BHO stooge Wesley Clark says that war hero, former squadron commander, two-term Congressman, and four-term Senator John McCain would make a lousy President because of his lack of experience.
Sniffs Clark:
I don't think riding in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to be president.
Obama's most notable experiences consist of getting really stoned a lot in college, which he brags about like the teenager he still mentally is in his excruciatingly revealing Dreams from My Father. BHO has no serious qualifications at all, a fact that the bumbling Clark apparently believes he can obscure by attacking McCain's decades of relevant experience.
After denouncing his thin resume, next Clark et al. can go after McCain for spending 20 years in the pews of an anti-American church of race hate, for hanging around with unrepentant terrorists who bombed the Pentagon, for being an insufferable snob, for being married to a nasty little America-hating piranha, for advocating surrender to the terrorists we have on the ropes in Iraq, for not being able to decide whether Iran is a threat, for promising to suck up to hostile dictators, for being likely to subordinate our national interests to the execrable United Nations, for wanting to destroy our healthcare system with socialism, for intending to gut the military, for being likely to appoint left-wing extremists as judges, for promising to jack taxes through the ceiling, for having the most liberal voting record in the entire Senate, for being incapable of speaking publicly without a teleprompter, for hanging out with sleaze bucket Tony Rezko, for being a compulsive liar, for having a campaign that draws anti-Semites and 9/11 conspiracy kooks, for suggesting previous administrations should be imprisoned, for standing ready to deflect legitimate criticism with the trusty race card, for being pushed by the vile and fanatical mainstream media, et cetera.
The nice thing about projection is it gives liberals lots of rocks to throw.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:11 AM | Comments (18)
June 29, 2008
Google Shuts Down Anti-Obama Blogs
The leftists at Google help the communist Chinese censor their opposition, so it should come as no surprise that they appear to be doing the same for Obama.
Among Google's many Internet tentacles is Blogger, which allows people with no technical knowledge to set up blogs for free. But of course, nothing is really free — the price you pay to use Blogger is subjecting yourself to Google's control.
NewsBusters reports that at least seven blogs belonging to the anti-Obamination Just Say No Deal coalition have had their plugs temporarily pulled by Google:
- Blue Lyon
- Come A Long Way
- Hillary or Bust
- McCain Democrats
- NObama Blog
- politicallizard.blogspot.com
- Reflections in Tyme
Supposedly, they were suspected of being "spam" blogs. Even Google's authoritarian soul mates behind the bamboo curtain would be ashamed to use such a lame excuse to harass opponents.
It seems most of the targeted blogs are not conservative, but pro-Shrillary. Something tells me the honeymoon Shrillary and the Obamessiah have been staging for the media is going to end in an ugly divorce.
On a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:45 PM | Comments (8)
What's in a Name?
Some say the Obamessiah has no qualifications to be President. But from the point of view of moonbats, he actually has three: 1) he is a left-wing extremist who has spent his life surrounded by fanatics who hate America and everything it stands for; 2) he's mulatto; 3) his name recalls America's two worst enemies over the last decade, Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein.
No, Obama's name doesn't mean he's still a Muslim. But out of all the unqualified left-wing mulattoes out there, why did liberals settle on him? Because they like his name. If this were 60 years ago, they'd fall in line behind someone named Tojo Hidler.
Don't believe me? Here's some evidence:
Barack Obama's middle name Hussein has been used in some corners as a rallying cry to cast false aspersions against him, but in a growing movement, some of his supporters are adopting his middle name as a show of solidarity with the candidate. […]
"My name is such a vanilla, white-girl American name," Ashley Holmes of Indianapolis told the [New York Times]. She said she changed her name online "to show how little meaning 'Hussein' really has."
Ashley actually shows how much meaning "Hussein" really has. She doesn't like her own name because it's American. The name Hussein appeals to her because it represents the other — i.e., the enemy. This is Obama's appeal in a nutshell.
Does anyone think he'd have gotten this far if his name were Leroy Jackson?
On tips from V the K and Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:41 AM | Comments (24)
June 28, 2008
Moonbats Turn Kindergartener into Transgender Freakazoid
Frankenstein's monster was downright wholesome next to what social engineering has wrought:
As V the K notes, this 6-year-old experiment, who despite appearances is actually a boy, is the perfect liberal child — "feminized, confused, living in denial of reality, and demanding that society cater to it."
The depraved propagandists at ABC News are delighted with this bold leap forward into our progressive future, dutifully calling little Jazz Jennings "her" and bleating about how wonderful it is that "she" has been turned into a walking billboard for liberal perversion, so that the "transgender children" lefties have invented will no longer have to "live in the shadows."
Jazz's moonbat mommy explains how she raises her son:
We'll say things like, "You're special. God made you special." Because there aren't very many little girls out there that have a penis.
The poor kid is only in kindergarten and they've already made him into a freak. It won't be long before they start with the permanently disfiguring hormone therapy.
Posted by Van Helsing at 1:37 PM | Comments (78)
William Delahunt, Artist's Muse
Liberal Congressman William Delahunt (D-MA) may be a useful idiot tool of the hostile dictator Hugo Chavez, but he's also an inspiration. His recent suggestion that he would like to see Dick Cheney's Chief of Staff David Addington killed by al Qaeda inspired this artwork by HUGH:
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:50 PM | Comments (2)
EU Bureauweenies Caught Red-Handed Robbing Taxpayers
There is one "competency" at which the EU bureaucracy is actually competent: stuffing the pockets of corrupt apparatchiks with taxpayer money. In the video below, we see the bureauweenies showing up to collect a generous daily subsistence allowance to which they are not entitled, before hightailing it out of town.
The best part is when German MEP Hiltrud Breyer of the Green Party flies into a panic on realizing her naked greed has been exposed. Unfortunately, EU security soon comes to the rescue and shuts down the camera.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:37 PM | Comments (7)
June 27, 2008
Amnesty International Hits Bottom with Phony Gitmo Display
Amnesty International used to be on the side of the good guys, drawing attention to the horrors inflicted by America's authoritarian enemies. Now, it is a shill for those same enemies, and its farcical tactics are worthy of the most juvenile left-wing extremists. The group that once defended liberty has reduced itself to touring the country with a phony replica of a Club Gitmo maximum security cell, as part of its campaign to discredit America and whip up support for the Muslim terrorists attempting to bring about a worldwide totalitarian caliphate.
The display cell is 7' X 8'; in terms of square feet, the real ones are nearly four times as large at 10' X 20'. Needless to say, the many amenities that are obsequiously provided to the homicidal vermin at Gitmo are left out of the display. No trace can be seen of the darling terrorists' bedding or toiletries, the free prayer rug and Koran, the three gourmet meals they get every day, the soccer games, the chess, the checkers, the cards, the personal lockers for belongings, et cetera.
You do get to see the orange jumpsuits though, just like at the adolescent spectacles arranged by the communist group World Can't Wait.
On tips from Jimbo and Matt L.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:59 AM | Comments (28)
Liberal Congressman Roots for Al Qaeda to Kill American Official
Hugo Chavez's buddy William Delahunt is spinning like a dervish after wishing publicly that Cheney aide David Addington would be identified by al Qaeda and presumably killed.
From The Politico yesterday:
One of the most curious exchanges in today's testy hearing in the House Judiciary Committee was this exchange between Rep. Wiliam Delanhunt [sic] (D-Mass.) and David Addington, chief of staff to Vice President Cheney.
Addington had acknowledged earlier in the hearing that he took part in discussions with CIA lawyers over the agency's interrogation policies. Delahunt tried to find out what Addington knew about the use of waterboarding on suspected Al Qaeda terrorists, or more specifically, whether Addington knew it was approved as an interrogation technique.
Addington told Delahunt he couldn't discuss specific techniques being used, or even discussed for use, by CIA agents because terrorists may be watching his appearance and would gain insight into what U.S. intelligence agents are up to.
"You kind of communicate with Al Qaeda if you do. I can't talk to you because Al Qaeda may watch C-SPAN," Addington said.
Delahunt responded: "I'm sure they are watching. I'm glad they finally have a chance to see you, Mr. Addington, given your penchant for being unobtrusive."
Addington responded sarcastically, "Yeah, I'm sure you're pleased." Clearly he took Delahunt's comment to mean that the liberal Congressman wanted him rubbed out by terrorists. But no, no, not at all:
Delahunt said he was just trying to express that he was glad to see Addington. Delahunt said he recalls saying "I," not "they," during the testimony — though the video, broadcast on C-SPAN, shows he was talking about Al Qaeda.
Good thing liberals have such dominance over the media. Otherwise the existence of video would be a real problem for them.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:14 AM | Comments (22)
Mike Klonsky Joins the Crowd under Obama's Bus
Another militant kook has joined the crowd under Obama's bus. Gateway Pundit reports:
Mike Klonsky, the Maoist Hardliner, Obama supporter and former best friend of the Weatherman terrorist group founders William Ayers and Bernadine Dohrn, received a $175,000 grant from the William Ayers/Barack Obama-led Annenberg Challenge to run the Small Schools Workshop.
Klonsky belonged to the Students for a Democratic Society (SDS) and was best friends with William Ayers and Bernadine Dohrn who later became famous for their acts of terrorism when the SDS broke up and the Weathermen terror group was formed.
Between 1979 and 1981, Communist Party (Marxist-Leninist) (CPML) chairman and Obama supporter Mike Klonsky was repeatedly feted with state-dinner-level visits to Beijing.
Unsurprisingly, Klonsky was such a big supporter of Obama, he had a community blog on BHO's official website — until the other day, when he was airbrushed out of existence, just like a disfavored party member in the late and lamented (by moonbats) Soviet Union.
No doubt Klonsky was not the Maoist maniac Obama knew. As history aficionados may recall, Mao managed to kill more of his own people than any other tyrant in human history. But 77 million deaths is just a statistic — the real crime is that if fellow travelers like Klonsky don't stay in the closet, they could stand in the way of the Obamessiah taking power. So under the bus he goes, to join Jeremiah Wright, Tony Rezko, Trinity United, the New Black Panthers, Detroit area Muslims, BHO's white granny, et al.
The Jawa Report is right; Obama needs a bigger bus. Here it comes now:
On tips from Burning Hot and Rev. Right.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:14 AM | Comments (8)
Airstrip One Bans Winning at Soccer
Moms love to send their tykes out to play soccer because it's so harmless. The kids run around on the grass kicking at a ball until they run out of gas without any danger of getting beaned with a baseball or bruising their knees on a basketball court. But not even soccer is safe enough for the Nanny Nazis running Airstrip One, because it leaves children at the mercy of the "pressure of winning." Consequently, competitive leagues have been banned:
Under-eight teams will be stopped from taking part in knockout tournaments where cups and medals can be won, and no results will be publicised for any matches.
Junior teams across Britain will have to adopt the new policy from the start of the 2008/9 season in September.
It means that managers will no longer be able to publish the under-eight league results, tables and cup competition score lines in the local paper, or pin them up on notice boards in the clubhouse.
One day these kids will grow up to apply liberal politics to sports, so that if one team scores three goals and the other scores one, the points are redistributed for a final score of 2-2. Interest in sports will curl up and die, and competitiveness will be behind us at last. People will get less exercise, but the State stands ready to keep everyone in shape with ever more stringent dietary restrictions.
On tips from mega and Panday.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:14 AM | Comments (20)
June 26, 2008
The Obamessiah Takes on the Bible
Obama's foray into biblical scholarship has inspired some new artwork by HUGH:
Posted by Van Helsing at 11:25 AM | Comments (36)
Founding Father of Canada's Socialized Medicine Rejects the Monster He Helped Create
If we follow Canada over the edge and into the abyss of socialized medicine, it won't be because we weren't warned of the consequences:
Back in the 1960s, [Claude] Castonguay chaired a Canadian government committee studying health reform and recommended that his home province of Quebec — then the largest and most affluent in the country — adopt government-administered health care, covering all citizens through tax levies.
The government followed his advice, leading to his modern-day moniker: "the father of Quebec medicare." Even this title seems modest; Castonguay's work triggered a domino effect across the country, until eventually his ideas were implemented from coast to coast.
Four decades later, as the chairman of a government committee reviewing Quebec health care this year, Castonguay concluded that the system is in "crisis."
"We thought we could resolve the system's problems by rationing services or injecting massive amounts of new money into it," says Castonguay. But now he prescribes a radical overhaul: "We are proposing to give a greater role to the private sector so that people can exercise freedom of choice."
Castonguay has been forced to reverse his views because authoritarianism has made such a mess of healthcare in Canada, people enter lotteries to win a doctor's appointment. Fortunately Canadians are still able to cross the border to a free country, where all you have to do to get medical attention is be willing to pay for it. But if Democrats have their way, that won't be the case for much longer.
Freedom works. Socialism doesn't work. Yet socialism means more power for the authorities, so we will have to keep fighting it off, no matter how many times it has been exposed as fundamentally dysfunctional.
On a tip from Oiao.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:01 AM | Comments (18)
Obama or Die, Obama or Die, Obama or Die
The unhinged cult known as Obama Nation keeps getting scarier:
Barack Obama didn't attend the BET Awards, but that didn't stop attendees from talking about him.
"If we all register and vote, we will have the first black president in the history of America," Sean "Diddy" Combs told the crowd Tuesday at the Shrine Auditorium before chanting "Obama or Die"…
BET recently picked black Nazi Louis Farrakhan as Person of the Year. It has publicly granted awards for beating up white people. But don't hold your breath waiting for Obama to throw it under the bus with Reverend Wrong, Tony Rezko, et al. Violent hatred of Caucasians is rapidly becoming mainstream.
Militant racist Alicia Keys, who holds that Whitey brought about the death of lowlife criminal Tupac Shakur "to stop another great black leader from existing," was also on hand at Tuesday's event:
"Together we can do anything," she said, playing on the Democrat's "Yes We Can" mantra before shouting: "Obama y'all!"
This gives an idea of how pathological Obamania has become:
One attendee used fashion to show her support for Obama. Actress-comedian Kym Whitley, who revealed she'll be appearing in a small role in the upcoming "Transformers" sequel, donned a tight purple shirt that read 'Barack Obama 08' in glittery black letters.
"I don't know him, and he doesn't know me," she said. "But we're gonna make eye contact one day."
At that point, her vacuous life will become fulfilled.
At least the devotion of the depraved entertainment community will help dissuade the handful of sane people who might otherwise be misled into voting for BHO. Unfortunately, moonbattery has progressed to the point that sane people no longer seem to constitute a majority.
Hat tip: Cristy Li; on a tip from Matthew O.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:23 AM | Comments (15)
Madhouse Madison Considers Ban on Drive-Through Windows
Madison, Wisconsin — which competes with Ann Arbor for the title of the Berkeley of the Midwest — has solved both high gas prices and the imaginary global warming crisis in a single blow: by proposing a ban on drive-through windows.
Explains Eric Sundquist of the Madison Plan Commission, who doesn't want to permit a new Starbucks to have a drive-through window:
Given the concern about all the carbon going into the atmosphere, I'm not sure we should be building more places for people to sit idling in their cars.
With enough restrictions, we'll be forced to get out of our cars and go inside to get coffee, thus lowering carbon emissions, cutting gasoline usage, and striking a blow against "America's auto-centric lifestyle." Where would we be without authoritarian bureaucrats?
On tips from mega, Lyle, Todd D, John H, and Steve.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:52 AM | Comments (7)
Obama's True Faith: Hanumanism
At last we know the truth about the Obamessiah's religion. He's not a Muslim (anymore), certainly not a Christian, and not even a true follower of the sociopathic cult called Black Liberation Theology. Apparently BHO worships Lord Hanuman, the Hindu monkey god.
NEW DELHI: Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama can now expect help from an unexpected quarter — Lord Hanuman.
All-India Congress Committee member Brij Mohan Bhama has organised a 11-day religious ceremony at Karol Bagh here for his success in the U.S. elections.
The idea of sending an idol of Hanuman dawned on him after friends in the United States mentioned a "prominent American politician who carried a miniature Hanuman idol in his pocket for luck," Mr. Bhama said speaking on the first day of the ceremony on Tuesday. […]
"We will ensure that Mr. Obama receives the idol by August 24, a day before the Democratic National Convention in Denver, Colorado," said Mr. Bhama.
Yet Obama's supporters get bent out of shape when anyone mentions his resemblance to another famous monkey, Curious George. Good thing Obama looks more like Curious George than Hanuman:
On a tip from Burning Hot.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:24 AM | Comments (9)
Judicial Moonbats Cannot Distinguish Monkeys from Humans
Judicial moonbattery continues to tailspin through self-parody and into outright insanity:
Spanish apes are one step closer to receiving the same rights to life and freedom humans have. The environmental committee of Spain's parliament approved resolutions that urge the European country to comply with the Great Apes Project — a plan developed by philosophers and scientists who say the animals deserve the same rights as their closest genetic relatives, the Reuters news agency reported.
If illegal aliens and even foreign terrorists deserve the same rights as American citizens, then why not?
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:44 AM | Comments (6)
Dems Force Intelligence Agencies to Waste Time on Global Warming Farce
The next time Muslims launch a major terror attack, people will inevitably ask again, why didn't the intelligence community connect the dots? The answer: because they were too busy defending Americans against their own breath.
CO2 is a harmless gas produced by all human activities, including breathing, that is highly beneficial to plant life. It's been found that when our perpetually changing climate warms, there follows a rise in CO2 levels, because the warmth allows for more life, which creates more CO2. Yet liberal ideology dictates that CO2 is bad, so our intelligence agencies have been tasked with investigating the imaginary global warming crisis it has supposedly caused. From yesterday's The Corner:
This morning, the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence and the House Permanent Select Committee on Energy Independence and Global Warming held a joint hearing on a "National Intelligence Assessment" on global climate change. This analysis was ordered by the Democratic Congress last year and was issued a few weeks ago. […]
In response to a question by Global Warming Committee member Greg Walden (R-OR), the Intelligence Community admitted they had "low to medium confidence" in the accuracy of this estimate because intelligence officers lack the expertise to write such an estimate (it was mostly contracted out to other organizations) and climate change science is so uncertain. […]
Intelligence Committee Ranking Member Peter Hoekstra asked what intelligence was used for this estimate and whether intelligence collection requirements were prepared. National Intelligence Council Chairman Thomas Fingar said no clandestine intelligence was used and that intelligence officers extrapolated what would happen if the "mid-level estimates" by the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change were correct. When Hoekstra asked why the U.S. Intelligence Community would write a major analysis of low to medium confidence that contained no intelligence, Fingar answered, "because you [Congress] told us to."
There you have it — the Democrat conception of national security. Meanwhile, liberals' al Qaeda beneficiaries are busily figuring out how to turn Manhattan into a mushroom cloud.
Hat tip: Michelle Malkin; on a tip from Burning Hot.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:00 AM | Comments (12)
June 25, 2008
Mexican Army Invades Phoenix
Now can we start defending the border?
Police reports show that three men arrested in a Phoenix home invasion and homicide Monday may have been active members of the Mexican Army.
While on the J.D. Hayworth show, Phoenix Law Enforcement Association President Mark Spencer said that the men involved were hired by drug cartels to perform home invasions and assassinations.
The Monday morning incident at 8329 W. Cypress St. resulted in the death of the homeowner. Between 50 and 100 rounds were fired at the house.
Spencer said a police officer told him that one of the men captured said they were completely prepared to ambush Phoenix police, but ran out of ammunition.
He added that all were all dressed in military tactical gear and were armed with AR-15 assault rifles. Three other men involved in the invasion escaped.
Yet there is still no chance whatsoever that this president or our next one will establish control over the border with Mexico.
Whether these particular goons are active duty Mexican Army or not, they've helped make it obvious that the bloated obscenity metastasizing in Washington is not a legitimate government, since it willfully neglects a government's most fundamental duty: to protect its citizens and territory from foreign aggression. It is a gang of vampires that feeds on our money and our votes, nothing more.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:07 PM | Comments (9)
Eco-Missionaries Subject Third World to Moonbattery
Having decided that it would be hurtful to Gaia for the Third World to rise up out of poverty, condescending eco-missionaries have taken their moonbattery on the road to places like Haiti, where the picturesque peasants are expected to generate electricity in an Earth-friendly manner: by pedal-powered generator.
Green Tech Blog gleefully reports
Dissigno works to build businesses with nonprofit groups and communities in Haiti, India, and Tanzania. In Haiti, the company set up a system so that people can rent portable LED lights, which are recharged by plugging into a generator powered by a bicycle-like device, for $2 per month. Kerosene lamp refills, by contrast, cost around $3.50 per month. Six hours of pedaling charges the 12-volt battery. Each 1.5-watt LED light running several hours every night should last a month.
As BelchSpeak points out, that means pedaling 6 hours for $1.50. This comes to 25¢ per hour. No sooner do green collar jobs start to materialize than they are outsourced.
Based in San Francisco, Dissigno is backed by World Bank funding. Capitalism provides wealth where it can be used to create more wealth. International organizations provide wealth were it can be flushed down the toilet in the name of moonbattery.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:22 AM | Comments (22)
Nanny State to Confiscate Children's Incorrect Meals
Britain's totalitarian Nanny State has found a new menace against which to defend its subjects: the lunches parents pack in their kids' lunchboxes.
Under the Government's obesity strategy, all schools will be expected to design a "healthy lunchbox policy" on what makes a nutritional packed lunch over the next year.
Some parents may even be asked to sign a form agreeing to ban unhealthy foods from their children's lunches.
If a packed lunch is deemed to contain too much fat and sugar, parents could be sent warning letters or their children's meals confiscated.
No aspect of human existence will escape bureaucratic supervision and regulation. But anything having to do with children takes special priority, because the State must usurp the role of parents before it can attain the progressive dream of destroying the family, which threatens its absolute hegemony. This is why the government uses your money to pay women to have children out of wedlock.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:36 AM | Comments (6)
Dems Attempt to Greenwash Convention
The Dem convention is still two months away, but moonbat insanity is already choking Denver. Mayor John Hickenlooper has declared that it must be "the greenest convention in the history of the planet" — meaning that every detail must conform to absurd environmentalist ideology.
Greenwashing a moonbatfest of this size entails challenges. Many souvenir goodies will be passed out, and all must be of sound ideological pedigree. Fanny packs and baseball caps that are made of "organic cotton" (as opposed to inorganic cotton) by union labor in the USA are not easy to come by.
Convention organizers have actually hired someone with the title Director of Greening. Her responsibilities include trying to get allegedly biodegradable balloons to decompose by burying them in a compost heap. Under the Director of Greenwashing serves the Official Carbon Adviser, who measures the greenhouse gas emissions of placards, appetizers, and coffee cups.
The good news is that green collar jobs — which Dems have promised in compensation for the millions of jobs that will be lost when they strangulate the economy in the name of the global warming hoax — have actually begun to appear:
Decked out in green shirts, 900 volunteers will hover at waste-disposal stations to make sure delegates put each scrap of trash in the proper bin. Lest a fork slip into the wrong container unnoticed, volunteers will paw through every bag before it is hauled away.
In addition to providing a substitute for useful employment, Dems have also replaced the love of country they hold in such low esteem. According to Hickenloopy, environmentalist tomfoolery is "the new patriotism."
On tips from Varla, Oiao, and V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:04 AM | Comments (17)
Berserkeley Mayor Sides with Treetards
Great news for the hippies who continue to infest the trees by UC-Berkeley's Memorial Stadium in a spectacle that has dragged on for a year and a half. Just when it looked like they might get starved down from their perches, wacky Mayor Tom Bates rides to their rescue.
Preventing ground-dwelling moonbats from providing food and water for the treetards is a no-go with Bates, who proclaims:
To starve people out of the trees does not seem rational.
He didn't explain what the word rational would have to do with Berkeley.
Hat tip: Michelle Malkin; on a tip from Burning Hot.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:31 AM | Comments (13)
Dem State Rep. Gets Nasty in Defense of Child Rapists
Liberals might not have the belly for resisting Islamic maniacs, but they sure aren't taking any guff from 6-year-old rape victims. Democrat Massachusetts State Rep. James Fagan doesn't like Jessica's Law, because it calls for mandatory sentences for child rapists, which New England is notorious for letting off with wrist slaps. His bizarre justification is that harsh punishments for rapists would force his fellow lawyers to be extra mean to their victims.
Fagan makes his case, via The Next Right:
It's so wrong because in these situations … that 6-year-old is going to sit in front of me, or somebody far worse than me and I'm going to rip them apart. I'm going to make sure that the rest of their life is ruined. That when they're 8 years old they throw up; when they're 12 years old, they won't sleep. When they're 19 years old they'll have nightmares and they'll never have a relationship with anybody. And that's not because I'm a nice guy. That's because when you're in court, and you're defending somebody's liberty, and you're facing a mandatory sentence of those draconian proportions, you have to do every single thing you can do on behalf of your client. That is your obligation as a trial lawyer.
Watch him lay on the charm:
Now I get why lawyers are even more unpopular than journalists. What I don't get is why Democrat politicians aren't more unpopular still.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 6:37 AM | Comments (18)
June 24, 2008
Homosexual Mayonnaise Commercial Pulled
When it becomes impossible to stuff any more black people into television commercials, the moonbats who create them will have to move on to another favored group. Homosexuals would seem a natural choice — but the public might need a little more softening up first. An appallingly tasteless mayonnaise commercial featuring men kissing in front of children had to be pulled from the British airwaves after less than a week due to an avalanche of complaints.
Here it is — guaranteed to kill your taste for mayonnaise:
Advertising agencies would be more effective if they focused on selling products, rather than pushing their moonbatty social agenda.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:39 PM | Comments (16)
Justice Department Found Guilty of Discriminating against Wackos and Extremists
Bush's Justice Department is in the hot seat again, this time for having implemented a screening policy to weed out job applicants who are "wackos" and "extremists." Naturally, Democrats are highly displeased to find themselves discriminated against.
A particularly egregious example:
One candidate, a Harvard student fluent in Arabic who was at the top of his class, was put in a "questionable" category evidently because of his membership in the Council on American Islamic Relations civil-rights group.
While CAIR is a civil rights group to Reuters, others know it as a front group for Hamas. Through CAIR, Hamas has set up a legal fifth column, modeled on the ACLU and devoted to softening our resistance to future terror attacks. The operation has admitted that convicted Islamic terrorists were CAIR officials. Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY), no friend of conservatives, has referred to CAIR's "intimate links with Hamas." Even Dick Durbin, the Senator who compares our troops at Club Gitmo to Nazis and communists, has noted that CAIR is "unusual in its extreme rhetoric and its associations with groups that are suspect."
But Patrick Leahy, Chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, appears less squeamish as he righteously intones:
Never again should blatant partisanship be made the crux of the Justice Department's hiring practices … It houses our nation's top law enforcement officers, and it has been crippled in the last seven years.
How the Justice Department has managed to function without being infiltrated by Hamas is anyone's guess. But not to worry: Democrats will soon put it to rights.
On tips from Charles O and hiram13pm.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:23 PM | Comments (7)
Kofi Annan Demands "Climate Justice"
Just when it seemed we had finally heard the last of the corrupt and incompetent moonbat Kofi Annan:
We must have climate justice. As an international community, we must recognise that the polluter must pay and not the poor and vulnerable. […] We cannot allow the extra cost of adapting to climate change to be siphoned off from the ongoing poverty challenge. We should act immediately to provide them with additional funding and appropriate technical assistance.
To summarize, climate justice = international socialism. No wonder they dumped him as head of the UN. If moonbats don't learn not to be upfront about the objectives driving the global warming hoax, they'll scare people into putting up resistance.
On a tip from mega.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:43 AM | Comments (9)
Mark Morford: Moonbat, Bigot, Pedophile
The San Franfreakshow Comical's Mark Morford is even creepier than I knew. In addition to being a farcically slavish Obammunist and an obnoxious bigot, he dwells on the sexual corruption of children with the glee of a second-rate demon. From an old piece he did on sex ed in public schools:
Telling teens to repress their burgeoning beautiful natural chemical lustful cosmic urges that have been only recently delivered to them on the wings of salacious and well-lubed angels is like telling a fervent piano devotee that Mozart is a hack. […]
And oh my great goddess would it not just be goddamn shockingly fabulous if we could somehow be bold and different? If we could, for example and across all of America's public schools, teach the absolute opposite of abstinence? What a utopia we could envision. What a radical and gorgeous and messy and funky and delirious new world we could perhaps slowly, slyly nudge into being. Don't you think?
Which is to say, what if our schools, from kindergarten on, from our earliest textbooks and curricula and chalkboard diagrams, contained unashamed and unembarrassed and all-natural and healthily playful and (as time and age permitted) deeply informative and honest and raw and real information about human sexuality, all woven naturally into the curriculum much like math and reading and biology and revisionist world history and all those lies about World War II and Vietnam and Communism and religion? I mean, can you imagine?
And what if said information was designed to be all about natural, respectful, consensual sexuality, as honest and fleshy and complicated and potentially harmful but as ultimately gorgeous and peculiar and raw as human sexuality is so stickily wont to be?
Would that not, as I truly believe it would, be a major step toward curing many of the ailments plaguing our youth, and, by extension, our culture?
In other words, would a relaxed, sex-positive education planted like a hot seed from a very early age not affect a gradual and rather luscious sea change in the overall sexual attitudes of the culture, much the way you can slowly train the ear to hear nuances in music in or the eye to see the divine in nature the tongue to taste God in a bottle of Lagavulin 16? You're goddamn right it would.
Unsurprisingly, his cheesy, hollow god Obama also advocates sex ed starting in kindergarten.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:21 AM | Comments (15)
Imus Commits Another Thought Crime
After 8 months of banishment for saying "nappy-headed hos," Don Imus has managed to grovel his way back onto the airwaves. But already he's back in trouble for saying something insensitive:
Imus and sportscaster Warner Wolf were addressing Dallas Cowboys football star Adam "Pacman" Jones' involvement in a fight at a Las Vegas nightclub last year that led to a shooting. Jones, who was not accused of the shooting, was suspended for the 2007 season.
When Wolf said Jones had been "arrested six times since he was drafted by Tennessee in 2005," Imus responded by asking "What color is he?"
"He's African-American," Wolf said.
"Well, there you go," Imus said.
Al Sharpton, who has become the ultimate moral authority on all things racial by getting people killed with his race-baiting, darkly intones that he finds this "disturbing because it plays into stereotypes."
Like everything else deemed unspeakable according to the dogma of political correctness, Imus's comment wouldn't be controversial if it weren't valid. Imagine how this scenario would play out if Jones were Chinese. People would go, "huh?" and the show would move along.
Here's how Imus is attempting to spin it:
I meant he was being picked on because he's black.
Actually, it appears that what he meant is that a lot of black people play the race card when they get into trouble. But being a creature of the MSM, Imus wasted no time slipping on his kneepads.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:54 AM | Comments (5)
New Additions to Obama's National Security Team
In the aftermath of likely National Security Adviser Richard Danzig's announcement that Winnie the Pooh is "a fundamental text on national security," Obambi continues to assemble his national security team:
Compliments of Lyle.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:50 AM
Phony Amazon Find Is Moonbattery in a Nutshell
Phony and insane — these two words best sum up the liberal point of view, as demonstrated perfectly by the story of a recently "discovered" tribe of Amazon savages:
They are the amazing pictures that were beamed around the globe: a handful of warriors from an 'undiscovered tribe' in the rainforest on the Brazilian-Peruvian border brandishing bows and arrows at the aircraft that photographed them.
Or so the story was told and sold. But it has now emerged that, far from being unknown, the tribe's existence has been noted since 1910 and the mission to photograph them was undertaken in order to prove that 'uncontacted' tribes still existed in an area endangered by the menace of the logging industry.
The phony discovery was publicized by José Carlos Meirelles of the Brazilian National Indian Foundation, aka Funai, who like many moonbats wants civilization curtailed and Stone Age barbarism to be given another chance. Meirelles describes his spotting the savages from an airplane:
When I saw them painted red, I was satisfied, I was happy. Because painted red means they are ready for war, which to me says they are happy and healthy defending their territory.
Just when it seems nothing could lift the pall of gloom that hangs over liberals, they find something to cheer them up: cavemen on the warpath. But the savages themselves might be even happier if treated to a decent meal and a trip to the dentist.
Like the lies generated by the global warming hoax, the point was to advance a left-wing agenda:
Survival International, the organisation that released the pictures along with Funai, conceded yesterday that Funai had known about this nomadic tribe for around two decades. It defended the disturbance of the tribe saying that, since the images had been released, it had forced neighbouring Peru to re-examine its logging policy in the border area where the tribe lives, as a result of the international media attention. Activist and former Funai president Sydney Possuelo agreed that — amid threats to their environment and doubt over the existence of such tribes — it was necessary to publish them.
But the revelation that the existence of the tribe was already established will provoke awkward questions over why a decision was made to try to photograph them — a form of contact in itself — in order to make a political point.
The important thing is that the do-gooders meant well — i.e., they were promoting moonbattery "by any means necessary," as their hero Malcolm X would say.
Here's an alternative plan for preserving the sacred ways of the noble savage: Fence off a few acres of forest, and let pointy-headed liberals live in it without the corruption of any technology more advanced than bows and arrows. My guess is the project would last until dinnertime.
On tips from Oiao, Freedom Now, and Mark L.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:56 AM | Comments (5)
Moonbats Respond to National Anthem
Imagine if a horde of vampires were to creep out from their unclean lairs, set on defiling the innocent, only to be sent into paroxysms of agonized rage with a shower of holy water. A similar scene occurred in Berkeley the other day, when Code Pink and World Can't Wait moonbats were confronted by decent, patriotic Americans. Via Zombie, here's their reaction to our National Anthem:
Maybe there's a solution to the moonbattery that threatens to reduce our country to something sordid and shameful. Just as Dracula could be driven back to his coffin with holy symbols, maybe the anthem could be used to drive moonbats onto college campuses, where they might be contained.
Hat tip: Michelle Malkin; on a tip from Burning Hot.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:08 AM | Comments (18)
June 23, 2008
Obama Dumps His Seal of Arrogance
At last the Obamessiah has been laughed into abandoning his pompous pseudo-presidential seal:
After days of media mockery, Barack Obama has decided to stop using a presidential-looking seal that his campaign designed and affixed to his podium on Friday.
Journalists said the seal, which features an eagle clutching arrows and an olive branch, smacks of arrogance. John McCain's camp had a field day, calling the seal "laughable, ridiculous, preposterous and revealing — all at the same time."
The seal was conspicuously missing from Obama's lectern when he spoke to a group of women in Albuquerque on Monday. Not surprising, given how much grief Obama took from a normally laudatory press corps after unveiling the seal at an appearance in Chicago on Friday.
"What a bizarre and dumb idea," railed NBC political director Chuck Todd. "It really feeds the arrogance narrative."
By now we know that Snobama's arrogance narrative doesn't need feeding. But he's got to have some kind of seal, to help his cult pretend he's a grownup. Right Wing News offers a few possibilities, including these:
On tips from Burning Hot and Oiao.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:02 PM | Comments (20)
AP Wallows in a Parody of Gloom
Republicans hold the White House and there's an election coming up, so naturally the media wants us sunk in doom and gloom — but the liberal tools at AP have gotten a little carried away:
Midwestern levees are bursting. Polar bears are adrift. Gas prices are skyrocketing. Home values are abysmal. Air fares, college tuition and health care border on unaffordable. Wars without end rage in Iraq, Afghanistan and against terrorism.
Horatio Alger, twist in your grave.
The can-do, bootstrap approach embedded in the American psyche is under assault. Eroding it is a dour powerlessness that is chipping away at the country's sturdy conviction that destiny can be commanded with sheer courage and perseverance.
Paragraph after paragraph of misery is heaped upon the hapless reader. We're told that America feels a loss of control.
In case anyone fails to be steered in the right (I mean, Left) direction, we're reminded that we've gone through periods of supposed lost control before — and not to put too fine a point on it,
Each period also was followed by a change in the party controlling the White House.
But until Barack the Magic Negro can save the day by turning the clock back to the 1970s, we have to an endure a world so dreadful that Hollyweird writers go on strike and moonbatty newspapers stagger toward bankruptcy. Also, the weather has allegedly turned against us, New Orleans hasn't rebuilt all its slums, and some airlines charge for luggage.
It's all so awful, there's only one thing to do: stop reading AP.
On a tip from mega.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:29 PM | Comments (12)
Roadside Countermoonbattery
The Casa D'Ice in North Versailles, Pennsylvania continues its roadside battle against moonbattery:
Compliments of Bergbikr.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:59 PM | Comments (4)
Bloomberg Wants Still Higher Gas Taxes
Gas prices aren't too high — they're too low. But not to worry, New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg knows how to fix the problem. Unsurprisingly, his solution is the same moonbats use for all problems: raise taxes even higher.
Bloomie explains his deranged conception of capitalism:
I think he [McCain] and Hillary Clinton couldn't both have been more wrong when they wanted to reduce the gasoline tax during the summer. They should be raising the tax and encouraging people to reduce consumption. The anti-tax people don't like that. But using capitalism to encourage the right behavior is exactly the [right] direction of going. Tax policy is the way government uses capitalism.
Actually, tax policy is the way government perverts, distorts, corrupts, and suppresses capitalism.
Remarks taxpayer Les Cox, interviewed at a Harlem gas station:
Bloomberg's a billionaire and has no idea what it's like out here.
The problem with us little people is that we don't want to let our betters decide how we should behave and what it's best for us to pay.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:21 AM | Comments (25)
Rockland County Moonbats Wig Out over Mug Shot
In Rockland County, just northwest of New York City, a police officer is getting raked over the coals because welfare cheat Shifra Cohen was asked to remove her wig so they could take a proper mug shot. Being Hasidic, Cohen doesn't like taking her wig off in public, and in a country run by moonbats, pandering to the eccentricities of non-Christian religions gets priority over the exigencies of law and order.
Puled Ramapo Supervisor Christopher St. Lawrence, "who has received major political support from the Hasidic and ultra-Orthodox communities":
This was an insensitive action by the police officer. I sincerely hope that the community will accept my heartfelt apologies for the insensitive behavior that occurred.
Local police will now be subjected to "additional sensitivity training on religious and ethnic issues" — i.e., insufferable multicultimoonbatty brainwashing.
Dennis Procter of the Police Benevolent Association describes the officer's offence:
The officer acted with the utmost professionalism and treated the arrested individual in the same manner any person would have been treated during the arrest processing.
The mistake was trying to treat all the criminals the same, when some animals are more equal than others. The purpose of mug shots — to provide a record of what the criminal actually looks like, without wigs, turbans, novelty nose-and-moustache glasses, etc. — is irrelevant in the face of moonbattery:
St. Lawrence said District Attorney Thomas Zugibe told him the photograph of the woman would be expunged and a new photo taken at a future date.
No doubt Muslim welfare cheats will now insist their mug shots be taken while they're wearing hijabs. Dhimmified authorities have already complied with this demand regarding drivers license photos.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:43 AM | Comments (6)
Newspeak Dictionary Update Alert
Here's how Merriam-Webster defines the term brainstorming:
a group problem-solving technique that involves the spontaneous contribution of ideas from all members of the group; also : the mulling over of ideas by one or more individuals in an attempt to devise or find a solution to a problem
In short, it means thinking — so naturally British authorities have banned it on grounds of political incorrectness. According to bureauweenies, "the word brainstorming might offend mentally ill people and those with epilepsy."
Intones a spokesman for Tunbridge Wells Borough Council in Kent:
We take diversity awareness very seriously. The majority of staff have taken part in training and been asked to use the term thought showers.
All copies of the Newspeak dictionary are to be updated at once. Cross out brainstorming, add thought showers.
On a tip from wz.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:09 AM | Comments (11)
Obama Told Campaign Worker to Shut Up about Che Flag
Remember Maria Isabel, the Obama campaign worker with a fondness for flags glorifying communist executioner Che Guevara? Here she is nestled in a little shrine to psychotic moonbattery:
The fact that the MSM won't touch her story with a 10-foot pole isn't the only reason you haven't heard much from Maria regarding her beloved Che flags. She says she was told by the Obamessiah himself to keep her mouth shut. Like all the other countless reasons to vote for whomever has the best chance of beating Obama, Isabel's flags have been deemed to be a "distraction."
Hat tip: NewsBusters; on tips from Oiao and Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:03 AM | Comments (2)