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May 13, 2008
Britain's Pagan Prisoners Must Be Allowed Magic Wands
It isn't just Muslims who qualify as special in British prisons. Pagan inmates must be allowed to keep twigs in their cells to use as magic wands:
Officers have been told to allow prisoners to collect and decorate the twigs which they need for their rituals.
No one seems to have thought of the havoc that will ensue if the pagans wave their magic wands and make all the doors come unlocked — or the more likely scenario of a magic wand ending up in a guard's eye.
Hat tip: Ghost of a flea; on a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at May 13, 2008 9:01 AM
Comments
Why not just hand them shivs,shanks or go all the way and give out knives!
Posted by: Anonymous at May 13, 2008 10:16 AM
Will the inevitable stabbing a guard in the eye be explained away as a "magic ritual?"
Posted by: Pam at May 13, 2008 10:32 AM
Maybe while all the Moslem inmates are lining up for their halal meals, the pagan inmates can attack them with magic twigs!
Posted by: mega at May 13, 2008 11:03 AM
If you throw a bucket of water on the prisoners do they melt? "Im melting... Im melting... "
Posted by: Anonymous at May 13, 2008 11:07 AM
Erm, no athames (ritual knives)? Tools serve to frame and focus the mind; they aren't absolutely necessary. Not if the need is great and the effort real.
Posted by: comet at May 13, 2008 1:14 PM
Just in time for election season - whoo, whoo
The return of the Fat Ugly Condescending Kook of Erring Remarks, Michael Moore.
Drum Roll............. Remake of 9/11
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/entertainmentnewsbuzz/2008/05/cannes-08-micha.html
Posted by: Oiao at May 13, 2008 2:16 PM
I hope they don't give them brooms. They might fly over the prison walls and escape.
Posted by: Stogie at May 13, 2008 2:16 PM
"Will the inevitable stabbing a guard in the eye be explained away as a "magic ritual?"
Posted by: Pam at May 13, 2008 10:32 AM
Isn't "Free Speech" the standard here and in the UK too? Of course only if you are "special"!!!!
Posted by: HoosierArmyMom at May 13, 2008 2:44 PM
The pagans are going to need their magic wands to cast spells on their jihadi cell mates.
Posted by: forest at May 13, 2008 3:03 PM
I am one of the worshippers of Gun. (We call ourselves Sons of Gun.) We must have firearms - and they must be loaded - or we are in danger of the worst of fates; going straight to Tyranny.
Posted by: Jimbo at May 13, 2008 4:47 PM
OT
He probably shoulda just bought an SUV. Could've saved some trees or owls or something.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/1951848/Paul-McCartney-'horrified'-as-his-eco-car-is-flown-7,000-miles-from-Japan.html
Posted by: mega at May 13, 2008 5:33 PM
God bless those Pagans.
Posted by: Homer Simpson at May 13, 2008 6:25 PM
The pagens will soon have a 95 year old war vet in the cell beside them because the poor old blind guy accidently put the wrong jar in the wrong recycle bin and the trash police in the nanny state are gonna refuse to pick up his garbage if he disobeys their directives again.
http://michellemalkin.com/2008/05/13/recycling-tyranny-of-the-day/
Posted by: wz at May 13, 2008 8:16 PM
This is some more background on the topic of UK and prisions.
A thief (with a 12 year sentence) escaped from an open jail only to return to three days later and implore prison staff to take him back in.
But a prison officers' leader recently said jails had become so comfortable that some inmates were ignoring chances to escape.
They even get Magic Wands.....
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/1951959/Thief-escapes-prison%2C-then-begs-to-return.html
Posted by: Oiao at May 13, 2008 9:57 PM
Maybe the new "Titan" prisons that they are going to build over here should be called "Hogwarts" ;)
The first people I would put in them would be the local council chiefs who refused to empty a WWII war veteran's bin because he mixed up glass and plastic.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=566159&in_page_id=1770
What is the UK coming to???
Posted by: essemess at May 14, 2008 5:33 AM
Maybe the pagan prisoners would help us cast a spell on this blog. You know, any liberal trolls who log in and start to type a comment get's a jolt from their keyboard, or just can't type anything but compliments about Mrs. Reagan or something like that!!! *giggling*
Posted by: HoosierArmyMom at May 15, 2008 1:50 PM
