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May 31, 2008

Banned in Britain: Doormats

At last regulations are protecting citizens of Airstrip One from the menace of doormats:

Stanley Samuels was dumbstruck when he received a letter from a management company telling him to do away with his doormat because someone might trip over it.
The 79-year-old widower and other residents at Brookshill Gate in Harrow, London, received written notification from HML Hawksworth saying that they are no longer allowed to have front doormats as they are seen to be a trip hazard.
Mr Samuels said: "They hand delivered letters to all of us, they said that if we have got a mat they will throw it away. […] The whole world has gone mad if you think about it, all the things we used to be able to do we are not allowed to anymore."

Although there are few things British authorities won't ban, you'd think they could make an exception for doormats, which so perfectly symbolize the proper role of the citizenry under nanny state fascism.

danger-doormat.jpg
Maybe if doormats were properly labeled…

On a tip from Oiao.

Posted by Van Helsing at May 31, 2008 8:33 AM

Comments

It's almost embarrassing; that we fought two world wars to save these servile pukes.

Posted by: Ricardus at May 31, 2008 8:52 AM

just, wow.

Posted by: Anonymous at May 31, 2008 9:01 AM

Ban gravity.

Posted by: Jimbo at May 31, 2008 10:09 AM

No more being treated like a doormat in Britain...unless you're a Briton!

Posted by: proof at May 31, 2008 12:41 PM

He should just orient the doormat towards Mecca and claim it's a prayer rug; that'll shut up the bureaucrats. What, you're saying I can't pray to Allah on my front porch? Die, infidel!!!

Posted by: PabloD at May 31, 2008 1:01 PM

He should just orient the doormat towards Mecca and claim it's a prayer rug; that'll shut up the bureaucrats. What, you're saying I can't pray to Allah on my front porch? Die, infidel!!!
Posted by: PabloD at May 31, 2008 1:01 PM

PabloD, you nailed it. That, my friend, results in the clash of moonbattery.

Posted by: Lyle at May 31, 2008 6:02 PM

Man, you Brits have opened up the Pandora's box of tyranny. All kinds of ugly stupid little monsters come out of there. Hard to get that thing closed again, isn't it.

Posted by: Kevin R at May 31, 2008 6:40 PM

Too bad I'm on the other side of the pond... I loan the old fella my masonry bits and give him a few lag-bolts. I suppose they'll have him remove his lower door-jamb as well, since it's a greater tripping hazard...

...but then that would ruin his green-friendly weatherproofing...

Is there a hierarchy chart somewhere to show which forms of moonbattery trump others? like rock-paper-scissors? Muslim-safety-gay-green-welfare? Something like that?

Posted by: hiram13pm at May 31, 2008 7:44 PM

OT -

Bush Derangement Syndrome in the UK at root of Police stopping two Christian Preachers from handing out ligature in Muzloooooooooooooom neighborhood.

They were in one of those ‘no-go’ zones of the UK where only Muzlooooooooooooooms rights are adhered to.

Christian preachers face arrest in Birmingham

Posted by: Oiao at June 1, 2008 7:58 AM