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February 12, 2008
Colonization the Easy Way
Have civilizations ever before been so deranged as to finance their own obliteration through colonization? News of the World illustrates why there won't always be an England:
UNEMPLOYED scrounger Mohammed Salim is getting the state to pay for him, his wife and their ELEVEN kids — because he can't be bothered to go to work.
He quit his £27,000 job teaching maths and science three years ago and is BETTER OFF claiming £29,096 a year in benefits.
And he has much more time to devote to his Islamic political party — which ATTACKS the British government, even though this country gives his family their food, clothes and house for free.
Mohammed is also busy planning his TWELFTH baby with wife Noreen, 35, but has no plans to get a job.
Salim prefers to stay home because he didn't like the commute to his teaching job.
The family we're all supporting live in a comfy five-bedroom house on a quiet street in Rochdale, Gtr Manchester. They get £19,000 a year Jobseeker's Allowance, £6,600 Child Benefit, £2,496 free school meals and £1,000 Council Tax Relief.
They have a minibus to swan around in, two TVs and a computer, plus a garden full of brightly-coloured toys. Noreen has never worked since marrying Mohammed — who is her cousin — when she was 16.
Consanguinity is very common among Pakistanis and often leads to birth defects that place a crippling burden on the taxpayer-financed healthcare system.
Salim tried using condoms once, but…
Never again, it's nothing like the real thing. It's up to God whether we have any more kids.
His only regret is that the state won't pay for his massive family's college educations. But by the time they're old enough, it probably will.
Like most people in Britain with large families, Salim was born in Pakistan. He spends his time running his political party, Long Live Islam. Once he ran for office and received less than 1% of the vote. Now he no longer believes in British democracy, but doesn't want to go back to Pakistan, because
I don't think we would be able to have the quality of life we have here.
Not even if he got a job. But then, he has a job: to obliterate England. For his service in this cause, the British government pays him well.

On a tip from Gore blimey, the sky is falling.
Posted by Van Helsing at February 12, 2008 7:16 AM
Comments
Dammit! It's just like you racist bigots to demonize immigrants this way! Our political future depends on our party pandering to illegal immigrants even more than the Democrats! We should encourage illegal immigrants to come here and breed like squirrels! Where are my strawberries?
Posted by: John McCain at February 12, 2008 7:33 AM
This calls for the mighty heroes from the LAAF to crush the infidels!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0bjH1YHxA4&feature=related
Posted by: Doug at February 12, 2008 8:23 AM
Beautiful, fuckin beautiful.
Posted by: UCA at February 12, 2008 11:47 AM
Nothing's richer than the irony of watching the citizens of the greatest colonial empire on Earth, allow their country, itself to be aggressively colonized by third-world degenerates....and with their eyes wide open.
Posted by: Ed at February 12, 2008 11:50 AM
these kids already look like the product of inbreeding.better get one of those serogates for the next dozen.
Posted by: christine B. at February 12, 2008 1:14 PM
A suggestion to the Brits:
LET THE DEPORTATIONS BEGIN!
Posted by: Anonymous at February 12, 2008 1:46 PM
"His only regret is that the state won't pay for his massive family's college educations."
How smart do you have to be to sign an unemployment check?
Posted by: KHarn at February 12, 2008 3:23 PM
What do they need college educations for? They won't have to work!
Posted by: ent at February 12, 2008 5:52 PM
John McCain (first post): Good one! And we can hear those ball bearings going "clackety-clack" while the search for the missing strawberries continues, and our nation, like Great Britain, is subsumed in illegal immigrants looking for the "good life" (i.e., sucking the government teat, no work, no need to even look for a job -- and what a horror if you should actually find one; what do you do then? -- pop out those anchor babies as fast as possible, whine and moan each and every time you don't get whatever luxury it is that you want -- "need" has nothing to do with it -- and all the time, 24/7/365, hate and denigrate the country and the people providing you with your "good life").
A recipe for disaster if there ever was one. National suicide by colonization (Assimilation? What the f**k is assimilation?). No matter the nominee, of either party, this is now where we're all headed, folks -- time to wake up and fight back (A little revolution being good for the soul). Elect conservatives to House and Senate posts, before Conservatism is outlawed (and it won't be long)!
Posted by: jc14 at February 12, 2008 7:19 PM
Do you remember the good old days when enemies of the state were actually jailed and executed? Its a pity I never got to live them...
Posted by: conservativeteens at February 12, 2008 10:47 PM
"Do you remember the good old days when enemies of the state were actually jailed and executed?"
Yeah I remember, we called it "fascism" then. Nowadays, dipshits like you call it "patriotism".
Posted by: hashfanaticFAN at February 13, 2008 8:27 AM
Like most moonbats, you haven't an effen clue what "fascism" means. But if it makes you feel better...
Posted by: JamesB at February 13, 2008 9:30 AM
I swear the kid in the back with the white shirt is Lurch!
Posted by: baldeagle390 at February 13, 2008 10:43 AM
The one with the pink hood is hash.
Posted by: UCA at February 13, 2008 11:25 AM
Wow, Slim's wife is a real babe. Fertile, too!
Posted by: Mockinbird at February 13, 2008 11:38 AM

