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December 31, 2007
Moonbat Choice for Texan of the Year
If you think Vladimir Putin was a lame choice for Person of the Year, how about the Dallas Morning News's Texan of the Year?
It is … drumroll, please … The Illegal Immigrant!
If liberal newspapers had been around to facilitate Rome's decline and fall, The Visigoth would have competed with The Vandal for Roman of the Year.
Hat tip: Freedom Folks, on a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 1:43 PM | Comments (6)
Iran Borrows Propaganda From Parody Site
The great thing about people with no sense of humor is that they're so much fun to laugh at. This is the redeeming quality of Muslims, particularly the aggressively terrorist variety running Iran. Look what Mahmoud Imanutjob et al. put up on their propaganda website:
The picture, intended to prove how nice Muslim extremists are to Jews, is a photoshop swiped from a parody on the recommended site The People's Cube.
 Original |
 Photoshop |
At least at al-Reuters, they make their own photoshops.
On a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:31 PM | Comments (1)
Moonbat Lawyer Keys Marine's Car
A Chicago lawyer named Jay Grodner thanked Marine Sergeant Mike McNulty for his service to our country by keying his car. But his head is still attached to his shoulders — a testament to Marine discipline.
McNulty's car was readily identifiable as a Marine's by the military plates and various decals. When caught red-handed, Grodner responded by denouncing America's armed forces. His juvenile vandalism caused $2,400 in damage — eight times the amount required to qualify as a felony.
But at least Grodner has a defense. He says he's being framed because he's Jewish.
Appallingly, Illinois authorities leaned on McNulty to drop the matter if Grodner paid the $100 deductible. McNulty was willing to accept probation for Grodner, but the lawyer refused, knowing that the Marine will have a hard time appearing in court after he is shipped back to Iraq in the near future. As he proclaimed:
I'm not going to make it easy on this kid.
Apparently the vandal will get off with no penalty whatsoever — other than having to see Jay Grodner when he looks in the mirror.
On tips from V the K, Hope Angel and Conan.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:33 AM | Comments (13)
Chelsea Clinton Gives 9-Year-Old Journalist the Brush-Off
Chelsea showed she's a real Clinton when fourth-grader Sydney Rieckhoff of Cedar Rapids attempted to interview her for the Scholastic News:
Q: Do you think your dad would be a good "first man" in the White House?
A: I'm sorry, I don't talk to the press and that applies to you, unfortunately. Even though I think you're cute.
Don't just stonewall. Do it condescendingly. That's the Clinton touch.
Nonetheless Sydney's mom plans to caucus for Shrillary, on the grounds that "it's time we have a female president." Good thing it's too late for Ethel Rosenberg or Lizzie Borden to run — both satisfied Shrillary supporters' primary criterion.
On a tip from Mike H.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:07 AM | Comments (19)
Euthanasia: Fun for the Whole Family
One problem with spending their entire lives in left-wing echo chambers is that the liberal elite have no idea how morally depraved they sound to normal people. Here's medical ethicist Judith Lee Kissell explaining why children should participate in the process of killing off sick relatives who are financially burdensome:
…children can be led to realize early the wisdom of terminating lifesaving or life-preserving treatment of disabled siblings. Such self-sacrifice from a young member of their own household would provide an invaluable lifelong example of love, devotion, and true family values. Even very young children can understand that medical costs can quickly absorb money that could otherwise be put aside for college education or a family vacation, for example.
Well, we can let your sister live, or we can go to Disney World. What'll it be, kids?
By the way, the Canadian Medical Association is claiming absolute discretion to withdraw life support — and to hell with the wishes of patients or their families.
 |
Judith Lee Kissell can be thankful people aren't euthanized for awful hairdos. |
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:29 AM | Comments (22)
Gore's Apostles Weighing Terror Tactics?
Here's an ominous quote from an entry entitled "Whatever It Takes: Beyond Nonviolence" at the enviropsycho site It's Getting Hot in Here:
We are in critical battle for this planet, and we need to think seriously about doing whatever it takes to stop the actions which are destroying the land and seas (e.g. just the other day BP announced that they are going to commit the biggest global warming crime in history) and contributing to snowballing (or, more appropriately, snow-melting) climate collapse. Are petitions, lobby days, call-ins, protests, and nonviolent civil disobedience enough?
Since these Kool-Aid–guzzlers aren't in a position to inflict the industrial scale violence that accompanies the imposition of totalitarianism, this must be a call to employ terrorist tactics.
One of the commenters babbles about the moral justification of a pacifist involved in a plot to kill Hitler. Let's hope the FBI is keeping tabs on these kooks. As the global warming sham disintegrates around them, they aren't going to get any less crazy.
Hat tip: Climate Skeptic, on a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:57 AM | Comments (7)
Worst Nanny of 2007
Citizens, exercise what's left of your power by voting at the Center for Consumer Freedom for the Worst Nanny of 2007. A few of the candidates:
- Michael Jacobson, Executive Director of the Center for Science in the Public Interest, who has campaigned to prevent us from consuming Chinese take-out, margarine, quesadillas and caffeine.
- Putnam County, New York Office for the Aging, which tried to forbid the elderly from eating donuts.
- Meme Roth, deranged "obesity activist," who denounced the Keebler Elves, the Girl Scouts and Santa Claus; who had to be physically restrained from attacking a YMCA snack table; and who publicly affirmed that "eating a cupcake is the same as putting a gun in your mouth."
- Thomas Frieden, commissioner of NYC's Department of Health and Mental Hygiene, who spearheaded the authoritarian jihad against trans fat.
- Dan Kinburn, a lawyer with PETA-affiliated Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, who has been encouraging John Edwards types to enrich themselves by suing "virtually every restaurant in the state of California that is not serving an all-vegetarian diet" under the state's demented Proposition 65.
Remember what they say on the Left: Vote early and often!
Hat tips: Coyote Blog, Maggie's Farm; on a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:32 AM | Comments (7)
Sex Ed May Start at Age 5 in Scotland
Ever at the cutting edge of moonbattery, Scotland will apparently deal with its stratospheric levels of teenage pregnancy and sexual disease by starting sex ed at age 5, as Barack Obama recommends for American kids.
Dr Charles Saunders, chairman of the British Medical Association's Scottish consultants' committee, has declared that children must be taught about sex when they first start school, so as to "empower them."
Saunders, described as Scotland's most senior public health doctor, wants the kids at age 5 to be taught the "basic mechanics":
It could start off with how babies are made and progress from there.
Maybe Saunders' brilliant approach can be applied to drugs too, by teaching kindergartners how to roll joints.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:54 AM | Comments (1)
December 30, 2007
Token Conservative Drives Moonbat Into Frenzy
One of the many shortcomings of moonbattery is the extreme rigidity of the ideology. In place of the cross-pollination that occurs in an open marketplace of ideas, moonbats have only an incestuous echo chamber, in which their own voices come back at them amplified, driving them ever further into insanity.
At least the mainstream media recognizes the value of retaining a handful of token conservatives, if only as a lame defense against charges of bias. Bill Kristol of the Weekly Standard will reportedly write a weekly op-ed for the New York Times, causing Katha Pollitt at the Nation to cough up a frenetic denunciation just before her head exploded.
After calling him a propagandist, a bully and a thug, Pollitt gives vent to her outrage with a list of unobjectionable opinions that she imputes to Kristol in a tone better suited to accusations of witchcraft. These include:
- American liberals helped pave the way for communists and Islamists to take over Cambodia and Iran.
- The democratic governments in the Middle East — Afghanistan, Iraq and Israel — deserve our support.
- The world would be better off without the terrorist regimes running Iran and Syria.
- Military force is a viable option for curtailing Iran's nuclear ambitions before millions of people get killed.
- Promiscuous sex without precautions is not "a very good thing for the country."
- Attempts by the judiciary to overstep its authority and impose an oligarchy should be resisted.
- Islamic terrorists would prefer that Democrats win our elections.
According to Pollitt, these mild views are so outrageous, they disqualify Kristol even for the intended role of conservative foil on a liberal editorial page. The "fair and balanced" concept hasn't gotten much traction at the Nation.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:04 PM | Comments (10)
Media Ignores Vicious Attack on Pro-Life Demonstrator
A few days before Christmas, 69-year-old pro-life activist Ed Snell was knocked unconscious outside an abortion mill. His injuries included:
multiple trauma, right subarachnoid hemorrhage (bleeding in the area between the brain and the tissues that cover the brain), compression fractures of four vertebrae (T3, T4, T5 and T10), right scapula fracture and fracture of the fourth and fifth ribs.
Until they were finally able to stop the bleeding in his head, doctors thought he might die.
Warner Todd Huston at NewsBusters set out to gauge the mainstream media's reaction — only to find there wasn't any:
And here, nearly 7 days out from this attack, there aren't any accounts of the attack in the MSM. As I searched for the story myself, I found two and only two Internet hits for it. Why the silence from the MSM? Can you imagine the MSM swarm that would have occurred if it had been a pro-lifer that attacked an abortion supporter? The cacophony would have been deafening if a pro-lifer had been the one to get violent.
Further spicing up the story, police initially let the assailant drive off, and even threatened to arrest Snell's friend for objecting to this. Also, a receptionist at the Hillcrest Abortion Clinic responded to a request for a statement by slamming down the phone after screaming:
He got what he deserved! He earned what he got!
Yet the media didn't consider the incident interesting enough to report. It makes you wonder about all the crazy things we never heard about, because they happened before the Internet destroyed the Left's monopoly on information.
On a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:46 PM | Comments (4)
Jimmy Carter on Steroids
Back in 1979, after Jimmy Carter had pulled the rug out from under the Shah of Iran, Islamists seized power and exploited Carter's weakness by invading our embassy and holding Americans hostage for over a year, inspiring the terror war that eventually brought us 9/11. Back when Ayatollah Khomeini was rubbing our president's face in the dirt as a example for the Muslim world, I wished Carter was more of a man. But I should have wished for something else, as I know now that a presidential candidate who is Jimmy Carter but more of a man promises to make an even worse mess in the Middle East.
That candidate is Hillary Clinton, whom Terence Jeffrey of CNS News describes as "Jimmy Carter on steroids." She promises to do to Musharraf just what the hapless fool Jimmy the Dhimmi did to Mohammad Reza Pahlavi, who unlike Pervez Musharraf wasn't the only thing standing between al-Qaeda and 100 nuclear weapons.
Via NewsBusters, here's Shrillary on CNN:
I don't think the Pakistani government at this time under President Musharraf has any credibility at all.
When asked if she is in favor of continued financial support to keep his government from collapsing, at least her answer was free of nuance:
No.
As Jeffrey pointed out to Wolf Blitzer soon afterwards:
Hillary Clinton is basically doing to Musharraf what Jimmy Carter did to the Shah, and the potential consequences are far greater, Wolf. We're talking about a regime that already has nuclear weapons, al Qaeda is already present on the ground there, they have a massive Islamist movement. If we try to meddle too much in their internal politics what we could end up with is our worst nightmare: an Islamist regime armed with a nuclear weapon that's friends with al Qaeda.
But don't go thinking that Democrats learned nothing from the disastrous Carter Administration. It's just that those who did learn are no longer Democrats.
On a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 2:12 PM | Comments (11)
Andrea Mitchell: Bhutto's Death Proves We Need Shrillary
Like all noteworthy events, Benazir Bhutto's assassination was seized on by the mainstream media to promote its left–liberal agenda. According to NBC's Andrea Mitchell, it proves that we need Hillary Clinton in the White House. Here she goes on the Today show, via NewsBusters:
The prospect of a foreign policy crisis immediately transformed the presidential campaign and in the close Democratic race boosted Hillary Clinton's argument that experience, including her own relationship with Bhutto, trumps change.
In reality, Shrillary's limited foreign policy experience has been ceremonial. If you want a woman with real foreign policy experience, draft Condoleezza Rice.
But for whatever it might be worth, Shrillary was pals with her fellow corrupt socialist Bhutto, right? Wrong. Despite her opportunistic and mendacious claims to the contrary, Shrillary hardly knew Bhutto at all.
On tips from Cheetah and Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 1:27 PM | Comments (2)
Shrillary T-Shirts
Regarding the suggestion in an earlier post that Shrillary Rotten fans put this
on a T-Shirt, it looks like they've already thought of it. Also available at Café Press:
Clintonistas should also love the guys' and girls' companion T-shirts to the Hillary Nutcracker:
On tips from Goatlady and Bergbikr.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:58 PM | Comments (1)
December 29, 2007
Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance is a problem encountered by moonbats when their dogma is confronted by reality. For an example, look at the first entry below and compare the title of the article with the first clause:
Does the sea ice refreeze slowly, or does it refreeze at a record pace? Both! Neither! Nonalgorian data does not compute!
It looks like even the folks at The Daily Green have been shamed into changing the title.
As for the ice lagging "behind normal levels," Climate Skeptic points out that it is now exceeding normal levels.
On a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 4:52 PM | Comments (5)
No Free Speech for Shrillary Bashers
ACLU cultists are serious believers in freedom of speech — but not always…
The shirt below, available at Café Press, has incurred the wrath of the militants at Feministing:
Okay, it's not the kindest sentiment. But neither is this:
We're going to have to take things away from you on behalf of the common good.
The comments at Feministing aren't that kind either. Mainly they express outrage that anyone would be sexist enough to oppose Shrillary, when it's obvious that the enlightened must support her on the grounds of her gender. But some also want to shut down the shirt's creator, Right Wing Mike. One who petitioned Café Press to have him censored squeaks:
i normally don't file complaints about things that sort of could be covered by free speech (i'm a card-carrying member of the ACLU), but this guy's stuff really seemed to cross the line.
I'll leave it ACLU members to explain what "sort of could be covered by free speech" means.
Posted by Van Helsing at 4:29 PM | Comments (18)
Marvel Comics Succumbs to Moonbattery
It was bad enough when DC Comics killed Captain America. Now this:
In a move reminiscent of storylines developed during the second world war, the UN is joining forces with Marvel Comics, creators of Spider-Man and the Incredible Hulk, to create a comic book showing the international body working with superheroes to solve bloody conflicts and rid the world of disease.
The difference is, during WWII, the superheroes were on America's side. Now Spider-Man et al. have been shanghaied and must serve with the bad guys in a propaganda war that has as its ultimate objective the enslavement of the entire planet under the flag of international socialism.
I can hardly wait for the Incredible Hulk to start punching people out for driving SUVs, and the Uncanny X-Men to shake down successful countries for massive wealth transfers in the name of the imaginary climate change crisis.
Initially 1 million copies will be handed out to impressionable American schoolchildren for free. The USA is the largest financer of the UN, so "free" probably means that you'll help pay for it.
On a tip from Ian from the EUSSR.
Posted by Van Helsing at 2:03 PM | Comments (13)
WaPo Demands Huge Changes in Every Aspect of Your Daily Life
It's nearly time to stick a fork in the discredited global warming hoax, to judge by its adherents' laughably desperate attempts to generate hysteria. Put some cotton in your ears to protect your hearing, then check out the shrill screechings of Bill McKibben at WaPo.
It seems that creepy Al Gore henchman James Hansen, a global warming profiteer who once hawked global cooling, and who has already quietly admitted that the supposedly alarming temperature stats produced by his agency were inflated, has proclaimed that the upper limit of carbon allowed in the atmosphere is 350 ppm.
This means big trouble — because we've already passed that mark!
Don't bother paying your utility bills. By the time they get around to shutting off your service, the planet will be a smoldering cinder — unless of course we immediately adopt the most extreme measures:
To use the medical analogy, we're not talking statins to drop your cholesterol; we're talking huge changes in every aspect of your daily life.
I added the bold to McKibben's ravings above in case anyone has failed to notice that the global warming hoax is an attempt by the liberal elite to impose totalitarianism.
Here's what happened when left-wing intellectuals managed to impose huge changes in every aspect of people's daily life in Russia:
They did it Cambodia too, after liberals forced an American withdrawal from the area:
The biggest body count was piled up in China under Mao:
Thanks to the noble efforts of communists, there are now 100 million fewer humans generating carbon emissions. But apparently that hardly scratches the surface. The Devil knows what it would take to satisfy the shrill lunatics pushing the global warming hoax.
On a tip from mega.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:47 PM | Comments (6)
Root Cause of Carnation Killings Identified
It looks like the true culprit has been found in the gruesome Christmas Eve slayings in Carnation, Washington.
Michele Kristen Anderson, who had a financial grudge against her relatives, and her loser boyfriend Joseph McEnroe managed to kill six members of her family. The victims were as young as 3.
But those killed were not the only victims. The Seattle Times reports that according to former classmate Jennifer Chandler:
Anderson had been diagnosed with severe anxiety and was supposed to take medication and see a counselor but couldn't afford it.
If only we had socialized medicine, all wacky people would have counselors and medication. Taxpayers can finance anything. Maybe if we mandated counseling for the entire population, and put medication in the water supply, evil would become a thing of the past.
 |
Michele Anderson, victim of our lack of socialized medicine. |
On a tip from John H.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:06 PM | Comments (2)
December 28, 2007
Moonbat Pinup
A little eye candy for left-leaning ladies:
Via WZZO, on a tip from heckrulz.
Posted by Van Helsing at 1:13 PM | Comments (14)
Fox News Coverage Found to Be Most Balanced
No wonder moonbats fly into public rages when exposed to Fox News. The Center for Media and Public Affairs at George Mason University, hardly a conservative outfit, has found that "Fox News Channel's evening news show provided more balanced coverage than its counterparts on the broadcast networks."
The reference is to Brit Hume's excellent "Special Report." Here's a PDF of CMPA's report, which finds:
Fox News Channel's coverage was more balanced toward both parties than the broadcast networks were. On FOX, evaluations of all Democratic candidates combined were split almost evenly — 51% positive vs. 49% negative, as were all evaluations of GOP candidates — 49% positive vs. 51% negative, producing a perfectly balanced 50-50 split for all candidates of both parties.
On the three broadcast networks, opinion on Democratic candidates split 47% positive vs. 53% negative, while evaluations of Republicans were more negative — 40% positive vs. 60% negative.
This must be why DU moonbats who see FNC on waiting-room televisions respond by screeching hysterical demands that the channel be changed. When your whole Weltanshauung is a tilting house of cards, you can't risk subjecting it to balance.
Hat tip: The Jawa Report. On tips from Cheetah and BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:23 AM | Comments (15)
Hindus' Tolerance Causes Them to Attack Christians
It isn't only Muslims and moonbats who have it in for Christians. In India, Hindus do too. Time magazine admits:
On Christmas Eve and Christmas day, Hindu nationalists in the Kandhamal area attacked churches and convents and set fire to houses belonging to Christians, killing one person and injuring at least two dozen more. Since then, more than forty Christian houses have been set ablaze despite curfews and increased police patrols.
But Hindus only engage in vindictive mayhem because they're so tolerant:
Hinduism is inherently tolerant of other religions and allows that they too could be valid alternative paths to enlightenment. Proselytizing as Christians and Muslims do is, by its nature, un-Hindu, which makes a looming battle for Indians' souls look "very asymmetrical," says [Ashis] Nandy [a political psychologist and sociologist at India's Centre for the Study of Developing Societies].
Hey, are they saying that Muslims are as bad as Christians? That's intolerant!
On a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING HOT.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:46 AM | Comments (3)
British Nanny State Demands Sissification of Schoolboys
To comply with the depraved "gender equality duty" that came into force last April, British schools have been commanded to encourage boys to play netball and take drama and dance lessons to ensure they are more "gender balanced."
Mick Brookes, general secretary of the National Association of Head Teachers, has failed to get with the program:
It doesn't make any sense to promote things to boys that they don't want to do, simply so you can tick a box on a form.
But by rejecting freedom and dignity in favor of liberal statism, Britain has elevated boxes on forms to a status far more exalted than the personal preferences of any unenlightened young man who would rather kick a ball around than get in touch with the tender side of his psyche.
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British schools have a mandate to produce more boys like this. |
On a tip from Ian from the EUSSR.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:19 AM | Comments (9)
Burglary Victim Warned Not to Endanger Thieves
A woman returned to her home in Rugby, England after attending her cancer-stricken brother to find that thieves had smashed through a security gate and broken windows to steal a fortune in antiques and other personal items. But when she brought up the idea of upgrading her security to prevent it from happening again, the police warned against it.
Were any thieves to nick themselves on barbed wire, she would face charges for endangering their well-being.
The woman is keeping her name to herself, probably to avoid attracting more thieves. She gasped:
I was speechless — you couldn't make it up. I think these laws show we have gone soft in the head.
Welcome to England under the regime of moonbattery. It's no fit place for law-abiding citizens.
On a tip from Deano.
Posted by Van Helsing at 6:49 AM | Comments (3)
December 27, 2007
Moonbat Journalist Dave Lindorff Fantasizes That Global Warming Will Kill Off Conservatives
The global warming farce veers ever further into the realm of liberal fantasy. Now, according to journalist Dave Lindorff, it will rid America of conservatives.
The area that will by completely inundated by the rising ocean — and not in a century but in the lifetime of my two cats — are the American southeast, including the most populated area of Texas, almost all of Florida, most of Louisiana, and half of Alabama and Mississippi, as well as goodly portions of eastern Georgia, South Carolina and North Carolina. While the northeast will also see some coastal flooding, its geography is such that that aside from a few projecting sandbars like Long Island and Cape Cod, the land rises fairly quickly to well above sea level. Sure, Boston, New York and Philadelphia will be threatened, but these are geographically confined areas that could lend themselves to protection by Dutch-style dikes. The West Coast too tends to rise rapidly to well above sea level in most places. Only down in Southern California towards the San Diego area is the ground closer to sea level.
San Diego leaned Republican in 2004. So did Phoenix, a city with essentially no unemployment that has been growing explosively for years. Lindorff dismisses it, along with Palm Springs and even the liberal college town Tucson, as "right-wing retirement communities," and gloats that they will shrivel up and die from projected minuscule temperature increases that wouldn't be noticed in the Southwest even if they were actually to happen.
Agricultural states west of the Mississippi will supposedly be doomed by drought, while more liberal Midwestern states will be spared.
Lindorff wrings his clawlike hands as he cackles:
There is a poetic justice to this of course. It is conservatives who are giving us the candidates who steadfastly refuse to have the nation take steps that could slow the pace of climate change, so it is appropriate that they should bear the brunt of its impact.
Those who survive Gaia's wrath by escaping to blue states are to be regarded as subhumans with limited voting rights:
The important thing is that we, on the higher ground both actually and figuratively, need to remember that, when they begin their historic migration from their doomed regions, we not give them the keys to the city. They certainly should be offered assistance in their time of need, but we need to keep a firm grip on our political systems, making sure that these guilty throngs who allowed the world to go to hell are gerrymandered into political impotence in their new homes.
Global warming has now degenerated into a sick masturbatory fantasy for ultra-leftists in clear need of psychiatric attention. But even as record snowfall buries Denver, the UN presses forward with plans to exploit the hoax to seize power and wealth.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:31 AM | Comments (33)
Gray Madame Branches Into Kiddie Porn
If New York Times Executive Editor Bill Keller can indulge in treason, why not kiddie porn?
Earlier this month, the Gray Lady's fashion insert T included a shot of model Ali Michael's naked left breast. Michael is 17, and looks 13 under all her ghoulish makeup.
The T insert has been criticized by the Times' own Public Editor Clark Hoyt because it "blurs the line between editorial and advertising." But it has also been credited with improving the papers' sickly stock rating.
If moonbattery won't sell, why not try naked teenagers? Morally, it's a lateral move.
Hat tip: NewsBusters, on a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:49 AM | Comments (5)
Recount: Dems Still Picking Scabs of 2000
Moonbats' morbid obsession with the presidential election they lost way back in 2000 continues. Just in time for the 2008 election, HBO will be airing a "docudrama" entitled Recount, telling the inspirational tale of how a defeated Al Gore tried to seize power with help from Florida's corrupt Supreme Court.
The script was written by actor Danny Strong, better known as the hapless high school nonentity Jonathan Levinson in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Strong is also known as a Democrat supporter, as are producers Paula Weinstein and Sydney Pollack, and HBO Films President Colin Callender. The cast includes Clinton groupie Kevin Spacey, who recently joined the parade of Tinseltown leftists down to Venezuela to kiss the ring of hostile socialist dictator Hugo Chavez.
Events are fictionalized, as they would have to be to serve the liberal point of view. But not to worry — the producers "gave relatives of the main characters small roles to placate their concerns" about inaccuracy.
Hat tip: Free Republic, on a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:20 AM | Comments (6)
December 26, 2007
CNN: We Want Bureauweenies to Fix Our Hapless Lives
CNN's Congressional Correspondent Jessica Yellin reports from the Iowa campaign trail:
[Iowa voters] really take this process as a legitimate experience and feel entitled to ask "how are you going to fix my life?"
Yellin describes this as "refreshing."
Only moonbats would deal with their broken lives by begging the likes of Shrillary Rotten, Barack Hussein Obambi and the Breck Girl to "fix" them. But before you pity the wretched creatures, remember they want your life fixed too — whether you like it or not.
Via NewsBusters, which has video. On a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:29 PM | Comments (4)
Moonbats Invited to Throw Eggs At Hummer
"Peter Antiglobalist" activists in St. Petersburg, Russia, have found a driver willing to let them express their moonbattery by throwing food at his Hummer. Explains a spokesman:
Luxury is a false value, clouding modern society's vision. Advertising posters, TV shows and slick marketing constantly tells us that buying things is the most important value in our society.
Therefore they are going to throw eggs and tomatoes at the Hummer, then sell the vandalized vehicle and give the proceeds to an orphanage. Take that, materialism!
On a tip from Deano.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:27 AM | Comments (2)
Line Between Taxation and Slavery Blurs
The line between excessive taxation and slavery is getting blurrier in Greenburgh, New York, where seniors who can't handle Westchester County's exorbitant property taxes may be granted the privilege of working off part of their tax bill in a desperate bid to hold onto the homes they supposedly own.
As Town Supervisor Paul Feiner is kind enough to observe:
People shouldn't have to sell their house, move away to a place with less taxes, leave behind their family and friends.
The solution: labor for the state at a rate of $7 per hour (minimum wage in New York State is $7.15 per hour).
A similar program in Boulder County, Colorado has more than twice as many applicants as openings. Apparently slave labor beats taking out a reverse mortgage that could result in foreclosure.
Feiner likes the idea of getting tax-slave seniors to work in schools:
If we got seniors working for the schools, there might be a more intergenerational feeling there. It might be easier to pass the school budgets.
In other words, he hopes this will make them more likely to vote for the same extravagant spending that is resulting in them being taxed out of their homes.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:03 AM | Comments (6)
Proof That Israeli Soldiers Are Racists
A Hebrew University graduate student has been awarded a research prize for finding one of the Holy Grails of academic scholarship: proof that Israeli soldiers are racists.
The proof: IDF soldiers deliberately refrain from raping Palestinian women.
Doctoral candidate Tal Nitzan explains:
In the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, it can be seen that the lack of military rape merely strengthens the ethnic boundaries and clarifies the inter-ethnic differences — just as organized military rape would have done.
Raping and not raping are the same. Moral relativism works its moonbat magic once again.
Dr. Zali Gurevitch headed the professor's committee that recommended Nitzan's obscene paper be published. He dismisses the notion that the high moral conduct of the Israel Army could have anything to do with the rape shortage by proclaiming that observers have no right to demand a particular explanation to a given phenomenon.
The good guys might as well give up; no matter what they do or refrain from doing, academia will find them in the wrong.
Hat tips: Chesler Chronicles, The Jawa Report, on a tip from BUUUUURRRRNING.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:32 AM | Comments (4)
Reuters: Illegal Alien Crisis Is Over
First the good news: The illegal alien crisis has been solved, because our economy is so bad, the colonizers are pulling up stakes and heading back to Mexico:
[A couple of Mexicans] are among a growing number of illegal immigrants across the United States who are starting to pack their bags and move on as a crackdown on undocumented immigrants widens and the U.S. economy slows, turning a traditional Christmas trek home into a one-way trip. […] The toughening environment has been coupled with a turndown in the U.S. economy, which has tipped the balance toward self deportation for many illegal immigrants left struggling to find work.
Good thing Dems and RINOs didn't manage to ram amnesty through, or they'd all be sticking around to collect welfare, slowing the economy down even more.
But now comes the bad news: the quote above is from Roto-Reuters, which has no qualms about publishing lies so as to advance the cause of moonbattery. Since the alleged economic downturn is not real, the flow of Reconquistadors back to Mexico probably isn't real either.
In case you're tempted to take al-Reuters seriously, they go on to report:
Other returning immigrants cite a slowdown in the U.S. economy as a factor, and the falling value of the U.S. dollar against other currencies, which has eaten into the value of remittances sent to support families at home.
Actually, the peso has been holding steady against the dollar over the last year. But facts are only facts if they conform to the MSM storyline: Republicans have screwed up the economy, and we don't need to defend the border.
Hat tip: NewsBusters, on a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 8:53 AM | Comments (1)
December 25, 2007
Merry Christmas!
Posted by Van Helsing at 10:33 AM | Comments (9)
December 24, 2007
Shrillary Wrapping Paper
Still wrapping gifts for the Democrats on your list? This might help:
Posted by Van Helsing at 1:48 PM | Comments (14)
Durban II
The United Nations has more on its plate than exploiting the thoroughly discredited global warming hoax to cripple the American economy and expropriate vast sums of loot. There is also the usual business of anti-American, anti-Israel conferences, the most infamous of which took place in Durban, South Africa in 2001. This debacle deteriorated into such an outrage that mild-mannered Colin Powell withdrew the US delegation, and denounced the UN for its fanatical hatred of Israel.
Now UN bureauweenies are planning Durban II. Once again, the supposed purpose is to fight racism, which the UN typically accomplishes by spewing bilious condemnations at the Jewish state.
In 2001, South Africa picked up most of the tab. This time, they want the money to come out of the core budget — 22% of which is extracted from the pockets of Americans. The estimated cost is $6.8 million, putting America's contribution at $1,496,000. That's a steep price to pay to see the lackeys of corrupt dictators throw clots of mud at our country and our ally — though not much compared to what they hope to extract from us through the global warming swindle.
On a tip from Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:23 PM | Comments (2)
December 23, 2007
Spinning Public Transport
In Houston this year, complaints about late buses are up 39%; those involving the behavior of bus drivers are up 43%. Some might attribute this to Houston's obsessive emphasis on politically correct light rail transit having left bus service neglected. But municipal bureauweenies spin it differently:
"We're almost a victim of our own success," said METRO's Raequel Roberts. "We have a much better call system now, so the wait time is less than a minute on most calls.
"So, people realize if I do call, I will get somebody that'll take my complaint. And if you realize you're going to get somebody you're more likely to call."
Bus accidents are up 24%. No doubt this too can be attributed to METRO's success.
On a tip from Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 12:48 PM | Comments (13)
December 22, 2007
Latest Feel-Good Campaign: Bleeding Hearts Against Bleeding
If you don't want to give Africans "the gift of dung" for Christmas, how about tampons:
Reader Matt L. comments:
Nothing wrong with charities, of course… but Tampax to save Africa? The thing that got me was THIS IS THE 21st CENTURY. If your country is so backward and socially bankrupt that you don't even have sanitary napkins, then some stupid feel-good charity isn't going to make any difference. THEY HAVE BIGGER PROBLEMS!
Africa needs non-corrupt governments, they need to forget about insane tribal warfare, they need to eliminate petty warlords, they need to learn about personal responsibility… in short, they need to do what the Pilgrims and settlers and all those folks who had nothing did when they came here.
Early America had no one to send them Tampax or relief packages or government aid or anything else… and all alone they carved out the greatest country on earth. In Africa they have the land, the resources, the labor force and (it seems) a total inability to do anything with it. This isn't the 1800's. They have a wonderful model in the United States to show how it can be done, and yet…
As the saying goes, "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime."
Instead, we're sending them a handout of Tampax.
But since the point of these programs is to help us to feel good about ourselves, it doesn't matter if giving tampons to a region under the thumb of corrupt Third-World socialists is like treating a slashed throat with a Band-Aid. As they say, it's the thought that counts.
Posted by Van Helsing at 11:26 AM | Comments (9)
December 21, 2007
A Rowan Williams Moonbat Christmas
As Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams holds the top rung on the rickety ladder known as the Anglican Church. This year he's celebrating Christmas by publicly debunking various details of the yuletide "legend."
Instead of celebrating the birth of Christ, Williams chooses to nitpick about whether the Three Kings were really kings, whether there were asses in the stable (like there are in Canterbury), whether it was really December 25th, whether there was snow on the ground, etc. Less trivially, he suggests that the conception wasn't immaculate after all.
When it's not Christmas, Williams amuses himself by bashing America, sucking up to Muslims and blaming Christianity for domestic abuse, while the church entrusted to his care swirls down the drain.
On a tip from Wiggins.
Posted by Van Helsing at 6:48 PM | Comments (13)
NYC Cat Policy Suggests Dark Ages Could Be Making a Comeback
Cats were originally domesticated because of their usefulness in holding off the rats and mice that spread disease while helping themselves to our food. The superstitious persecution of cats in the Dark Ages led to the Black Death, which was spread by the rats that cats are needed to control. To this day, cats still perform this crucial function better than any poison or trap — when bureaucrats let them.
The owner's of New York City's countless bodegas and corner grocery stores face fines of $2,000 and more for using cats to keep rodents at bay.
Proclaims Robert M. Corrigan, research bureauweenie for the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene:
Any animal around food presents a food contamination threat. And so that means anything from animal pieces and parts to hair and excrement could end up in food, and that alone, of course, is a violation of the health code.
That is, cats are forbidden because unlike the giant rats that crawl forth in slimy hordes from the city's sewers, they might contaminate the food.
But store owners keep the cats despite the fines, because they also get fined if city inspectors find rat droppings. Since they'll be punished no matter what they do, they may as well keep their stores clean.
The cost of the fines has to be passed along to customers — provided the stores can stay in business. Bureauweenies can come back to collect more fines any time they please. As always, Big Government wins, and the rest of us lose.
On a tip from Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 5:27 PM | Comments (9)
Global Orgasm and Still More Naked Moonbats in the Snow
Nothing astonishes social pathologists like moonbats giving silent voice to their unfathomable foolishness by lying naked in the snow. We've seen them here and here. Here are some more, via Make Orgasm, Not Wargasm:
The picture above accompanies an invitation to participate in the Global Orgasm for Peace:
Orgasm and the sense of well-being it brings — how would the planet be if it felt that good? Couldn't that be one definition of Peace? Practice visualizing the planet experiencing the afterglow of a rousing orgasm and taking a break from daily despair.
What if a simultaneous universal orgasm was timed perfectly with the solstice and the funky energy surge it brings? Could that help move humankind off its sure path to self-destruction?
The universal orgasm is planned for tomorrow at 6:08 GMT. That's actually tonight in some time zones, so moonbats are encouraged to synchronize their watches. Be sure to have plenty of Cindy Sheehan and/or Dennis Kucinich pix on hand to get you in the mood if you're on your own.
And remember, the intention is peace. Think peace. Wish for peace. Come for peace.
On a tip from El Presidente.
Posted by Van Helsing at 4:39 PM | Comments (10)
Huckabee Is Not the Guy for Conservative Evangelicals
Based on a report from Bob Novak, even evangelicals who don't give a hoot about taxes, spending, law and order, or illegal immigration need to avoid Mike Huckabee like the plague — unless they want another Jimmy Carter in the White House.
Judge Paul Pressler, described as "a hero to Southern Baptist Convention reformers," is not backing Huckleberry, and with good reason:
[The Huckster] did not join the "Conservative Resurgence" that successfully rebelled against liberals in the Southern Baptist Convention a generation ago. Criticism from co-religionists stands apart from criticism by the Club for Growth, the Cato Institute and the Arkansas Eagle Forum of Huckabee's big-government, high-tax 10 years as governor. […]
Pressler is known to be concerned that Huckabee plays to the establishment and would be subservient to the State Department and The New York Times. On Oct. 26, John Fund of The Wall Street Journal quoted Pressler as saying: "I know of no conservative he appointed while he headed the Arkansas Baptist Convention."
When viewed not as a governor but simply as an evangelical, Huckleberry is still a liberal. Only favorable treatment by his fellow libs in the media can explain why he is being taken seriously by some as a Republican presidential candidate.
On a tip from Byron.
Posted by Van Helsing at 2:48 PM | Comments (15)
Santa Knocked Unconscious
The War on Christmas just keeps getting uglier:
SPOKANE — A firefighter dressed as Santa Claus was knocked unconscious when he was struck in the head by a thrown object while riding in a truck.
Whatever it was that hit Kevin Smith, 29, left him with a broken nose, two black eyes and a concussion. Smith was riding alone in the back of a flatbed truck, which was decked out as a sleigh.
AP refers to this as an "accident," yet a few paragraphs later admits:
In the past firefighters have been hit with snowballs, bottles and paintballs, but serious injuries have been rare, [Fire Lt. Scott] Himelspach said.
Needless to say, anti-Christmas moonbats deserve nothing more than lumps of coal in their stockings.
On a tip from John.
Posted by Van Helsing at 2:12 PM
Tancredo Drops Out to Save Us From Huckleberry
Tom Tancredo, who was running on the single issue of doing something about the illegal alien invasion, has dropped out of the presidential race and is endorsing Mitt Romney. Here's why:
My fear is that if I were to stay in this race my votes could be the factor in handing victory to a pro-amnesty politician.
Now who could he have in mind? Lettuce McCain has been no friend of border security, but the more pressing threat is the Huckster:
[Tancredo] made plain that he was moved to get out of the contest because he feared the rise of Mike Huckabee, who has taken a less hard-line approach to immigration in the past.
"It was important in making this decision — you bet your life it was," Tancredo said, speaking to a group of reporters and supporters at a press conference.
Tancredo has fought the good fight on illegal immigration. Let's hope Romney carries it forward.
Hat tip: Hot Air.
Posted by Van Helsing at 9:40 AM | Comments (5)
Moonbat Actress Bails Terrorist Out of Gitmo
Liberal elitist Vanessa Redgrave has put some of her riches where her oversized mouth is by bailing a terrorist out of Guantanamo Bay.
Jamil el-Banna reputedly ran a terrorist recruiting cell, raised funds for al Qaeda and distributed propaganda produced by Osama bin Laden, earning him the admiration of Ms. Redgrave, who paid half of his £50,000 bail.
Squawks the Oscar-winner:
It is a profound honour to be able to do this. [The luxurious Club Gitmo] is a concentration camp.
The Pakistani el-Bananas requested asylum in Britain and was granted indefinite leave to stay, but he is not a citizen. Spain wants him on terrorism charges. But it will have to wait until Vanessa is done worshipfully nibbling the funk from between his greenish toes.
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Posted by Van Helsing at 9:06 AM | Comments (4)
Politically Incorrect Spoof Carols Censored
One of the best indications of mental health is a sense of humor — which may explain why everything just keeps getting crazier under our regime of humorless politically correct orthodoxy.
The quarterly magazine Marooned is produced by the Cromwell House mental health facility in Eccles, Salford, England, with an editorial board consisting of psychiatric patients. The winter edition included this gag, entitled "Christmas Carols for the Mentally Disturbed":
No one has a problem with making fun of Christmas, but joking about psychiatric disorders? That's heresy. Squeals Zinette Camille of Manchester, whose mother has had mental problems:
I could not believe what I was reading. I was astonished that it could be so insensitive. […] People with mental health issues have a disability — they are not disturbed.
Instead of the sensible response of preparing a room with padded walls for Ms. Camille, a spokesman for the magazine soon issued the standard groveling apologies. The issue has been recalled, and the offending article removed. They even offered to let the shrill little Nazi sound off in the next issue. An official promises that future editions will be subjected to closer vetting.
Be sure to have a sensitive Christmas, and remember: no laughing in unapproved contexts.
Hat tip: Ace of Spades HQ, on a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:44 AM | Comments (4)
Tweety Blasts Shrillary for Socialist Christmas Ad
You've probably seen the irritating ad in which Shrillary gives us the gift of socialism for Christmas:
To his credit, even the frequently moonbatty Chris Matthews has had enough of this mentality. He opened up with both barrels on Joe Scarborough's show. Via NewsBusters:
I always thought the problem with Hillary was, her notion of government was, "I am Evita, I am the one who gives gifts to the little people and then they come and bring me flowers and they worship at me because I am the great Evita."
"And I give things to people. I give them universal health care; I give them an energy program. I give gifts to the little people. The little people come to me and I give them gifts, like universal pre-K. I am the gift-giver to the little people. Oh, I am the grand, grand woman, the grand Evita. And I give gifts to the little people and they're going to come to me in multitudes and worship at me!"
Give me a break! That's not the transaction. It's our country, it's our government. Public officials get to serve us! They serve us, they are our servants. They are not Evitas; they are not goddesses. We don't look up to them that way. We don't get gifts from them. By the way: we pay for every damn program we get. In fact we pay more for it than we're going to get. What are you kidding: you're going to give us stuff? From where? From your treasury? Where are you going to go? The palace? [unintelligible] The palace? We're going to give them to you?
It's the Hillary, it's the Clinton notion of the political transaction: we are the well-educated, sophisticated, smarter-than-you, better-than-you people and we're going to give you little things for your little needs.
Careful, Tweety. You'll wear out your welcome at MSNBC if you keep making this much sense. Here's the video.
On a tip from Cheetah.
Posted by Van Helsing at 7:16 AM | Comments (13)