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November 13, 2007
British Bean Counters Divert Police from Serious Crimes
To meet quotas set by bean counters, British police have been ignoring serious crimes to focus on those that are easier to solve.
Chief executive of the National Policing Improvement Agency Peter Neyroud explains:
Because detecting a stolen milk bottle counted the same as detecting a murder, you get your points from, not necessarily milk bottles, but certainly in mid-range, volume crime rather than serious crime.
For example, detectives stopped investigating a pedophile ring so they could trap a large number of burglars.
This ingenious approach might also be applied to socialized medicine. By ignoring life-threatening conditions and focusing on paper cuts and head colds, the NHS should be able to improve its cure rate dramatically.
On a tip from Panday.
Posted by Van Helsing at November 13, 2007 7:45 AM
Comments
All crimes must be counted as equal. Why, if some crimes solved were to be given more weight - such as murders - it might lead to the very un-democratic idea that a hardworking billionaire tycoon should have more voting power to choose government than an unemployed, drunken hobo!
Or that people who work hard and save should be allowed to enjoy the fruits of their labour instead of spreading out their income among slackers and hippies!
It would lead to the end of Socialism as we know it!
Posted by: Scott at November 13, 2007 8:03 PM
