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October 16, 2007

California Bans Rubber Duckies

Moonbats may be too oblivious to reality to fear Islamic terrorism, but they're afraid of most everything else — even rubber duckies. The moonbats running California have just banned all toys and baby products that contain phthalates, essentially harmless chemicals used to make plastic pliable.

As the Phthalates Information Center notes:

Regulatory agencies and independent authorities have found phthalates to be safe as used in vinyl products and personal care products. There is no reliable evidence that any phthalate has ever caused any harm to any human in their fifty-year history of use. Phthalates are one of the most thoroughly tested families of compounds in use today. An immense amount of information on their safety profiles is available to users.
The European Union has conducted extensive safety reviews of all the major phthalates, and has found they present no concern to the general public in their current uses. Its reviews specifically cover uses in nail polish and in toys.
The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission has found that the principal phthalate used in toys presents "no demonstrated health risk" to children.

The phthalate ban was sponsored by Assemblywoman Fiona Ma, a Dem from San Francisco, world capital of authoritarian moonbattery, and signed by the Republican-turned-moonbat Governator. Oregon, Maryland, and New York may follow suit.

Apparently the reasoning goes something like, "How do you even pronounce 'phth'? The word looks so unnatural, it must be offensive to the Earth Mother."

Since teething rings tend to be made with phthalates, mothers will have to sneak them in from out of state, or maybe give Baby a block of sustainably harvested wood to chew on.

Perhaps the chemicals industry could avoid other senseless bans with a renaming campaign. By changing "polystyrene" to "touchyfeelene" and "polyvinyl chloride" to "polysexual inclusionide," we might be able to keep these highly useful substances legal.

Banned in California.

Hat tip: BelchSpeak.

Posted by Van Helsing at October 16, 2007 7:58 AM


Democrats hate doggie toys?

Posted by: DANEgerus at October 16, 2007 10:01 AM

Somewhere on Sesame Street, Ernie is crying as the moonbats attempt to take away his rubber duckie.

Posted by: Refuter Of Liberal Vermin at October 16, 2007 10:44 AM