« San Francisco Fourth of July | Main | Jury Awards $6.2 Million For Being Black Lesbian »
July 7, 2007
Campaign Against Shaking Hands
Gayle Westmoreland of Columbia, Maryland is on a mission: to stop Americans from shaking hands.
She's even published a treatise entitled "Hands: Stop Shaking Them! A Cultural Shift to End Handshaking in America!" You see, the custom is "an invasion of your personal space" and also could spread germs, since you never know what other people have been doing with their hands. For example, she used to date a guy who picked his nose all the time and hardly ever washed his hands.
To accomplish her goal of replacing the handshake with germ-free nods, she proposes an annual "government-approved moratorium" on handshaking called "National Shake-It Month." She's also come up with some rousing slogans, like "Hand, hand, fingers, thumb, I don't need your germs or your scum!"
Wonders her friend Francis Beverly:
The government tells us about not smoking and safe sex. Why not handshaking?
Not to worry, no doubt the government will get around to regulating handshaking sometime soon. Westmoreland already has Islamists and public education in her corner.
On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at July 7, 2007 1:29 PM
Comments
"Wonders her friend Francis Beverly:
The government tells us about not smoking and safe sex. Why not handshaking?"
The fact that they actually WANT the government involved in such an asinine campaign speaks volumes.
Posted by: NudeGayWhalesForJesus at July 7, 2007 4:22 PM
Right up the pathologically-lying Islamists'/Leftists' alley. Why make an age-old signification of keeping your word when you just make the rules as you go?
Posted by: Toa at July 7, 2007 5:58 PM
She's also come up with some rousing slogans, like "Hand, hand, fingers, thumb, I don't need your germs or your scum!"
Catchy beat. Must have a ton of friends
Posted by: ToddonCapeCod at July 8, 2007 8:50 AM
