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July 31, 2007

Club Gitmo Vacationer Begs to Stay

Not everyone agrees with Senator Dick Durbin (D-IL) that conditions at Club Gitmo are comparable to those imposed by socialist dictators Stalin, Hitler, and Pol Pot. Vacationing terrorist Ahmed Belbacha is terrified that he'll have to go back to his native Algeria, where mistreatment of prisoners isn't just a canard employed by liberals to slander their country and assist its enemies, but an actual reality.

To his horror, Belbacha has been cleared for release from Guantanamo. He's filed an emergency motion with the US Court of Appeals in DC, begging to be allowed to stay, even though he is incarcerated in "the harshest part of Guantanamo" according to his lawyer.

Why not? Setting aside moonbat propaganda for a moment, the treatment of terrorists there is downright obsequious — gourmet halal meals, free Korans and prayer rugs, opportunities to fling disgusting bodily excretions on the guards with apparent impunity, etc. When trying to come up with something to complain about for a lawsuit, Gitmo terrorist Majid Khan was reduced to whining that he had to use "cheap, branded, unscented soap," and that the balls in rec room weren't inflated to his liking.

But that's unlikely to stop prominent Dems from screeching at the cameras that Gitmo must be closed immediately on the grounds that America is bad, evil, and wrong.

On a tip from MB.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:34 PM

Vegansexuals Refuse Intimacies With Normal People

The latest fad in moonbat-friendly New Zealand is vegansexuality, whereby vegans punish normal people by refusing to have sex with them.

Explained one Christchurch vegan:

I believe we are what we consume, so I really struggle with bodily fluids, especially sexually.

Another elaborated:

I would not want to be intimate with someone whose body is literally made up from the bodies of others who have died for their sustenance.

Chirped a third:

When you are vegan or vegetarian, you are very aware that when people eat a meaty diet, they are kind of a graveyard for animals.

Given the sickly appearance that results from vegans' abnormal diet, it's doubtful they get many opportunities to turn non-vegans down.

On a tip from El Presidente.

Posted by Van Helsing at 3:17 PM

"Transgendered" — Another Word For "Utterly Insane"

A judge has commanded the state of Idaho to provide female hormone therapy to an inmate who castrated himself after prison officials refused to pander to his psychotic delusion that he is actually a woman.

Randall Gammett, who now calls himself Jenniffer Spencer, is in the can for possession of a stolen car and escape. Here's how the Idaho Statesman tells his story:

Born biologically male, she [sic] castrated herself [sic] using a disposable razor blade in her [sic] prison cell after doctors working for the state prison system refused to prescribe her [sic] the female hormone estrogen. Spencer sued the Idaho Department of Correction and the physicians, claiming her [sic] constitutional rights were violated and that she [sic] was subjected to cruel and unusual punishment when the doctors failed to diagnose gender identity disorder and treat her [sic] with female hormones.

Naturally US District Judge Mikel Williams agreed. It wouldn't occur to a judge that forcing the prison system to indulge insanity is not going to stop freaks from being crazy enough to mutilate themselves, because according to our liberal elite overlords, being "transgendered" isn't a matter of mental illness, but rather a sacrosanct ticket to climb aboard the official victim gravy train. (The lawsuit is pending. No doubt Gammett/Spencer will leave prison a wealthy she-man.)

The lunatics have literally taken charge of the asylum.

Hat tip: Clayton Cramer's Blog, on a tip from Steve.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:48 PM | Comments (3)

British Muslims Forbid New Pet Food Factory

British Muslims are now forbidding the construction of a pet food factory near Rugby on the grounds that it will violate their religious rights by possibly producing "pork emissions."

It is alleged that pork particles could rain down upon Muslims if the factory is built. This would result in Allah's displeasure.

A local Muslim adopts the tried and true menacing whine:

In this country we are allowed the right to follow our religion and religious beliefs. By allowing this plan to go ahead our religious rights are being swept to one side for what appears to be economic greed.

Got that? The Muslims colonizing Britain have a "right" to prevent economic activity that reminds them of pork. We wouldn't want the "economic greed" that produces the tax revenues that finance their welfare checks to get in the way of Islamic cultural hegemony.

Butchers Pet Care points out that pork ingredients account for only 10% of their products, that they do not burn animal materials, and that there is an "almost 99% guarantee" that the smell of pork would not reach the residential area. But all this is irrelevant. The point as always is for Muslims to prove that if they push us, we will move.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:32 AM

German Government Promotes Incest and Pedophilia

European civilization is swirling down the toilet even faster than I thought. From a booklet issued by the German Federal Health Education Center (a subsidiary of the German government's Ministry for Family Affairs) pertaining to 1–3-year-olds:

Fathers do not devote enough attention to the clitoris and vagina of their daughters. Their caresses too seldom pertain to these regions, while this is the only way the girls can develop a sense of pride in their sex. […] The child touches all parts of their father's body, sometimes arousing him. The father should do the same.

Another booklet on 4–6-year-olds recommends teaching children about copulation.

The booklets are used for training nursery, kindergarten, and elementary school teachers. Parents who want to preserve their children's innocence by homeschooling them are advised to immigrate to a country where that is allowed. Homeschooling has been illegal in Germany since Hitler outlawed it in 1933.

The same center puts out a book of songs for children 4 and slightly older. One song includes the lyrics:

When I touch my body, I discover what I have. I have a vagina, because I am a girl. Vagina is not only for peeing. When I touch it, I feel a pleasant tingle.

Your tax marks at work, German readers!

Hat tip: Conservative Thoughts, on a tip from The Panday.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:41 AM

Lecherous Jesus

While college students are thrown in jail on multiple felony charges for pranks involving Korans, Hollywood merrily continues a campaign of ridicule against Christianity, which does not enjoy the favor Islam does in our politically correct establishment. The latest assault is The Ten, a comedy spoof of the Ten Commandments, which features a lecherous Jesus who corrupts a virgin librarian.

How daringly provocative, in a vulgar sixth-grade bully sort of way.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:31 AM | Comments (1)

If Homosexuals Can't Sleep Together, No One Can

Yesterday the British government ruled that to comply with the Sexual Orientation Regulations of last year's Equality Act, religious owners of hotels and bed and breakfasts must either allow homosexual activity on their premises, or forbid any guests from sleeping together.

This perfectly demonstrates the liberal concept of equality: in the interests of advancing depravity, an all-powerful intrusive bureaucracy sees to it that if everyone can't have something, then no one can. It's called "social justice."

Not only hoteliers will be affected. For example, if a photographer objects to taking pictures of gay lovebirds smooching, then he can't take pictures of any couples and must switch to portrait photography.

It isn't going to get any better. The Brown government has come up with a new cabinet post, the Secretary of State for Equalities, whose responsibility is to impose authoritarian political correctness on the remnants of British civilization. The first to fill the post is Deputy Labor Leader Harriet Harman, who recently announced at a gay pride event that a new Commission for Equality and Human Rights will "mainstream the battle against homophobia" by ramming the homosexual agenda down the throats of the populace.

Yet many still regard Britain to be a free country.

Hat tip: In the Days, on a tip from Nanc.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:09 AM

July 30, 2007

La Times: Free Johnny Taliban

Incredible. The libs at the Los Angeles Times are actually demanding that John Walker Lindh, aka Johnny Taliban, be let out of jail:

According to La Times, Scooter Libby did not deserve to have his sentence commuted — but the American Taliban does, on the grounds that he joined the Taliban "to fight the Northern Alliance, not the United States" and because:

He never engaged in terrorism; indeed, his commitment to Islam leads him to oppose the targeting of civilians.

Funny, Islam doesn't seem to have that effect on other Muslims taking part in their terror war against the entire civilized world, with the tacit if not explicit support of pretty much all of Dar al Islam.

In case you forgot why this spoilt Marin County moonbat belongs in jail (since it appears a firing squad is too much to ask for), here are a few excerpts from the Grand Jury's indictment:

In or about late May or June 2001, LINDH agreed to attend an al-Qaeda training camp for additional and extensive military training, knowing that America and its citizens were the enemies of Bin Laden and al-Qaeda and that a principal purpose of al-Qaeda was to fight and kill Americans.

In or about June and July 2001, LINDH remained at the al-Farooq camp and participated fully in its training activities, after having been told early in his stay at the camp that Bin Laden had sent forth some fifty people to carry out twenty suicide terrorist operations against the United States and Israel.

In or about June or July 2001, LINDH met personally with Bin Laden, who thanked him and other trainees for taking part in jihad.

After learning about the terrorist attacks against the United States on or about September 11, 2001, LINDH remained with his fighting group. LINDH did so despite having been told that Bin Laden had ordered the attacks, that additional terrorist attacks were planned, and that additional al Qaeda personnel were being sent from the training camps to the front lines to protect Bin Laden and defend against an anticipated military response from the United States.

From in or about October through early December 2001, LINDH remained with his fighting group after learning that United States military forces and United States nationals had become directly engaged in support of the Northern Alliance in its military conflict with Taliban and al Qaeda forces.

Johnny Taliban also participated in a prison uprising that resulted in the death of CIA agent Johnny Michael Spann. Even a merciful execution is really more than Lindh deserves, but our MSM weeps over his unfortunate fate and wants him set free. Apparently it sees a kindred spirit.

Hat tips: Power Line, Rhymes With Right, Jawa Report.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:30 PM | Comments (1)

Progress in Iraq Causing Long Faces Among Dems

Every silver lining has a cloud inside it. The improving situation in Iraq is no exception.

Even the New York Times has acknowledged that the surge is working by publishing an encouraging op-ed by Michael E. O'Hanlon And Kenneth M. Pollack:

We are finally getting somewhere in Iraq[…] In previous trips to Iraq we often found American troops angry and frustrated[…] Today, morale is high. […]

Everywhere, Army and Marine units were focused on securing the Iraqi population, working with Iraqi security units, creating new political and economic arrangements at the local level and providing basic services — electricity, fuel, clean water and sanitation — to the people. Yet in each place, operations had been appropriately tailored to the specific needs of the community. As a result, civilian fatality rates are down roughly a third since the surge began[…]

In Baghdad’s Ghazaliya neighborhood, which has seen some of the worst sectarian combat, we walked a street slowly coming back to life with stores and shoppers. The Sunni residents […] seemed genuinely happy with the American soldiers and a mostly Kurdish Iraqi Army company patrolling the street. […]

We traveled to the northern cities of Tal Afar and Mosul. […] American troop levels in both cities now number only in the hundreds because the Iraqis have stepped up to the plate. Reliable police officers man the checkpoints in the cities, while Iraqi Army troops cover the countryside. A local mayor told us his greatest fear was an overly rapid American departure from Iraq. […]

None of this is good news if you're a terrorist — or a Democrat. House Majority Whip James Clyburn (D-SC) whines that a positive report by General Petraeus could impede his party's surrender efforts. Some Dems, known as Blue Dogs, are still sane enough not to throw in the towel when the country is winning a war it cannot afford to lose. Without their votes, Clyburn grouses, America might prevail:

I think there would be enough support in that group to want to stay the course and if the Republicans were to stay united as they have been, then it would be a problem for us.

Could you have imagined on September 12, 2001, that politicians would more or less openly root for our country's defeat at the hands of Islamic terrorists who prominently include al-Qaeda, and yet not be dragged by their throats from their offices for the tarring and feathering these treasonous lowlifes so richly deserve?

Hat tip: Ace of Spades.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:59 PM

Moonbats Still Insist Global Warming Is Causing Plague of Hurricanes

Despite the high hopes of global warming enthusiasts for another Katrina, last year's hurricane season turned out to be a complete dud. It's looking like this year won't make for much of an apocalypse either. But don't think this will spare you from the Left's tireless propagandizing on the theme of man-made global warming causing hurricanes to be more numerous and severe.

The political hacks on the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change continue to screech that it is "more likely than not" that our refusal to forsake our modern ways is making hurricanes worse.

A new study props up this notion by finding that the number of observed tropical storms and hurricanes has increased over the last 100 years, as has sea surface temperatures (by a less than staggering 1.3°F).

This could be because Al Gore actually has some clue what he's talking about. But I doubt it. It is far more likely due to the fact that many storms went unnoticed until we started using satellites to track them in the 1970s.

More evidence that the world is coming to an end thanks to our power plants and SUVs is the factoid that four of the top ten costliest storms in American history occurred in 2004. If you think this is due to coastal areas having been built up significantly, so that storms don't have to be any stronger to cause much more damage in financial terms, you haven't been drinking your Kool-Aid.

On a tip from Mega.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:11 AM

July 29, 2007

Nancy Pelosi, Beauty Queen

Now we know for sure the world is going insane. The 67-year-old leftist Harpy Nancy Pelosi comes in at #4 on The Hill's list of the "Most Beautiful People on Capitol Hill."

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, somebody had better put in an emergency call to an optometrist.

Hat tip: A Little More to the Right.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:42 PM | Comments (1)

Find the Felony

Via Michelle Malkin, which one of these represents a felony in America:

Pace University student Stanislav Shmulevich knows the answer. He is facing not one but two felony charges for his tasteless prank with a Koran.

His Pace campus is in Manhattan, where nearly 3,000 Americans were murdered by Muslims not so very long ago. Nonetheless, dhimmitude has taken such deep root that the film Obsession, which describes the threat of radical Islamists, could not be shown there.

The purpose of dhimmitude is to subject us infidels to lives of shameful subservience. It's working.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:38 PM | Comments (4)

Keith Olbermann Suggests President Killed Pat Tillman

Whatever psychiatric condition is afflicting shrill MSNBC moonbat Keith Olbermann, it has clearly progressed to the point that institutionalization and heavy medication are urgently called for. His latest bug-eyed conspiracy theory: President Bush and/or the Army had Pat Tillman assassinated.

A piece subtly entitled "Motive For Murder" promotes the theory that football player turned Army Ranger Pat Tillman was not just killed by friendly fire — he was murdered.

Who would do a thing like that? Why, the Author of All Evil, naturally. As Olby darkly intones:

Corporal Tillman held a number of personal views that were unpopular within the context of the Bush Administration, perhaps also within the Army. He reportedly favored John Kerry in that election that year. We know he opposed the invasion of Iraq. He thought it illegal. He had plans to meet with Noam Chomsky.

So naturally Bush or the Army had him offed. As to why Olby hasn't been rubbed out yet for boldly screeching moonbattery to power — no explanation is given.

Tillman turned down a lucrative NFL career to fight for his country. Now his tragic death is being exploited by a talking cockroach in a tinfoil hat who asks us to believe that President Bush had him killed for allegedly voting for Kerry.

If you know anyone who takes Olbermann's ravings seriously, please consider it your civic duty to get them in the care of skilled mental health professionals immediately.

In case you need to see this for yourself to believe it:

Hat tips: Hot Air, LGF.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:48 PM | Comments (1)

Everyone But Dems Agrees: Premature Withdrawal Would Be Disaster

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out that a premature withdrawal of US forces from Iraq would result in a catastrophe. According to a National Intelligence Estimate report:

If coalition forces were withdrawn rapidly … we judge that this almost certainly would lead to a significant increase in the scale and scope of sectarian conflict in Iraq, intensify Sunni resistance of the Iraqi government and have adverse consequences for national reconciliation.

The report added that a John Murtha–style "redeployment" would lead to military intervention by neighboring countries (i.e., our arch enemy Iran), "massive civilian casualties," and al-Qaeda's use of parts of the country "to plan increased attacks in and outside of Iraq."

The Iraq Study Group was risibly naive in many ways, but even it realized we can't just leave:

We believe it would be wrong for the United States to abandon the country through a precipitate withdrawal of troops and support. A premature American departure from Iraq would almost certainly produce greater sectarian violence and further deterioration of conditions.

Unsurprisingly, the commander of US forces in Iraq doesn't see surrender as a viable option. Warns General David Petraeus:

If we pull out, there will be greatly increased sectarian violence, humanitarian concerns. You don't know what could happen in terms of dangerous conflicts, what could happen along the Kurdish-Shi'ite-Sunni fault lines, or how [Iraq's] neighbors will react.

Local Arab leaders agree. Warns Jordan's King Abdullah II:

Withdrawal from Iraq without … preparing the necessary conditions that would ensure a strong central government able to run the affairs of the state … may only worsen the problem and contribute to increasing violence and conflict among Iraqis.

Even Ban Ki-moon, Secretary-General of the hardly helpful United Nations, is showing some sense:

A great caution should be taken for the sake of the Iraqi people. Any abrupt withdrawal or decision may lead to a further deterioration.

In contrast, we have the irresponsible clowns vying for the Democrat POTUS nomination. Bill Richardson, for example, is shouting that he wants American troops "home by the end of this year, in six months, with no residual forces" — consequences be damned.

Given how obsessed liberals have been with shoehorning Iraq into their beloved Vietnam template, they can't be unaware of what will happen if they are succeed in bringing about our defeat. Hundreds of thousands of boat people died trying to escape the horrors of communist Vietnam. The regime executed an estimated 65,000; another 165,000 died in concentration camps. In neighboring Cambodia, the chaos caused by the power vacuum after our withdrawal brought the Khmer Rouge to power — 1.7 million Cambodians died.

But at least in Southeast Asia, our withdrawal didn't result in putting Iran in a position to control the world's oil supply, or potentially providing al-Qaeda with its own oil-rich terror state from which to launch attacks on our homeland.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:11 AM | Comments (5)

July 28, 2007

Fisherman Arrested For Protecting Bait From Sea Lion

Fisherman Hai Nguyen is sitting in a Newport Beach, California jail after do-gooders saw him defending his bait from a sea lion and ran squealing to the police. He will be arraigned on felony animal cruelty charges for stabbing the aggressive beast with a steak knife.

Bail has been set at $20,000. Hopefully catches have been good, because Nguyen could be fined even more than that, in addition to spending up to a year in prison for behavior that until recently would have been regarded as a sensible reaction.

Sea lions are often at odds with people. In addition to stealing fishermen's bait, they leave massive piles of crap all over docks, keep people up all night with their Al Gore–like bellowings, and leave behind horrific odors. Needless to say, our moonbat authorities side with them against the humans whose taxes pay their generous salaries.

Posted by Van Helsing at 12:36 PM | Comments (11)

July 27, 2007

PETA May Buy Penfield Lighthouse For Fish Empathy Project

The 51-foot-high Penfield Reef Lighthouse off the coast of Fairfield, Connecticut is up for sale — and PETA might buy it.

The objective would be to transform this resource for fishermen into the headquarters for their "Fish Empathy Project," featuring a memorial to the countless fish that are callously murdered so that anthropocentric humans can devour their flesh. Also, there will be a cafe serving faux fish sticks, in case anyone who just happens to be swimming past the treacherous reef gets a craving for some artificial food.

Michael Prescott, manager of PETA's fish empathy campaigns, assures us that synthetic fish sticks "taste pretty good." He also shares this interesting fact:

Fish are interesting, quizzical animals with unique personalities.

Take for example the fish in the old StarKist commercials; he had a personality — and the Little Mermaid was downright charismatic.

But I forgot, PETA is completely on the level about this stuff. These are the people who believe that fish use tools.

Hat tip: Blogmeister USA.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:46 PM | Comments (13)

Lawyers For Animals

The absurdity has now reached the point that Switzerland is going to vote on whether animals should be represented by lawyers in court.

If the referendum passes, those animals that can't afford attorneys will be provided representation at the taxpayers' expense.

Swiss readers are warned not to leave any chicken bones in their garbage. If a dog or raccoon gets into it and chokes, you might be sued.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:33 AM | Comments (8)

Michael Eckhart, Global Warming Hoax Enforcer

It is my intention to destroy your career as a liar. If you produce one more editorial against climate change, I will launch a campaign against your professional integrity. I will call you a liar and charlatan to the Harvard community of which you and I are members. I will call you out as a man who has been bought by Corporate America. Go ahead, guy. Take me on.

Those are the words of Michael T. Eckhart, president of the American Council on Renewable Energy (ACORE) to Marlo Lewis, senior fellow of the Competitive Enterprise Institute (CEI).

CEI doesn't dispute that climate fluctuates, but isn't drinking Al Gore's leftist Kool-Aid when it comes to the causes — thus the threats.

Over 400 organizational members pay into ACORE, including the federal Departments of Agriculture, Commerce, and Energy, as well as the EPA. This is your tax dollar at work.

In a separate threat, Eckhart demanded that CEI reverse its position and start spouting global warming propaganda "or I will take every action I can think of to shut you down" — including siccing the IRS on it.

Why not? Besides heading ACORE, Eckhart is cochairman of the World Council for Renewable Energy and a member of the Clinton Global Initiative. Presumably he's making good money off the global warming hoax, and doesn't want his golden goose threatened.

Just so long as no one thinks this has anything to do with science.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:47 AM | Comments (23)

Movin' the D Downward

Decades of left-wing political leadership have reduced Detroit to a third-world hellhole, so lawless and impoverished, it doesn't even have supermarkets. But a "diverse panel" speaking at Wayne State University yesterday came up with some proposals on how to make it all better. Sponsored in part by the Detroit News, the panel discussion was entitled "Movin' the D Forward."

Here's the prescription for making Detroit a "world-class city":

The state should invest more in education and less in prisons.

Change mandatory sentencing laws that disproportionately target poor people.

Cap suburban sprawl.

Detroit should welcome immigrants, and require the police and other city employees to live in the city.

In other words, plunge ever deeper into moonbattery, and hope for the best. But with every year of liberal leadership, hope in Detroit gets harder to come by.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:09 AM | Comments (8)

July 26, 2007

US Army Infiltrated by Moonbat

The current epidemic of moonbattery is so out of control, it's inevitable that moonbats would find their way into the military, the better to destroy it from within. A case in point is The New Republic milblogger formerly known as Scott Thomas. As noted earlier, doubt has been cast on Thomas' reports of American soldiers defiling the remains of dead children, humiliating a disfigured woman, intentionally running over dogs, etc. But even if uncorroborated and almost certainly untrue, at least his tales conform to TNR's liberal agenda.

Now we know his real name: Scott Thomas Beauchamp. Unsurprisingly, he is a flaming moonbat who apparently entered the military with the deliberate purpose of acquiring credibility with which to attack it, thus securing a place among the elite intelligentsia.

Michelle Malkin rounds up the facts nicely, with quotes from the aspiring writer Beaumont himself. Here's some of his poetry:

Every morning I get up and I'm a little more liberal than the day before

Every morning I get up and try to recite a fact from something I read last night.

Every morning I get up and wish I was as free as the people that I'm "fighting for"

Every morning I get up and think I'm a tool for global corporations

Every morning I get up and miss my mother

Every morning I get up and shave

Every morning I get up and realize how much I love my comrades

Every morning I get up and say I'm Scott Beauchamp, in the army, living in Germany, and this is my life, and I'm going to be treated like shit today and do landscaping and janitorial work and practice killing people and there could be no other way to appreciate what I had or what I'm going to have once I get out other than enduring this now when all I really want to do is teach history and lay around and read and hustle around and repair the world (tikkun olam) and sift through knowledge and improve culture and learn how to sail and work in soup kitchens and start a family and really, I mean REALLY study the best the western civilization has to offer and facilitiate the mystery and power through everything I do, but I cant do it without getting through this army experience first, which will add a legitimacy to EVERYTHING i do afterwards, and totally bolster my opinions on defense, etc, and of course its making me a lot less lazy, just because im not use to being lazy any more, etc.

Every morning I get up…

Not exactly the model soldier, but just the guy to bring us reports from Iraq spun to suit the MSM's agenda.

Here's what he looks like:

And here's his MySpace avatar, presumably revealing his true inner self:

Dan Rather would be delighted with the journalistic integrity The New Republic showed by letting this maladjusted freakazoid use their magazine for a soapbox from which to slander the American military.

Posted by Van Helsing at 5:50 PM | Comments (8)

Moonbat Judge Decrees Hazleton Cannot Defend Itself

US District Judge James Munley has decreed that Hazleton, Pennsylvania may not use commonsense measures to defend itself from becoming completely inundated by illegal aliens the federal government refuses to keep out of the country.

About a third of Hazleton's population is now Central American, and much of it is in this country illegally. The effect on crime rates and social service costs has been as you might expect.

Today's ruling could affect dozens of towns across the country that followed Hazleton Mayor Lou Barletta's lead by fining businesses that hire illegal aliens and penalizing landlords who rent to them.

Just as we could win the war in Iraq if the Dems and the media would let us, we could easily secure our borders from invasion. However, the enemy within is the most difficult to overcome. Our own authorities intend for the country to be forcibly colonized from across the effectively unguarded border, so that it may be remade into a new nation that will not resist socialism. If we don't continue to fight tooth and nail, they will succeed.

Posted by Van Helsing at 4:25 PM | Comments (4)

Rising Tide of Moonbattery Ahead?

Just as the climate naturally fluctuates, so do our politics — and WaPo raises the frightening possibility that we are now oscillating in the direction of the lunatic Left.

How else to explain a Democrat field consisting entirely of moonbats who advocate open homosexuality in the military, socialized medicine, tax increases, and surrender to Islamic terrorists?

Even the Republican candidates are liberals in many respects. Giuliani has supported abortion and gun control. Romney has favored abortion and socialized medicine. McCain has so many loose screws in his head, every time he shakes it you think he's playing the maracas. He wants to close Gitmo and claims to believe in global warming.

More disturbing than the WaPo piece are some of the comments it drew. A few samples:

The most important reason that Edwards should be president is the fact that he is not bought off and the corporations and corporatocracy and their controlled MSM are scared to death of him! Edwards all the way!!

It has been an embarrassment for almost 30 years to be called an American due entirely to the 'pube party and their attempt to "talibanize" our nation. IF we can get our collective heads out of our _sses we stand a chance of reclaiming our place of "shining beacon" of hope, learning, freedom, etc. Currently we are ANYTHING BUT.

Let's just admit that the United States has been going down the wrong path for a very long time. […] Bottom Line: Equality of condition should be the goal[…].

In many ways, this country is divided between most of the American people on one side and the Republican Party AND THE CORPORATE MEDIA on the other side.

To think there are people walking around loose, completely unmedicated, who think the mainstream media favors Republicans. It's getting scary out there.

On a tip from Charles.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:51 PM | Comments (4)

Moonbat Desecrates Flag, Assaults Deputy

Mark and Deborah Kuhn of moonbat-infested Asheville, North Carolina decided to poke a finger in the eye of anyone who respects our flag by flying it upside down — a symbol of distress and/or disrespect. In case their message was too subtle, they also pinned signs to Old Glory, expressing their defeatist political views.

Incredibly, the Kuhns expressed amazement that people would react angrily to the desecrated flag — despite their obvious intent to infuriate. When citizen complaints resulted in a deputy being sent to inform them they were violating a state law against flag desecration by pinning signs all over it, Mark Kuhn slammed the door on the deputy's hand hard enough to break the glass pane. The deputy's hand was cut, and Kuhn also struck him in the face and refused to show ID. Yet he was arrested on only misdemeanor charges.

Hollers Kuhn:

We are going to do our best to get a civil liberties lawyer from the ACLU.

You see, he doesn't think the deputy he assaulted should be able "to get away with this."

On a tip from Hope Angel.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:03 PM | Comments (7)

Hollywood Planning Defeatist Propaganda Barrage

Smelling victory, America's enemies within are gearing up for a major assault intended to break our spirits and ensure victory for al-Qaeda and Iran. Hollyweird is planning to flood the market with peacenik propaganda films, designed to impugn the military and instill in the public the pacifistic self-hatred that makes defeat at the hands of Islamic totalitarians inevitable.

"In the Valley of Elah" will feature American soldiers senselessly murdering each other and the American flag flying upside down in the heartland. In "Grace Is Gone," squishy moonbat John Cusack will play a guy with two daughters struggling with the loss of his wife to war. The hero of "Stop-Loss" is a veteran who defies orders to return to Iraq. Has-been director Brian De Palma's "Redacted" will portray American soldiers persecuting an Iraqi family. A film is being developed about Richard A. Clarke, a former national security official who now devotes himself to biting the Bush Administration's ankles.

After Vietnam, there was no shortage of nauseating "Coming Home" type films stressing the futility of attempting to defend American civilization from those who would destroy it. But nowadays Hollywood is so brazen in expressing its treasonous impulses that it barfs this stuff up even while American troops are still out there getting shot at.

As for patriotic movies that remind us that our troops are heroes fighting for a country that deserves their sacrifices — don't hold your breath waiting for them to come out of Tinseltown.

Part of Hollywood's upcoming propaganda barrage on behalf of al-Qaeda and Iran.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:33 AM | Comments (15)

Chavez Forbids Criticism

Hugo Chavez has again demonstrated his devotion to liberty by forbidding visitors from criticizing his government. Bellowed the Left's latest heartthrob:

How long are we going to allow a person, from any country in the world, to come to our own house to say there's a dictatorship here, that the President is a tyrant, and no one does anything about it?

It's a good thing for Chavez the USA doesn't have laws like this, or he would have been in hot water for the childish insults he directed at President Bush at the UN last year, and on friendly soil in Harlem.

Venezuela's media isn't allowed to criticize the government either. Radio Caracas Television has been driven off the air, and Venevision has knuckled under, replacing critical coverage with state-sanctioned propaganda. The only remaining opposition media is Globovision, which is currently under investigation.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:00 AM | Comments (7)

San Francisco Still at War With Constitution

San Franfreakshow's war on our Second Amendment liberties continues — but at least bureauweenies are dropping the pretense that it has anything to do with preventing crime.

New laws flip the bird to the Constitution by prohibiting the sale or possession of firearms on city property, requiring firearms in residences to be locked up so they won't do any good against intruders, and requiring the single gun dealer left in San Francisco to jump through still more pointless bureaucratic hoops.

Even Nathan Ballard, spokesman for metrosexual Mayor Gavin Newsom, took a pause from crowing that San Francisco will have the most oppressive gun laws in the nation to admit that the laws won't affect gun violence. After all, gun laws only pertain to the law-abiding, not to criminals — though moonbats are doing their best to make criminals of normal Americans who only want to exercise their constitutional right to defend themselves.

The still more blatantly unconstitutional Proposition H would make it illegal to buy and sell guns in the city and force owners to turn over their guns to the police. It passed with 58% of the vote among the same constituency that gave us the current Speaker of the House, but the NRA has thankfully tied it up in court. Even the leftist Newsom has refrained from supporting Proposition H, possibly because he has it confused with Preparation H, which is considered to taste awful.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:29 AM | Comments (2)

July 25, 2007

If Only

If we could have one magic wish, how better to spend it than to have General George S. Patton return and save us from our moonbattery:

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 3:44 PM | Comments (6)

GE Cashing in on Global Warming Hoax

In an astonishing display of opportunistic greed, General Electric issued a credit card today that allows users to be automatically fleeced of up to 1% of their card purchases. The cash will go to buy "greenhouse emissions offsets" — a known and rather obvious scam.

Even without government coercion (yet), there is a massive greenhouse gas credit trade in the US. It reached nearly 24 million tons of CO2 last year. The level of evidence that such schemes affect the climate remains steady at none. They may as well issue pixie dust credits.

But as P.T. Barnum is said to have said, there's one born every minute.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 3:20 PM | Comments (7)

Heidi Sakkestad, Mutilated Refugee From Socialized Medicine

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette has a frightening story to tell:

Four years ago in her native Norway, Heidi Sakkestad was told by a dentist — and not even her own dentist — that she would look much better if she let him fix her overbite.

Since then, Ms. Sakkestad's life has been a string of doctors, denials and disappointments.

The minor surgery went horribly wrong, and Ms. Sakkestad woke up with her jaw hanging 8 to 10 millimeters to the right of its normal position. Five subsequent surgeries over the next four years only made the problem worse, and she ended up with several broken jaw bones.

Not only was she unable to eat or speak, she began having muscle spasms and lost sight in her right eye, because of a twisted bone that affected both vision and movement. She was in constant pain, and could no longer leave her house.

"My eye was closed, I had spasms," she said. "My arms went all over, my head went all over."

"Four years," she started to say, but could not continue as her eyes filled with tears. "It's hard to talk about it."

Eventually, the doctors gave up. She had seen a dentist, an oral surgeon and a neurologist, but none had been able to help. They told Ms. Sakkestad, 48, that her problems were psychological, and there was nothing they could do for her. They sent her a letter recommending she find a psychiatrist.

Fortunately it looks like this awful tale will have a happy ending: Ms. Sakkestad left Norway for Mercy Hospital in Pittsburgh, where competent doctors have her well on the way to recovery.

According to her friend Michele Grindheim, who suggested coming to Pittsburgh:

You can find a bad doctor anywhere in the world. But the problem with this situation is that all the ones who got involved were friends with each other, so they kept covering up everything instead of saying "OK, we made a mistake, now we have to help this woman."

That can happen when you come up against a bureaucracy. As the Post-Gazette forgot to mention, Norway features "free" socialized medicine. I'd say "you get what you pay for," except that "free medicine" is extravagantly expensive — as we will be reminded each tax day if any of the current Dem POTUS candidates makes it to the White House.

If that happens, this story won't have a happy ending after all.

On a tip from Reid.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:33 PM | Comments (1)

Another Light Hurricane Season, Despite Gore's Bellowing

Here's some good news — unless you're trying to become rich and powerful by exploiting the global warming hoax. The 2007 hurricane season may be less severe than previously expected due to cool water temperatures in the Atlantic.

Elizabeth Edwards' tangerine boycott must be working.

But I'm forgetting: the hurricane season was a dud last year too, wasn't it? There must be a very lucrative grant waiting for the first scientist to come up with a computer model proving that American CO2 emissions are causing hurricanes to store up their strength for a single massive assault that will wash away Florida unless taxes are raised immediately.

On a tip from Metalgarth.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:22 AM | Comments (8)

New Haven Passing Out IDs to Illegal Aliens

When it comes to expressing contempt for the rule of law and the territorial sovereignty of the United States, New Haven, Connecticut has gone beyond the "sanctuary city" policy of refusing to cooperate with the federal government regarding immigration laws. The home of ultra-liberal Yale University is now passing out ID cards to illegal aliens.

This is excellent news for the next 9/11 crew, who won't be put to the trouble of getting their IDs on the black market, where they can cost $150 these days.

A New York City councilman will be offering a similar plan. No doubt Boston won't be far behind.

There is a silver lining. If we can use these IDs to lure enough illegals to the Northeast, maybe "Aztlan" can still be saved from demographic conquest.

On a tip from Bob.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:18 AM | Comments (4)

Mental Ward Churchill Headed to Court

At long last Colorado University has been shamed into showing faux Indian ethnic studies professor Ward Churchill the door. Of his almost numberless disqualifications, Churchill was finally canned primarily for plagiarism and fabricating lies about the iniquities of America that he passed off as scholarly research.

He was not fired for calling the victims of the World Trade Center atrocity "Little Eichmanns." On the contrary, having made this particularly egregious remark continues to be his primary defense as he takes his one-man circus from the campus to the courtroom. You see, no one may silence unpopular views, so long as they are politically correct unpopular views. Churchill plans to sue in Denver District Court, in hopes of finding moonbats on the jury who will agree that his loudly expressed hatred of America more than makes up for any academic misconduct.

If he really wants a cash jackpot and not just another chance to denounce his country in front of the cameras, he might be wiser to try suing in San Francisco. As Slapstick Politics reports, even liberal Denver appears to be fed up with the creep. But no doubt his San Fran fan base will stick with him to the end:

On a tip from Dwaine. Hat tip: Longrange.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:27 AM | Comments (7)

July 24, 2007

Topless Moonbats Crash Shrillaryfest

As Zombie reports, Hillary Clinton's San Francisco campaign headquarters opened yesterday. Its launch party corresponded with a Democrat debate. Hillary's hapless minions gathered at the new headquarters to watch on TV.

But there were intruders in their midst: Breasts Not Bombs and Code Pink moonbats so beyond the reach of sanity and decency that they detest Shrillary for not being enough of a leftist. When they revealed themselves, any normal person would have convulsed in horror.

However, this being a Shrillary event, the only normal person in evidence was Zombie herself, who resolutely photographed the revolting spectacle. The Clintonistas responded by chanting their evil queen's name like satanic nuns in a midnight movie.

Here's a sample. The topless hag on the left is Breasts Not Bombs honcho Sherry Glaser:

You're welcome for the red bars I was nice enough to add.

On a tip from Hope Angel.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:40 PM | Comments (20)

New Republic Accused of Fabricating News Again

What have we here? From none other than Jayson Blair's old employer, The Gray Hag:

Just who is the "Baghdad Diarist"?

It is a question that many people are asking The New Republic, the [left-leaning] Washington political magazine that has been running articles attributed to an American soldier in Baghdad.

The author, who used the pen name Scott Thomas, has written three articles for the magazine since February, describing gruesome incidents in Iraq. Last week, The Weekly Standard questioned the veracity of the New Republic articles and invited readers with knowledge about the military or Baghdad to comment.

Since then, several readers and a spokesman for the base where the soldier is supposedly based have written in, raising more questions.

"Absolutely every piece of information that's come out since we put that call up has cast further doubt on that story," said Michael Goldfarb, the online editor of The Weekly Standard. "There's not a single person that has come forward and said, 'It sounds plausible.'"

Franklin Foer, the editor of The New Republic, will not reveal the author's identity but says the magazine is investigating the accuracy of his articles. In the late 1990s, under different editors, the magazine fired an associate editor, Stephen Glass, for fabrications. […]

The diaries have described some shocking incidents of military life, including soldiers openly mocking a disfigured woman on their base and a private wearing a found piece of a child's skull under his helmet.

But why would an MSM outlet want to make up stories about American soldiers being mean and morbid? After all, even liberals support the troops.

Come to think of it, why do they report this stuff even if it's true? They must think it's more germane than reporting on the troop surge working.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:51 AM | Comments (2)

Alec Rawls Continues to Fight Flight 93 Memorial Abomination

Now a word from Alec Rawls, who as mentioned previously has been fighting to stop the Flight 93 Memorial, which if built as planned will commemorate not Todd Beamer and the other heroes on that flight, but rather the maniacal Muslims who hijacked the jet:

I am currently engaged in something approaching war with western Pennsylvania newspapers that have fact checked my claims about Islamic and terrorist memorializing features in the Flight 93 Memorial and found them to be accurate, but are refusing to tell their readers. At the same time, they are quoting numerous critics and Flight 93 family members who claim that I am spreading preposterous untruths. The press is whipping up the local population against me as I am set to travel out there tomorrow to attend the Memorial Project's yearly public meeting this weekend, and I am firing back by running 3/4 page full color advertisements in the Somerset Daily American. (Somerset is next door to the Flight 93 crash site.)

The back-story is the Memorial Project lying to the Flight 93 families about my findings (thoroughly documented in my Crescent of Betrayal book). For instance, they lied to the families about the Mecca orientation of the giant central crescent of the original Crescent of Embrace design. This giant crescent remains fully intact in the Bowl of Embrace redesign, and it is trivially easy to verify that a person facing directly into the crescent is facing almost exactly at Mecca. The leaders of the Memorial project admit this. In an April 2006 conference call, Project Superintendent Joanne Hanley explained why she wasn't worried about the almost exact Mecca-orientation of the crescent. "It's not exact," she said to me. "That's one we talked about. It has to be exact." At the same time, she was telling the Flight 93 families that my information had been investigated and debunked.

I actually got a local reporter to fact check the orientation of the crescent last week. I gave him the address of an Islamic website that has a Mecca direction calculator. While I was on the phone with him, he downloaded a Mecca direction graphic for Somerset and placed it over the site plan. (Recreation below, with crescent bisector superimposed). "Yup. It points to Mecca," he told me, assuring me that he would publish this bit of fact checking in his article, but he didn't. Again, reporting only quoted people saying that I am a liar. I suspect that it was the editor that stripped the fact checking out.

Green circle was obtained from the Salat Times utility at Islam.com. It shows the direction to Mecca from Somerset PA. The red arrow shows that a person standing halfway between the tips of the giant crescent and facing into the center of the crescent is facing almost exactly at Mecca. The meaning? A crescent that Muslims face into to face Mecca is called a mihrab and is the central feature around which every mosque is built. (Everything you see in this graphic remains completely intact in the superficially altered Bowl of Embrace redesign.)

Here are some links to the war that is ongoing between the press and myself.

Yesterday's large color copy here:
http://www.crescentofbetrayal.com/WideSite-PlanAdCopyCMYK,PDF.pdf

Today's large color ad copy here:
http://www.crescentofbetrayal.com/Star+BlocksCMYK,FinalPDF.pdf

The Tribune Democrat's fact-checking free reporting here:
http://www.tribune-democrat.com/local/local_story_196231439.html

And here:
http://www.tribune-democrat.com/local/local_story_202233829.html

I need more help exposing this bad behavior. The press is setting up the local people to want to tear me apart this week. They know that the Memorial Project is using the families to block for the hijacker and they refuse to let their readers know.

Fortunately, we are no longer at the mercy of the print media. Rawls' book explaining this insanity is still available for free download here.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:11 AM | Comments (7)

$21 Million Suit Over Preventing an Abortion

This one ought to warm the Breck Girl's heart:

A jury has awarded $21 million to a couple and their lawyers for having a baby with Smith-Lemli-Opitz syndrome, which means it can't synthesize cholesterol properly. The lucky couple are supposedly owed all this money because they were told after their first sick baby that they could have normal children in the future. If they had known the next baby would have the disorder, they would have killed the poor thing when it was legal to do so, i.e. prenatally.

Since the primary victim is a doctor at the University of South Florida, the looters are going to need assistance from the state legislature, which has given government institutions a leg up on the private sector by capping lawsuits against them at $200,000. The couple's lawyer Christian Searcy, who describes the $21 million jackpot as "conservative but fair," is planning to lean on state lawmakers to make a special exception, since the child failing to be aborted "was so preventable and is so poignant."

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:24 AM | Comments (1)

Moonbats Stall Attempts to Make Roads Safe From Unlicensed Drivers

Fed up with the lethal chaos on our roads, some California counties are supporting a state law requiring that cars driven by unlicensed or uninsured drivers be impounded on the spot. This makes too much sense to be permitted by moonbats, who are challenging the law on civil rights grounds.

You see, many of the maniacs flying down the wrong side of the road dead drunk at excessive speeds, killing Americans on a daily if not hourly basis, turn out to be unlicensed and uninsured because they are illegal immigrants who have violated our laws and our sovereignty by sneaking across the hardly guarded border from Mexico. Therefore, expecting drivers to be licensed and insured is racist.

Recent decrees from the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals have reduced a statewide association of police chiefs to warning that impounding cars from unlicensed drivers could be construed as a violation of the Fourth Amendment — even if the drivers are not American citizens and aren't even in the country legally.

Effectively this would mean we have to wait until they actually crash the car into someone before we can get them out from behind its wheel for awhile. As for the rule of law — if that were still taken seriously, the illegals wouldn't be here in the first place.

If you like the action and excitement caused by whole fleets of unlicensed illegal aliens drunkenly reenacting Hollywood chase scenes on our roads, send a thank-you card to the Ninth Circus.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:00 AM | Comments (1)

Muslim Workers Whine to EEOC After Praying Instead of Working

Employers trying to run a production line might want to think twice about hiring Somali Muslims, some of whom have been causing chaos at a Swift & Co. meatpacking plant in Omaha by walking off the job so they can get their faces to the ground to praise their wicked god.

Naturally the Hamas front group CAIR is on the case, having filed a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. At least 44 workers have signed a complaint, alleging that Swift dares to put packing meat ahead of worshiping Allah.

As Swift attorney Donald Selzer observes, unscheduled breaks can force unplanned shutdowns of production lines.

Whines fired Muslim Ali Schire:

Some of the people even had to give up praying at all for fear of being fired.

Given its history of moonbattery, the EEOC can be expected to take the Muslims' side, possibly arguing that no one is ever fired for packing meat in a mosque.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:48 AM | Comments (6)

July 23, 2007

Send in the Clown (Again)

Apparently the tension in the Middle East has reached the point where everyone needs a little comic relief. Hamas leader Ismail Haniyeh is reported to have accepted an offer by clueless useful idiot Jimmy "the Dhimmi" Carter to mediate in the face-off with rival terror gang Fatah.

Since Hamas is the more bloodthirstily hostile toward Israel and America, it's no surprise it would want Carter to mediate, since he can be counted on to take its side — as he has done consistently. The mediation would counter US policy, which calls for Fatah to isolate Hamas — but sticking out his withered tongue at US policy is standard operating procedure for America's worst ex-president.

The only surprise is that even Hamas can still take this treasonous old fool seriously.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 7:35 AM | Comments (8)

Mother Moonbat to Desecrate Arlington Today

This morning at 9:30 Eastern readers in the DC area are encouraged to join a counterprotest at the entrance to Arlington National Cemetery, where the very personification of moonbattery, Cindy Sheehan, is planning to desecrate sacred ground with yet another self-promoting surrender rally.

Regular readers will need no introduction to the She-Hag, who has defiled her heroic son's memory, sided with every enemy of America she could find, called the terrorists killing American troops "freedom fighters," and even earned the fawning approval of the odious Maureen Dowd in the process of establishing herself as the female Michael Moore.

The counterprotest will gather on the sidewalk near the Metro entrance on Memorial Drive. Don't forget to bring flags and signs supporting the troops who are laying their lives on the line for us, only to be spat upon by the morally deformed moonbat hordes who adulate the Ditch Witch.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:54 AM | Comments (9)

Child Rapist Freed For Speaking African Language

Mahamu Kanneh of Liberia attended high school and community college in the USA, yet when he was hauled into court for repeatedly raping a 7-year-old girl, a court-ordered psychiatrist decided that the court needed to provide him with an interpreter so he could follow the proceedings in his obscure native language Vai.

Problem is, they couldn't find one. So the aptly named judge Katherine Savage let the guy go. What the hell, little girls get raped every day, but how often do moonbats get a chance to set a criminal free because he speaks Vai?

PS: WaPo says its reporters found three available Vai translators in just one night. But then, they were probably trying, which gives them an unfair advantage.

On a tip from Pete.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:32 AM | Comments (6)

Socialized Medicine Perk: Free Goodies For Addicts

Maybe socialized medicine isn't such an idiotic idea after all — provided you're a drug addict.

Britain's National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellent (NICE — I'm serious, that's what it goes by) will recommend that the National Health Service offer free TV sets, iPods, and best of all vouchers that apparently can be redeemed for drugs to heroin and cocaine addicts if they manage to stay clean long enough to pass a drug test.

The vouchers start at only £5 a test, but each time you take a test the payoff goes up — and the testing would typically occur three times a week.

Meanwhile, as Katherine Murphy of the Patients Association reports:

Some people with genuine disease are being forced to sell their homes for the medicines they need.

Patients are denied drugs for blindness, Alzheimer's, lung cancer, etc., under NICE rationing. That's what they get for having conditions that aren't self-inflicted.

On a tip from Matt.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:14 AM | Comments (2)

July 22, 2007

Big Raise For Publicly Employed Illegal Aliens

When state officials discovered that Spring Valley, New York Mayor George Darden was hiring illegal aliens, they quickly set the situation right — by commanding him to raise their wages by 300%.

Both federal and state funds are being spent on the urban renewal project for which Darden recruited the illegals. He was paying them $10/hour in cash, in violation of state wage laws. But he won't be prosecuted, any more than the illegals will be prosecuted — they're now making $40/hour, courtesy of taxpayers.

So much for getting cheap labor in exchange for our border security — if not our national sovereignty — having been reduced to a joke.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:53 AM | Comments (3)

Illegal Alien Molests Little Boy

If you're an illegal alien, you don't have to get drunk and crash your car head on into a State Trooper to get the attention of the authorities. Another way to do it is to molest a 13-year-old boy, as foreign derelict Jesus Mora Nava did after luring the kid to his encampment with alcohol.

Nava had already been deported at least once, and had been arrested for the public intoxication characteristic of Harry Reid's "undocumented Americans."

Maybe a fence will be in place by the time he gets out of jail, so that after his next deportation he won't just bounce back again — but I wouldn't bet on it.

Jesus Mora Nava: Molesting the children Americans won't molest.

On a tip from Bob.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:21 AM | Comments (8)

Ninth Circus Closes Down Offshore Drilling

High gas prices couldn't be the fault of the excessive taxes, or by now it would have occurred to bureaucrats to lower them. So what is the cause? Big Oil's insistence on taking a few pennies profit on each gallon? Or could it be because moonbats won't let us drill for oil?

The infamous 9th Circus Court of Appeals has commanded Shell Oil to stop exploratory drilling off the north coast of Alaska, on the grounds that the Minerals Management Service approved the drilling without fully considering how beluga whales, polar bears, and other favored beasts would be affected in the highly unlikely event of a massive oil spill.

A hearing is planned for mid August in San Francisco to decided if Shell can go forward and provide us with some oil, after bidding $39 million for the offshore leases, and blowing who knows how much on court costs.

If not, no problem: we can just keep paying through the nose to buy oil from Arabs, who will spend the proceeds on madrasahs and weapons programs. Hopefully the polar bears and beluga whales will appreciate it.

On a tip from Byron.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:54 AM | Comments (6)

Transsexual Freakazoid Sues Prison System

Sexually perplexed felon Alexis Giraldo is suing the California prison system and several guards for locking him up in a male prison despite his belief that he is a woman trapped in a man's body.

Giraldo expects taxpayers to reward him not only for having been subjected to emotional distress, but for having his constitutional rights violated. It seems that locking transgender freakazoids up in the prison of their real gender now constitutes cruel and unusual punishment. In addition to free money, he is demanding that prison officials come up with a special system for incarcerating transgender criminals, who after all are special people.

Although several counties have separate units for transgender criminals, California is old-fashioned enough to go by genitalia when deciding the gender of inmates. Transsexuals who haven't actually undergone a chopadickoffomy procedure can either go in with the other men or, more appropriately, opt for a psychiatric prison, were Giraldo currently resides. No doubt it qualifies as oppression that society would infer the guy is in any way abnormal.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 8:30 AM | Comments (22)

July 21, 2007

Couple Forced to Share Condo With Flock of Bats

In a world run by moonbats, who takes precedence, humans or bats? The answer to this very easy question can be found in ultra-liberal Vancouver, where a couple's $509,000 condo is infested with about 80 bats living in its walls.

Removing the bats is forbidden. Anyone caught molesting them during their May-to-August breeding season is subject to a $345 per animal fine.

Inevitably, the bats have found their way into the apartment. The couple even found a bat in their bed.

Bats are the primary reservoir for rabies in British Columbia. Rabies causes acute encephalitis and is almost always fatal. The unhappy homeowners are in the midst of four rounds of rabies shots.

They've cleaned buckets of bat feces from inside the walls, and report being kept up all night by the nocturnal animals' endless squealing.

But the important thing, according public health veterinarian Brian Radke, is that

the young are being properly cared for and that we're maintaining the bond [between baby bats and momma bats]. It would be traumatizing to have them captured and relocated somewhere else.

It might also be traumatizing to have your home taken over by noisy, filthy, potentially lethal-disease–ridden flying creepy-crawlies. But of course, human concerns are no longer considered relevant.

On a tip from Jimbo.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:29 AM | Comments (12)

English Flag Banned in England

Lancashire garbage collector Matthew Carter, who was born in Barbados and is black, has been forbidden from wearing a St George's Cross bandana to hold back his dreadlocks because the symbol "could be considered offensive and racist."

St George's Cross is the flag of England.

How profoundly sick does a society have to be to ban its own flag? Moonbattery is truly the most hideous disease ever to afflict the human race — the moral and intellectual equivalent of leprosy.

Now Carter wears a bandana imprinted with a skull and crossbones. Presumably this meets with the approval of politically correct bureauweenies.

On a tip from The Panday.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:29 AM | Comments (6)

Illegal Alien Deported 14 Times, Then Kills

Here's another one: "undocumented American" Julio Villasana had been kicked out of the USA 14 times before he got around to killing Nashville mandolin-maker Charlie Derrington in yet another illegal alien drunk driving wreck. But of course, deportation serves no purpose whatsoever, considering that our unconscionably irresponsible government refuses to perform its most basic duty by defending the border.

Villasana had been driving in the wrong direction, and fled the scene after killing Derrington. He will be eligible for parole in 7 1/2 years. The odds that he hasn't killed his last American are looking pretty good.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:03 AM | Comments (2)

Drunken Illegal Alien Gets Wrist Slap For Crashing Into State Trooper

Great news: for the next year and a half, there will be one less drunken illegal alien turning our roads into a demolition derby. Alfonso Cedillo Maldonado was sentenced to 18 months and a $3,500 fine for crashing his car head on into a Virginia State Trooper with a blood alcohol level over three times the legal limit.

Maldonado's lawyer is complaining that this wrist slap was the maximum allowed; he wants it reduced. But unless he succeeds, you are virtually guaranteed not to be killed by this particular drunken maniac until he gets back in his car sometime in early 2009.

Unfortunately, there are countless more where he came from, and no one in authority has shown any meaningful indication of addressing the crisis. See here for a partial list of the victims of the illegal alien invasion.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:49 AM | Comments (1)

July 20, 2007

Dems Provide Terrorists With Crucial Support

If it seems too incredible to be true that the Democrat Party would actively side with terrorists against American citizens, consider this:

House Dems have managed to exclude from homeland security legislation a provision that would protect the public from being sued for good faith reporting of suspicious behavior suggesting a terrorist attack.

Such legislation is necessary in light of the Flying Imams, a group that deliberately convinced passengers and crew that they were planning to hijack a flight from Minneapolis to Phoenix, and who are now suing them for objecting, as part of campaign to soften our defenses.

Observes Rep. Peter King (R-NY):

Democrats are trying to find any technical excuse to keep immunity out of the language of the bill to protect citizens, who in good faith, report suspicious activity to police or law enforcement. I don't see how you can have a homeland security bill without protecting people who come forward to report suspicious activity.

Be vigilant, bureaucrats like Michael Chertoff advise us when we ask what they're doing to keep us safe in return for our tax money. But don't be too vigilant, or CAIR will drag you into court to be financially ruined, backed to the hilt by Saudi money and Democrat iniquity.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 5:47 AM | Comments (17)

Animal Rights Kooks Promise Violence

The maniacal Jerry Vlasak of the North American Animal Liberation Press Office is at it again, lacking only an AK-47 prop in the background as he thunderously warns of the violence his fellow sociopaths plan to inflict on society in the name of the animals:

Nothing else works, and these people are torturing animals to death, and they should be stopped. If they won't stop after using every other [means], they should be stopped using any means necessary.

I feel the same way about dangerous reprobates like Vlasak, who justifies his pathological views by referring to the equally terror-friendly Nelson Mandela:

Other organizations say the reluctance to use violence is a failed tactic. Nelson Mandela said the use of nonviolence is not a moral principle but it's a strategy, and there's no moral goodness in using an ineffective strategy.

It's always informative to hear about "moral goodness" from an unhinged creepazoid who advocates murdering scientists to prevent research that could save countless lives.

Unfortunately, if the National Intelligence Estimate is correct, we can expect a lot more Jerry Vlasak types skittering out from under the baseboards to kill in the name of oppressed puppies or the Earth Mother. The FBI is gearing up for terrorist attacks from the likes of Animal Liberation Front and Earth Liberation Front within the next few years.

Animal rights creep Jerry Vlasak advocates murder.

On tips from White Cane.

Posted by Van Helsing at 5:40 AM | Comments (5)

Aid to Poor Countries: Money Down the Drain

Two economists who left the International Monetary Fund within the last year, Raghuram Rajan and Arvind Subramanian, have admitted the obvious: aid to poor countries has no significant effect on the economic growth required to cure poverty.

Echoing liberals, the authors write:

There is a moral imperative to this question: it is a travesty for so many countries to remain poor if a relatively small transfer of resources from rich countries could set them on the path to growth.

However, they also observe that it doesn't make much sense to hand our money to the hostile dictators of Third-World basket cases if it isn't going to boost economic growth. Subramanian, who until last year was chief economist at the IMF, holds that aid money would be better spent on providing research and development incentives to the private sector.

Unfortunately this might mean fewer gold-plated toilet seats for the Idi Amins and Robert Mugabes of the world.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 5:36 AM | Comments (6)

July 19, 2007

New Zealand May Offer College Courses in Prostitution

As part of an attempt to increase the "quality and relevance" of tertiary education classes, New Zealand taxpayers may soon find themselves financing courses in prostitution.

However, the courses would need to "demonstrate genuine community need." If you've encountered an undertrained Kiwi call girl, please inform New Zealand's Tertiary Education Commission immediately.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 1:00 PM | Comments (9)

Vegan Kucinich Sick With Food Poisoning

Whatever elfin species Dennis Kucinich belongs to, it seems to be closely related to humans, because he has proven unable to live healthily off his vegan diet, having been hospitalized with apparent food poisoning.

Vegans like Kucinich sacrifice their health to moonbattery by shunning not only meat, but any food containing animal products. If you want to turn out like the former Boy Mayor of the Mistake by the Lake, give the diet a try.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 12:38 PM | Comments (7)

Gen II Moonbat Brigade Signs Declaration of Interdependence

Yesterday the undistinguished descendants of various liberal icons gathered in London to mock the earthshaking events of 1776 by scribbling their names on a Declaration of Interdependence. Calling themselves the Gen II Peace Team, they have resolved "to use our collective strength to take action through non-violent, tangible steps to address instances of conflict and injustice worldwide."

I guess the world doesn't need Underdog anymore.

No need to fear, the Gen II Moonbat Brigade is here!

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 12:21 PM | Comments (2)

Moonbat Study Finds Victims of Communism Less Egocentric Than Americans

Cognitive psychologist Boaz Keysar of the University of Chicago has demonstrated the remarkable ability of academics to prop up their liberal prejudices with supposedly scientific research by running an experiment that worked like this:

Keysar and his colleagues arranged two blocks on a table so participants could see both. However, a piece of cardboard obstructed the view of one block so a "director," sitting across from the participant, could only see one block.

When the director asked 20 American participants (none of Asian descent) to move a block, most were confused as to which block to move and did not take into account the director's perspective. Even though they could have deduced that, from the director's seat, only one block was on the table.

Most of the 20 Chinese participants, however, were not confused by the hidden block and knew exactly which block the director was referring to. While following directions was relatively simple for the Chinese, it took Americans twice as long to move a block.

You could take from this that victims of Chinese communism are conditioned to see everything from the point of view of their bureaucratic masters, the better to stay alive. But Keysar chooses another explanation:

That strong, egocentric communication of Westerners was nonexistent when we looked at Chinese. The Chinese were very much able to put themselves in the shoes of another when they were communicating.

You see, as LiveScience puts it:

Collectivist societies, such as the Chinese, place more value on the needs of the group and less on the autonomy of the individual. In these societies, understanding other peoples' experiences is a more critical social skill than it is among typically more individualist Americans.

But Americans' shortcomings are nothing tens of millions of dead and generations of totalitarian slavery couldn't cure.

On a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:52 AM | Comments (4)

Ecofreaks Vandalize Hummer

WaPo reports:

On a narrow, leafy street in Northwest Washington, where Prius hybrid cars and Volvos are the norm, one man bought a flashy gray Hummer that was too massive to fit in his garage.

So he parked the seven-foot-tall behemoth on the street in front of his house and smiled politely when his eco-friendly neighbors looked on in disapproval at his "dream car."

It lasted five days on the street before two masked men took a bat to every window, a knife to each 38-inch tire and scratched into the body: "FOR THE ENVIRON."

Lucille Liem, who lives nearby and owns a Pious, opines that "It's ridiculous to be driving a Hummer" in a neighborhood that is so "liberal leaning."

Owner Gareth Groves dreamed of a Hummer for ages before taking the plunge, then getting it decked out with bigger tires and a lift kit, the better to enhance his "image-based" new business, Washington Sports Marketing. But now he wonders if there's any point getting it fixed, since moonbats will just destroy it again.

That's what happens when civilizations allow themselves to decay: people start to find that there's not much point building or rebuilding anything, because savages will just wreck it.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 10:29 AM | Comments (10)

Osama Obama Wants Sex Ed For Kindergartners

Another indication of the kind of America we'll be living in if by some disastrous turn of events Barack Hussein Obama were actually installed in the White House: Osama Obama has announced to the abortion mill known as Planned Parenthood that sex ed for kindergarteners is "the right thing to do."

B. Hussein doesn't like it that "inside the classroom the only thing that can be talked about is abstinence." With Goresque hyperbole, he screams that not teaching little kids about sex "is potentially consigning them to illness, pregnancy, poverty, and in some cases, death."

Naturally any sex ed conducted by state schools will meet all requirements regarding political correctness. So under President Obama, get ready to answer questions from your 4-year-old about fisting, rimming, and other delightful homosexual practices — Osama Obama's claims that sex ed in kindergarten will be "age-appropriate" notwithstanding.

On a tip from Conan.

Posted by Van Helsing at 9:27 AM | Comments (8)

Seattle Regulates Table Scraps

Seattle's ecofascists will now require city residents to pay to have their table scraps recycled. No, this is not a joke.

Thankfully, bureaucrats have no plans (for now) to inspect garbage to make sure citizens are recycling their table scraps. The important thing is that they get their money — so all single-family homes will be required to pay for this latest recycling program.

It could get even worse:

Seattle Public Utilities (SPU) will study a ban on putting food waste in the garbage can — and enforcing the ban as it does with aluminum, paper and glass. If businesses, apartments and houses place recyclable material in their trash, violators are fined or their garbage doesn't get picked up.

Also under consideration are bans on Styrofoam, plastic garbage bags, and do-it-yourself trips to garbage transfer stations.

Environmentalism is the most demented form of totalitarianism yet devised. It will go as far as we let it, until our very breath is taxed and regulated, if not banned.

On a tip from Bill.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:55 AM | Comments (18)

July 18, 2007

Comments Problem

The comments problem isn't fixed after all. I'm working with my Web host to resolve it. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Posted by Van Helsing at 2:03 PM | Comments (1)

Breck Girl Update

John Edwards is still steering so hard to the left, he's doing donuts.

Now he's ominously threatening to bus kids into the violent hellholes liberal policies have made of inner cities, and to pour even more money down the failing public schools whose unions almost compete with trial lawyers in the amount they spend buying influence in the Democrat Party.

Silky Pony has been raving that coercive wealth redistribution is "the great moral cause of our time." Yet there is no indication that he will give up his new $6 million, 28,000 square-foot mansion, paid for with loot that he expropriated from doctors when he was a trial lawyer himself, forcing them to spend more on insurance and thus driving up healthcare costs for everybody, the poor included.

Posted by Van Helsing at 12:31 PM | Comments (1)

Council of Elder Moonbats

British moonbats Richard Branson and Peter Gabriel have come up with an idea they really should have shopped to Comedy Central: a council of "elders" to resolve the problems of our global village.

The council will consist of doddering leftists decades past their expiration dates, including such stake-through-the-heart–worthy moonbats as Jimmy Carter, Nelson Mandela, and even the corrupt and useless Kofi Annan. This carnival of fools is expected to solve problems both real and imagined, from AIDS to global warming.

Much of their work is already done. Carter has the resolution to Middle East conflict figured out: it's all the Jews' fault, so let's give money to Hamas terrorists. Annan has solved the problem of genocidal dictators who starve their own people while living high on the hog — set up lucrative programs like "Oil for Food" to exploit the situation for easy riches. Mandela has solved the problem of African poverty with his trusted solution of abolishing property rights and driving out all the white people, then whining to the West for handouts while openly siding with his fellow thugs, dictators, and terrorists.

I can't wait to hear how these three stooges resolve AIDS and global warming.

Hat tip: The Corner, on a tip from V the K.

Posted by Van Helsing at 11:54 AM | Comments (7)

20,000% Tax Hike

The greedy fiends who now control Congress are proposing raising the maximum tax on a cigar from 5¢ to $10.

Cigars are often manufactured by small businesses, like the one run by Eric Newman in Tampa, who gasps:

I'm not sure in the history of man, since our forefathers founded the country in 1776, that there's ever been a tax increase of 20,000 percent. They had the Boston Tea Party for less than this.

Yes, but we had a lot more character back in the days of the Boston Tea Party. Nowadays, all a tyrant needs to do is bleat the magic words, "It's for the children," and We the People roll onto our backs to expose our soft yellow bellies.

The money the government manages to bleed from the cigar industry before driving it out of business will supposedly go to health insurance for children who aren't poor and consequently don't qualify for Medicaid — just a small taste of what socialized medicine has in store for us.

On a tip from Byron.

Posted by Van Helsing at 6:42 AM | Comments (4)

Gays in the Military: Wonderful Idea

The current crop of Dem POTUS candidates, in addition to favoring legislation that would make it official that homosexuals are superior before the eyes of the law, also want to end the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy, allowing open homosexuality in the military. If any of them take power, it won't be so unusual to read stories like this one:

Following a 5-month investigation, 25-year-old Private First Class Johnny Lamar Dalton has been arrested for deliberately spreading the HIV virus to a 17-year-old kid, despite having signed a written order not to have unprotected sex. Evidently authorities knew Dalton had AIDS and was likely to spread it by indulging in the pathologically promiscuous behavior for which homosexuals are so well known.

If this is what we get under "don't ask, don't tell," wait until Hillary gets to work trying to transform the armed forces into a