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March 14, 2007
Vampire Jonathan Sharkey Running For President
At last there's a presidential candidate who ought to excite the Dems' moonbat base. How tragic for them that Jonathan Sharkey will be running not as a Democrat, but on the Vampire, Witches and Pagan Party ticket.
Recently Secret Service agents visited the 42-year-old Sharkey and his teenage wife to ask him about his threats to impale President Bush. Smirks Sharkey:
They never even asked to see my impaling stick.
Fortunately Sharkey does not plan to impale W until after becoming President.
Based on his platform when he ran for Governor of Minnesota, Sharkey might actually be an improvement over any likely Democratic candidate. Rather than coddling killers and child molesters, he would have them impaled too. Despite being a vampire, he has no problem with the Ten Commandments being displayed on government buildings.

On a tip from V the K.
Posted by Van Helsing at March 14, 2007 3:41 PM
Comments
I wonder what Coulter would call that idiot?
Posted by: skh.pcola at March 14, 2007 4:52 PM
Given the choice between him and Hillary, Sharkey the Impaler wins hands down.
Posted by: Jimbo at March 14, 2007 5:21 PM
Sounds like a centrist democrat to me, relatively speaking of the current state of the demonocrat party..
Posted by: Eneils Bailey at March 14, 2007 5:26 PM
He's a vampire? Why is he out in the sunlight? And why is he planning on impaling Bush if he wins, rather than biting his neck and sucking the lifeblood out of him? What a wackjob...he can't even get the vampire schtick right!
Posted by: Pam at March 14, 2007 7:07 PM
hopefully, he'll suck the life out of what's left of the party.
Posted by: nanc at March 14, 2007 9:16 PM
This clown should be sued for impersonating Marilyn Marson.
Then maybe someone should drive a stake thru his heart and see if he turns to dust like vampires in the movies do? I dunno. Or at least impale him on his own impalement stick. Impalement was a rather nasty proposition when Vlad did it. It entered thru the butt and the point tip came out the mouth... that hurts just thinking about it.
Posted by: General Jack D. Ripper at March 15, 2007 7:09 AM

