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February 9, 2007
Another Step Closer to the Safety of Bureaucratic Utopia
The task of listing every conceivable human activity as either mandatory or forbidden is a big job, but bureaucrats are up to it.
Vermont legislators are moving us closer to this final objective by considering a measure that would ban eating, drinking, smoking, reading, writing, grooming, playing musical instruments, "interacting with pets or cargo," yapping into a cell phone, or using any other personal communication device while driving a car.
Although it's disappointing that I will no longer be able to play accordion to accompany my yodeling as I cruise through Vermont, I'm relieved that legislators haven't said a word about my habit of juggling live hamsters and balancing a ball on my nose as I drive.
Maryland and Texas are considering similar bills, but Connecticut has cheated by passing a bill that generically bans any activity that could interfere with the safe operation of the car. If they're going to make it that easy, they might as well just pass a law against reckless driving and be done with it.
On a tip from Bill V.
Posted by Van Helsing at February 9, 2007 12:34 PM
Comments
Freedom & Unity!
Posted by: Vonster at February 9, 2007 12:39 PM
Modest proposal: Why not just make a law making a driver 100% liable if he has an accident while operating a cell phone or doing any of those other activities?
Oh, wait, that would require people to make their own risk assessments and take personal responsibility for their own behavior... and we can't have that, now can we?
Posted by: V the K at February 9, 2007 12:49 PM
No drinking? As in, no coffee on the morning drive to work? Starbucks lobbyists will have a field day.
Posted by: NudeGayWhalesForJesus at February 9, 2007 1:52 PM
I guess everyone will just drive around bored, po'd and shoot at each other, more than they do now.
I bet they won't count a gunshot as traffic related.
We without a doubt have the most stupid of the stupid people in America serving in government. It is becoming more clear every day that 70% + of the American people are brainwashed, too cowardly to fight the politicians, or just plain old stupid, and that's giving 30% the benefit of the doubt.
Posted by: Scrapiron at February 9, 2007 7:22 PM
Sadly, I'm inclined to agree with you Scrapiron. It appears as though Americans continue to think of the government as a giant benevolent Santa Claus who will give us what we want instead of doing it ourselves.
Posted by: Chris at February 9, 2007 11:20 PM
Now, I'm assuming a few things here, but would all of the above "offences" come under the general catch-all of "driving without due care and attention"? That's the law over here - though, thanks to our current government, it's been superceded by a whole bunch of other crap laws (in fact, the criminal law related to road use runs to something like 150 seperate ieces of legislation these days). I have no idea if the majority of the states in the US have similar laws on the books, but I'd be surprised if they didn't. It makes sense to have a catch-all for genuinely dangerous driving without having to go in to detail.
The idea that you need to legislate for every eventuality is highly odd, plus it makes bad law as it creates loopholes. After all, they might cover individual instances, but what happens if you're receiving felatio while driving with a pan on your head at the same time as interacting with your pet? DOes that get you off the hook?
Posted by: Archonix at February 10, 2007 5:24 PM
"The idea that you need to legislate for every eventuality is highly odd, plus it makes bad law as it creates loopholes. After all, they might cover individual instances, but what happens if you're receiving felatio while driving with a pan on your head at the same time as interacting with your pet? DOes that get you off the hook?"
Oh Lord, please help me resist the wicked temptation before me!
Posted by: KHarn at February 12, 2007 3:44 PM
