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August 28, 2006

Huffington Moonbat Accuses Republicans of Terrorism

Puffington Host whack job Russell Shaw raised a few eyebrows by expressing a hope that there might be a terror attack prior to the November elections, because he thinks this would hurt Republicans at the polls. To dispel the notion that he must be twisted and insane, Shaw has produced a follow-up post in which he defends himself by pointing out that Republicans themselves are responsible for the following theoretical acts of terror:

  • Your military son being killed fighting terrorists.
  • The victims of Katrina issuing "please help us" screams.
  • Your being put out of work because Republicans won't let the greedy multinational corporation you work for go bankrupt.
  • Developers buying your trailer park.
  • Your having to wait for a bus because demand has driven up oil prices.
  • Your niece having a baby because she would have had to drive 200 miles to have it killed.
  • Your cancer-ridden aunt annoyingly moaning in pain because Republicans won't let her smoke pot or be put out of your misery.
  • Medical insurance prices rising because of the runaway greed of trial lawyers — I mean, because of insufficient regulation.
  • A real estate agent not returning your calls because you're gay.

But it isn't only humans that suffer from Republican terrorism:

The polar bear marooned on the ice floe due to global warming, the tiger who futilely scampers away from high-powered rifle fire at the game ranch owned by rich Republican contributors- well, they are victims of terrorism too.

Kind of puts the small stuff like September 11 into perspective, doesn't it?

bear_ice_floe.jpg
Victim of Republican Terrorism — Or: Lonely He-Bear Making Do

On a tip from Wiggins.

Posted by Van Helsing at August 28, 2006 9:26 PM

Comments

What a f*cking lunatic.

Posted by: Brooklyn Red Leg at August 29, 2006 12:26 AM

Your being put out of work because Republicans won't let the greedy multinational corporation you work for go bankrupt.

Has anyone noticed that this makes absolutely no sense whatsoever?

Posted by: V the K at August 29, 2006 9:07 AM

Hey, V the K,

Of COURSE it makes no sense. Vast tracts of Liberal Left belief haven't made a lick of sense for decades, if they ever did. My personal favorite has always been:

We got into WWI under the Democrat, Wilson.
We got into WWII under the Democrat, FDR
We got into Korea under the Democrat, Truman

Fixing the starting point for our involvement in Vietnam is a little dicey, but it became a serious problem under JFK, and spiraled out of control under LBJ - both Democrats.

Yet according to the Left it is Republicans who are War Mongers.

Posted by: C. S. P. Schofield at August 29, 2006 8:55 PM