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November 27, 2005
Visit Auburn, the Crow Crap Capital
Auburn, New York is known for crows. Every year this upstate town with a population just under 30,000 is inundated by over 60,000 of them. The resulting deluge of crow crap is such a problem that the USDA has attempted to drive the birds away using "a three-pronged audio and visual assault on the birds, including crow calls, pyrotechnics, and lasers" at a cost to the town of about $14,000 last year. A more direct approach is the annual crow hunt, in which teams compete to see who can shoot the most crows.
Naturally moonbats are outraged. A group called Save the Crows is offering a $500 reward "for information leading to the arrest and conviction of those responsible for the deaths of crows by shooting and/or poisoning within the City of Auburn NY."
Citizens Respectful of Wildlife (CROW) believes that instead of killing the crows or trying to drive them away, Auburn should use the crow infestation to draw tourists.
Visitors are advised to pack their umbrellas.
Posted by Van Helsing at November 27, 2005 9:26 PM
Comments
Who in their right mind would want to come and see fields full of crows? I'm not counting the greenies in this statement; very few of them could be classified as being "in their right mind"...
You know what I hate? Magpies. The greenies seem to love them over here, but they're an absolute menace. There's been a year-on-year growth of magpies for hte last few years and they've decimated the local songbird population as a result, mostly by devouring their young and eggs, but the greenies won't acknowledge that. They lay the blame at the feet of the poor domestic cat. I've yet to see a cat that liked to eat eggs...
Posted by: Archonix at November 28, 2005 7:10 AM
It's always about tying our hands behind our backs...By any means possible the Commies will try to do it..The most successful way is to use the helpless little creatures and the environment. Maybe to attract those tourists the town could host a "West-Nile Fest". Free admission if you bring your own mosquitoes.
Posted by: Bobook of da North at November 28, 2005 9:05 AM
Hey, Van, have you seen the pics from Mother Moonbat's Book Signing
This is what happens when the Code Pinkos only let the sane, normal members of the Peace Movement into a book signing.
Posted by: V the K at November 28, 2005 9:19 AM
We get these winter shitbird infestations here in Baltimore, too, though not to this unfortunate extent.
Nevertheless, when someone unwittingly parks his car under one of their roosting trees, good luck getting to work the next day! They crap so much the windshields look like they've been snowed on. Only dry bird crap is a lot harder to scrape away than frozen water.
Last I looked, there were plenty of crows in the country. If the city crows can't be persuaded to join them, I don't see shooting them as a bad alternative.
Silencers, anyone?
Posted by: Cato the Elder at November 28, 2005 3:30 PM
Hey what about the "migratory" Canadian Geese? Here in N VA, they seem to favor the open fields our public schools offer, meaning my son can't go out during PE without having to dance around bits of **** here, there and everywhere.
Posted by: ex-expat at November 28, 2005 4:08 PM
Even in CA, when the crow numbers rise and they become a menace to motorcyclists and such, we just shoot them.
Posted by: Josh at November 29, 2005 1:22 PM
Oh, we get those geese on this side of the pond as well. They congregate around the canal that runs through the centre of my town. Fortunately they stick on the side that nobody walks down so there's not too much worry about stepping in doings.
Posted by: Archonix at November 29, 2005 5:04 PM
