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May 20, 2005
Warning Labels on Hot Dogs?
It looks like there is no evil beyond the all-encompassing reach of do-gooder bureaucrats. The Westchester, New York Journal News reports that bills have been proposed both in Congress and in the New York State Legislature to prevent children from choking.
As if to address a shortage of bureaucrats in the bloated state government — whose excessive taxation and regulation have been steadily driving business out of New York for years — the state bill would create yet another office in the state Department of Health, charged with the task of educating people on how to chew and swallow, as well as making rules requiring warning labels and danger notices.
The state bill is called J.T.'s Law, after a three-year-old who choked to death on a hot dog. "It's just very upsetting to know that this bill is sitting there waiting for approval, and children are dying," lamented the boy's aunt.
The federal bill is called the Food Choking Prevention Act. It would mandate warning labels on foods that a child could choke on, which would cover pretty much everything except Jell-O.
Presumably future legislation will address the issue of how many times a citizen should be required to chew before swallowing.
Posted by Van Helsing at May 20, 2005 6:32 AM
Comments
Actually, Jello would need to be included as well ... people have actually joked on molded gelatin.
(The biggest cause were these little semi-spherical (think half-ball) jobbers that apparently fit quite nicely into, but not through, kids throats)
The nanny state marches on!
/TJ
Posted by: TJ at May 20, 2005 7:45 AM
Congratulations on making the TTLB Top 1000, VH.
Posted by: V the K at May 20, 2005 9:57 AM
Funny! Sad it is true, but still funny!
Posted by: Jay at May 20, 2005 10:07 AM
The Safety Nazis will soon have us all wearing padded helments, inside and out. After all, we could trip and hurt ourselves.
Is there a proper way to munch on the Koran? How many chews per Sura?
Posted by: Cato the Elder at May 20, 2005 11:33 AM
I am SO SAD that I don't live in New York State, because my tax dollars could be going toward such a NOBLE CAUSE as this. But the federal bill will no doubt pass, assuaging my sincere need to support with my tax $$s the extreme governmental oversight of the masticatorially challenged among us.
Um... but what are they gonna do about hot dogs sold at Mets and Yankee's games? They'll probably give these ball parks a pass because the fans are already choaking for other reasons. ;-)
Go O's! Go Nats!
Posted by: The MaryHunter at May 20, 2005 11:47 AM
Not to be argumentative, but the Yankees have won 10 of their last 11. The Gnats are only 1 game ahead of the Mets.
Posted by: Van Helsing at May 20, 2005 1:01 PM
I knew we'd lost out way when I started seeing kids wearing helmets while sledding.
Posted by: The Warden at May 21, 2005 12:11 AM
Hilarious pic, man. Besides.. if ONE 3 year old died from eating a hot dog... it may sound bad of me to say, but so what? More people die from BEE STINGS every year! Are we gonna propose legislation to have some sort of "bee sting awareness" program?? I mean, if the kid died from choking on a hot dog, it's the parents fault for not teaching him to chew his food thoroughly before swallowing (why when I say that word Monica Lewinsky always comes to mind?)!
Posted by: ThaSIckness at May 21, 2005 5:06 PM
