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May 24, 2005
Hanoi John's Time Warp
For a while I was starting to think that Senator Kerry had no intention of living up to the promise he made to all of us in front of Tim Russert and then Don Imus that he would sign Standard Form 180, releasing his military records to the public. But then I realized he would never be so dishonorable.
That leaves only one explanation: Jean François is stuck in a time warp, in which he doesn't fulfill his promise because he hasn't made it yet.
The theory is bold, but the evidence supports it. How else do you explain why even after 9/11, he was referring to Islamic terrorism as a minor nuisance, on a scale with prostitution? Why he voted against funding the war in Iraq after he had already voted in favor of sending our troops over there? Why he seemed to confuse that war with our war in Vietnam, and the war in Vietnam with the medieval conquests of Golden Horde barbarian Jenjis [sic] Khan? Why he continues to campaign half a year after losing the election? Why he still seems to think that phony left-wing posturing will get anyone anywhere?
So when you email Kerry here and tell him that the Standard Form 180 can be found at http://www.archives.gov/research_room/obtain_copies/standard_form_180.pdf, include a fake date from the distant past. Maybe then it will reach him.
Posted by Van Helsing at May 24, 2005 8:39 AM
Comments
Great take, VH. I knew that a warp in the space-time continuum could somehow be blamed. In fact, toss in parallel universes and Kerry is now actually president :SHUDDER: and has decomissioned that pesky SF-180. (Come to think about it: in yet a different parallel universe, Clinton was on watch when 9/11 happened -- 09/11/00, and Gore won. :THUD: )
Posted by: The MaryHunter at May 24, 2005 8:58 AM
Clinton was on watch when 9/11 happened -- 09/11/00
And instead of reading 'My Pet Goat' when it happened, a pantsless Clinton had to be pried off an intern to respond to the national crisis.
Within weeks, Clinton and Madeleine Albright reached a Peace Accord with al-Qaeda, in which al-Qaeda was supplied with nuclear material in return for a promise of no further terrorist attacks. In 2001, Clinton and bin Laden shared the Nobel Peace Prize.
Posted by: V the K at May 24, 2005 5:25 PM
