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January 4, 2005
Proof of Global Warming
To have correct opinions is to know that all problems of significance can be laid at the feet of the economic development enabled by the odious combination of freedom and technology that is epitomized by America.
Take the recent tsunami — you might have thought that was a natural phenomenon. Not so.
As quoted by Steven Milloy, the executive director of Greenpeace UK announced in the wake of the tsunami that "No one can ignore the relentless increase in extreme weather events and so-called natural disasters, which in reality are no more natural than a plastic Christmas tree" and Friends of the Earth Director Tony Juniper considers the tsunami "consistent with climate change predictions."
You see, we now have proof that there is such a thing as global warming. The proof is... it caused the tsunami!
A few unenlightened individuals have suggested that the tsunami was caused by an undersea earthquake. These people must not have seen The Day After Tomorrow, which makes clear that monster tidal waves are Gaia's revenge for greedy Americans who insist on traveling by SUV instead of rickshaw.
Where there is PC lunacy, there are lawyers at the ready to transform it into profit. According to Milloy, they have been working on behalf of insurance companies to establish global warming as a contributing factor to natural disasters, so that deep-pocket corporations can be raided to recoup losses after a tragedy.
It may be an obvious fact that earthquakes, tsunamis, tornados, volcanoes, meteorites, locust swarms, etc. aren't caused by car exhaust. But any ATLA pettifogger worthy to be wearing his own Gucci loafers should be able to scrape up 12 noble citizens who couldn't care less, so long as they have a chance to poke big business in the eye.
Ironically, it is not development but the lack of it that has increased the tsunami's death toll. An early warning system, better sanitation, better hospitals, better roads to get supplies to the needy, well-constructed housing, shelters built on high ground — all these things would come with more development, which might help to explain why no one sees a need for Indonesia to send help when hurricanes hit Florida.
Posted by Van Helsing at January 4, 2005 7:23 AM
Comments
Yeah, but hurricanes only began to hit Florida when global warming started, which is the US's fault, so really no one should send aid to Florida.
Posted by: KJ at January 4, 2005 12:59 PM
I knew Bush did it!
Posted by: Jane at January 4, 2005 2:16 PM
Hi, I am 16 yrs old and I find all this hard to believe.It is just so much going on.
Posted by: Bunny at April 21, 2005 9:27 PM
